Do you struggle with identity?

Do you struggle with identity?

  • YES - I feel open-minded and easily persuaded

    Votes: 14 41.2%
  • SOMETIMES - I know who I am but sometimes feel impressionable

    Votes: 12 35.3%
  • NO - I stand firm in my beliefs and nothing will sway me

    Votes: 8 23.5%

  • Total voters
    34

dottie

Well-known member
Do you struggle with identity?

This is basically knowing your roots, what you're about, your beliefs, what you are willing to give, things like this...
 

FountainandFairfax

in a VAN down by the RIVER
I feel like I do. Maybe it's an artist thing as much as a SP thing, though. Or maybe they're the same root. I don't know.

The last girl I dated, back in the paleolithic era, her parting-shot was "At least I know who I am."

ouch
 

NathanielWingatePeaslee

Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!
Staff member
I feel like I do. Maybe it's an artist thing as much as a SP thing, though. Or maybe they're the same root. I don't know.

The last girl I dated, back in the paleolithic era, her parting-shot was "At least I know who I am."

ouch
Is your avatar the narrator from Fight Club? It would seem apropos.



To answer the question: not really, no. I had a major crisis around age 18 and spent a great deal of time and energy seeking answers.

Since then I've had a pretty good idea of what I'm about; my beliefs, and all that.
 
who are you

Most definitely. I haven't the slightest clue who I am or what I'm about, most of me defining who I am is nothing but endless confusion. I have some beliefs I have strongly held convictions about, but other than that I don't know who I am or what my purpose is. It's hard to think about sometimes, and trying to figure it all out often leaves me feeling frustrated and depressed. I wonder if finding an identity and figuring yourself out more could be a useful tool in becoming a better person, and getting over some of this nonsense. Oh the confusion.
 

Kiwong

Well-known member
Yes, during bouts of depression I lose touch with who I am altogether. That horrible sense of depersonalisation. This is my life, this is who I am, and my soul sinks inside.

However, I am quite strong in my beliefs, and am not easily persuaded.

I am thankful for the things that define me. The things I was glad to be born me and no one else.
 
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ImNotMyIllness

Well-known member
There should be more options. I'm firm in many of my beliefs but always remain open minded to sound arguments. I'm willing to consider other points of view and reevaluate my own positions.
 

Odo

Banned
I can be persuaded, but someone will have to really know what they're talking about in order to do so.
 

goblin

Well-known member
Not since I started realizing that those who enforce the social norms status quo are never satisfied and prefer tact to truth.
 

nicole1

Well-known member
I'm not sure what being impressionable has to do with this, but a lot of times I'm not certain who I am. I am secure in a lot of my beliefs, but I can be open minded about some things and changing my mind if the evidence challenges my standing beliefs in such a way that it would be ignorant not to evaluate and change them. It just makes sense.
The problem comes in situations where I don't know what I'm doing or what I really like as a person. Like with career path and liking certain people because I may have been wrong before.
 

dottie

Well-known member
Not since I started realizing that those who enforce the social norms status quo are never satisfied and prefer tact to truth.

You don't think there is a way to be honest and maintain tact at the same time?
 

dottie

Well-known member
I marked "yes" but probably should have put "sometimes". There are a lot of things that I have firmly rooted beliefs in... but other things I feel can be swayed by the company I am in. This part of me makes me feel vulnerable.
 

goblin

Well-known member
You don't think there is a way to be honest and maintain tact at the same time?

Of course there is, but the people I'm referring to don't care about what's true, they care about what "should be" and what feels good.

I've been ejected from groups for not conforming to how much about myself I should share and how feely I should be despite causing no truth-over-tact harm. When I found out that these kinds of people could never be satisfied by someone like me, I stopped looking at myself as just a broken version of them in need of correction.
 

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
everytime someone post a thread about knowing who we are and I try to respond, I realize I have no idea what the expression "knowing who I am" means. It just seems a total abstraction to me. I'm not sure why I can't get it but it starting to bug me. If someone can try and explain to me like I'm a 5 year old, I'd be thankful.
 

dottie

Well-known member
everytime someone post a thread about knowing who we are and I try to respond, I realize I have no idea what the expression "knowing who I am" means. It just seems a total abstraction to me. I'm not sure why I can't get it but it starting to bug me. If someone can try and explain to me like I'm a 5 year old, I'd be thankful.

Yeah, this is pretty abstract. What I was getting at was knowing your core beliefs and values...

Religion, politics, finances, security, what you are willing to negotiate, what you are willing to give up.
 

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
Yeah, this is pretty abstract. What I was getting at was knowing your core beliefs and values...

Religion, politics, finances, security, what you are willing to negotiate, what you are willing to give up.

But if your values and beliefs change as you grow older, does it mean you don't know who you are, or that you have a weak identity?

And isn't beliefs and values globally the same for a given culture, which would mean that "who I am" can pretty much be resumed to who my people is?

Or is it not what you mean?

I hope I'm not leading your thread astray with my confusion
 

Livemylife

Well-known member
No, I'm surer now than ever about my identity. I don't think I was ever confused about myself. I think I was confused about society if anything.

I've had a few epiphanies in the last 5 months or so. I get what all makes me weird and why I felt like everyone else was so bizarre. And honestly, therapy didn't even help me understand myself. Years ago I was dropping hints to my therapists, but they just brushed it off, probably too stupid to get it. I tried to explain to them how I didn't get the obsession with looks or how I used my eyes secondary and use mental thoughts more. I eventually figured out I'm not a visual person. The list goes on. It's fine with me, I like how I am and wouldn't want to be any other way. :thumbup:

I'm not sure what open-mindedness has to do with this. Maybe the word you are looking for is gullible. Open-mindedness is a good thing and a quality every scientist should have. Or maybe you are talking about conformity.
 

NathanielWingatePeaslee

Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!
Staff member
But if your values and beliefs change as you grow older, does it mean you don't know who you are, or that you have a weak identity?

And isn't beliefs and values globally the same for a given culture, which would mean that "who I am" can pretty much be resumed to who my people is?

Or is it not what you mean?

I hope I'm not leading your thread astray with my confusion

Your brain: it is delicious. I want to eat it up with a spoon. :perfect:
















Opal, if you're reading this, I swear it's nothing to do with zombies of any sort. Really.
 

dottie

Well-known member
But if your values and beliefs change as you grow older, does it mean you don't know who you are, or that you have a weak identity?

No, people grow and evolve.

And isn't beliefs and values globally the same for a given culture, which would mean that "who I am" can pretty much be resumed to who my people is?

Or is it not what you mean?

This sounds obvious... but if you live in America (particularly the West Coast) aka the melting pot, you'll find all sorts of people from various cultures mixed together and things get a little trickier. You become exposed to all sorts of cultures and become confused about your own identity (well, not you, but me!). In America families are transient and aren't always in close proximity which also contributes to insecurity. In other countries it seems easier to equate identity with region or people.

I hope I'm not leading your thread astray with my confusion

Not at all! I am glad you bring these things up.
 
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