girls... this is a question for you

[NGP]

I am not asking about you specifically but about girls in general. Who is more likely to attract a girl and have a romantic relationship... and yes that includes sex; a good hearted, sweet boy, or a charismatic loud douche with a good sense of humor? and who is less likely to have their wife cheat on them?

 

[Emmaa]

I don't think it's possible to say. There are other qualities involved and it also depends on the girl.

Soz, I know this isn't the answer that you wanted but it's true.

 

[Ignace]

NGP, look outside. What do you see the most ? There's your answer.

 

[Horatio]

I've read about a study that was done that proved that females preferred traditionally dark handsome rogues as their sexual partners (including the charade that is romance) BUT they preferred the sweet and nice guys as their long term partner as they are less likely to cheat and more likely to offer a stable future.

So the conclusion of the study was that in an ideal world females would sleep with the charismatic loud douche and then persuade the good hearted sweet boy to be the supportive long term partner and father.

 

[BlackPuma]

I hope you'll excuse me budding in, as I'm not a girl. ;P

But it's not really that simple. A person can't really be described with just one- or two words. A loud charismatic douche can also be a sweet guy, and vice versa.

Every person has at least 25-45(+-) qualities that one can find either desirable or obnoxious. You might not consciously notice them all, but unconsciously you will. And every person (and I do mean EVERY person) has both negative and positive qualities, the trick is to find a balance between the two.

With that said, it comes down the the girl/boy's taste, likes, dislikes, and tolerance. And then you also get circumstance, timing, mood and communication. It's very difficult to give you a specific answer, because there's SO MUCH diversity involved. Even estimating whom is more likely is nothing more then a assumption at best.

 

[NGP]

yeah but the nice guy is so busy with the dates and being friends, which dont get me wrong is a very important part of the relationship, that if he brings up anything physical, then the girl is no longer interested. its either the guy who gets all these one night stands or the nicer guy that has to struggle desperately to have sex with his girlfriend, if he is lucky enough to find one.

 

[Ignace]

Good copy paste. ::

 

[Sinar_Matahari]

I am not asking about you specifically but about girls in general. Who is more likely to attract a girl and have a romantic relationship... and yes that includes sex; a good hearted, sweet boy, or a charismatic loud douche with a good sense of humor? and who is less likely to have their wife cheat on them?

Who is less likely to have their wife cheat on them? There are many reasons for infidelity and it's never as simple as a woman deciding that she will cheat on her husband because he's a sweet person or because he's charismatic or loud or a douche.

I apologize in advance for making the following statement as it has been reiterated ad nauseum throughout our forum: Everyone has their own likes and dislikes. What may attract one person may not necessarily attract another. Some women will be more attracted to sweet guys and some will be attracted to funny charismatic men or even douche bags. I personally like all those traits (sweet and funny being at the top of my list) with the exception of douche bags. I can't stomach a douche bag for longer than five minutes let alone a lifetime.

* Please keep in mind that there is a difference between being sweet and being a kiss ass or doormat.

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

The 'nice guy' thing keeps coming up. It's a ridiculous stereotype. Puma is right, you can't just sum someone up in a word or two.

Even if you could, are you actually going to transform yourself from one stereotype to another? That would be a futile effort.

If you are wanting to get a girlfriend, concentrate on how you're going to meet them rather than who you should be for them.

 

[Sinar_Matahari]

I hope you'll excuse me budding in, as I'm not a girl. ;P

But it's not really that simple. A person can't really be described with just one- or two words. A loud charismatic douche can also be a sweet guy, and vice versa.

Every person has at least 25-45(+-) qualities that one can find either desirable or obnoxious. You might not consciously notice them all, but unconsciously you will. And every person (and I do mean EVERY person) has both negative and positive qualities, the trick is to find a balance between the two.

With that said, it comes down the the girl/boy's taste, likes, dislikes, and tolerance. And then you also get circumstance, timing, mood and communication. It's very difficult to give you a specific answer, because there's SO MUCH diversity involved. Even estimating whom is more likely is nothing more then a assumption at best.

Had I read your response first, I would have never put in my two cents. :: You already stated what I wrote and much more.

 

[Pacific_Loner]

The 'nice guy' thing keeps coming up. It's a ridiculous stereotype. Puma is right, you can't just sum someone up in a word or two.

Even if you could, are you actually going to transform yourself from one stereotype to another? That would be a futile effort.

If you are wanting to get a girlfriend, concentrate on how you're going to meet them rather than who you should be for them.

I agree with that.
There is all kind of people for all kind of taste.
About cheating, I guess in general the guy who severly neglect his girlfriend is more likely to be cheated on. Because she feels like she's single. But it depends more on the girl personnality. I mean if you get cheated on, most of the time it won't be your fault, whoever you are.

 

[Remus]

The 'nice guy' thing keeps coming up. It's a ridiculous stereotype. Puma is right, you can't just sum someone up in a word or two.

People who think they are nice, seldom are.

 

[Pacific_Loner]

yeah but the nice guy is so busy with the dates and being friends, which dont get me wrong is a very important part of the relationship, that if he brings up anything physical, then the girl is no longer interested. its either the guy who gets all these one night stands or the nicer guy that has to struggle desperately to have sex with his girlfriend, if he is lucky enough to find one.

And I don't want to sound mean but... Either you are too hasty or there is something you didn't get.

 

[Felgen]

I am not asking about you specifically but about girls in general. Who is more likely to attract a girl and have a romantic relationship... and yes that includes sex; a good hearted, sweet boy, or a charismatic loud douche with a good sense of humor? and who is less likely to have their wife cheat on them?

How old are you? Charisma can be learned (even I, who have Asperger's managed to learn it) and so can humour.

If you're still in high school, then don't worry. Those cool wannabe gangsters who get all the girls now, won't be popular among the chicks in five to ten years.

I may seem like a dick for saying this, but I considered cheating on my ex before. I broke up before I went that far though, as I am an honest man.

 

[Falkor]

Every other girl has different qualities she looks for in a man. So the only advice is.. Just be yourself, wait for the woman who totally respects you but Charisma is a good way of attraction, but some girl likes the macho man, other's like the gentleman, other's like the romantic caring boy, other's fall for the personality and the person deep inside. You will find your true love, if you just wait, till you walk the path of love. Every girl has different prefferences

Yes, charisma can be learned, you can train your social skills, have a confidental body language and even learn to flirt a bit
You can also learn to be less shy and be humouristic around the person you like. But still, you should never pretend.
You just have to have a ''vibe'' and there must be attraction, there must be a click, and ''match'' like common interests, or totally the opposite.

 

[NGP]

thanks everyone really great answers. But Flowergirlie, i must be doing something wrong because sometimes i do feel someone is attracted to me, but when i start talking to her, i see her interest fizzling out, i know there is no way for you to know why. But i am pretty good looking, and for some reason i must not be trying hard enough. Or maybe i am creepy? I dont know.

 

[MollyBeGood]

My advice being female...Be yourself, don't worry about what other people are doing/do-goes for relationships too.
You cannot predict anything or control anyone else s emotions or actions but your own so don't over think, try not to, just be you with all your uniqueness and your own style.
If you are true to yourself and honest and loving then hopefully you will meet a woman who respects those qualities in you and loves you for who you are Not some facade or macho man crap-just a good person with a loving heart is all you need to be. A good woman will always respect these qualities in you.
You have to not fear rejection that is key. You have to be able to say to yourself when that girl walks away and you thought she was the one, "Ok, she wasn't" . There are a lot of fish in the sea. It takes a lot of trial and error and it hurts like hell.
love stinks-that's an understatement...but when it's right, nothing compares.
Good Luck!

 

[Felgen]

Actually, if all you've ever tried is being yourself and it didn't pay off, you might consider bettering your social skills (learning to make friends, learning how to flirt with a girl and so on). Lack of social skills is a huge obstacle, so you might want to make yourself more attractive by gaining some muscle and working hard on getting a good education as well.

 

[sunboy400]

I am not asking about you specifically but about girls in general. Who is more likely to attract a girl and have a romantic relationship... and yes that includes sex; a good hearted, sweet boy, or a charismatic loud douche with a good sense of humor? and who is less likely to have their wife cheat on them?

i honestly feel everything depends on the girl.But most of them wanna have fun thats why they hang out with the douche bag/ loud guys but when they wanna settle down and start a family they meet the quiet guy who they feel wont cheat on them.but at the end of the day we cant really say it all depends on the girl.

 

[philly2bits]

I am not asking about you specifically but about girls in general. Who is more likely to attract a girl and have a romantic relationship... and yes that includes sex; a good hearted, sweet boy, or a charismatic loud douche with a good sense of humor? and who is less likely to have their wife cheat on them?

What do you hope to gain by asking such a question? Any girl on this forum can only give advice on who they specifically are attracted to. They can't speak for all girls and if they do then the advice will be extremely broad to the point of being no use to you.

You put yourself into the "good hearted sweet boy" camp. Are you looking for some kind of reassurance that this the "right" way to be? Because I'm telling you now that the only "right" way to be is to be yourself, whether it be a good guy or a loud douche. Any other way is called acting and I guarantee a relationship built on such false pretenses is worse then being alone.