do you have a 'life'?

[MikeyC]

Am I happy?
No.
But I also don't care that I don't have a life, because I'm depressed.
It's hard to truly care about anything.

I feel for you, Weirdy. I honestly do. ::

I live like a hermit, I have no friends as a result (in real life).....do the same routine everyday.
I have just existed in a blur of repetition for about 8 years now.
However I am so used to living in a non-stop routine that I think I would fear having to live outside it now :/

Is there any way you could slightly tweak your routine? Nothing that involves a massive change, but a small one so you can get some difference in your life?

 

[megalon]

Nope, no life. I go to work and I go home. This thread reminded me of a song.

Nine Inch Nails - Everyday Is Exactly The Same - YouTube
I believe I can see the future
Cause I repeat the same routine
I think I used to have a purpose
But then again
That might have been a dream
I think I used to have a voice
Now I never make a sound

 

[Falkor]

What does make a life, a life? Are there any rules to be a LIFE?
I already live, and life's awesome. Thanks to above!

Oh well... I do have a life. I go to college from Mon to Friday.
I go to CBT/mindfulness on Monday.
DGT social skills training/assertiveness on Thursday.
Panic attack training on Tuesday. (lots of therapy, but i'm so grateful, i need it... to improve)

I'm looking for an internship to follow soon... (this is what makes me feel more that I'm alive.. I think internships are awesome).

And I see my girlfriend in weekends, when we both have time and want to spent time together! Xmas Holiday I will, after Xmas days.

I'll just celebrate with my own fam, and we will make a trip... So that's great.
I like to make trips... Especially far. Or I like the dolphin shows..

And Old year's eve I'll be with my love, she's my firework lol

But I don't have many friends, so socially i'm a wreck.. I don't have anyone to go out with,, so yeah, that is ****ty sometimes

And I'd wish I could sing ... with a band.. I don't have one.

But I guess you folks would say I'm pretty social,
according to having a girlfriend and college, but believe me....

I stayed at home for 3,5 (almost 4) years...
had no friends to talk to..
my family was there for me though...
I had to stay in 3 mental clinics....
had to do hospital visits..
Didn't even reach my mailbox.... so anxious.
And I didn't have college, for so long..... So I missed a lot.. and that is not fun! Sometimes I blame it on myself, but it's SA... Still friggin' hard to believe that I was staying in the dark for such a long time....

Also I was depressed back then and suicidal... Just see how things can change... Just by changing your life and meeting a lover or a great friendship.. It's all worth it.. and definitely college too, you have a day routine and not a daily structure of NOTHING.... wake up at 4 pm each day and just don't eat and don't drink and just get an eating disorder like i did.. -_-' (totally recovered btw also got fat making pills lol, still thin.. but not sicky thin, just normal thin, still wanna gain some weight, but i'm normal now. yay lol)

and seeking help.. I know some never want it, but it will help you hella good!

and see people cycling outside while having the urge of going with them and go to their school.. hehe, no i just wished so bad to get outside the house..

i've been like like a hella of insanity for so long and wanted to ''end it''.
And now it's starting... Morely like heaven, but I like ''LIFE'' too much... And I realised, this is HEAVEN....

It's a miracle to live, and I should thank everyone to help me out and be happy that i found back the strength in my mind.

 

[fitftw]

It's 1:40pm on Saturday and I'm still in my PJ's. I haven't gone outside yet. I ate breakfast, 2 eggs and 2 waffles, and played videogames for a few hours. Now I've been surfing the net, thinking about where to go. I have car parts that I need to put on but I am so depressed, I can't go anywhere or do anything.

I feel paralyzed, every day. Yes, I have a girlfriend who lives with me and sleeps in my bed. She works Monday through Friday. I collect unemployment. She is off on vacation now for the next 10 days and I have no idea what to do. She knows how I am, how I don't like to do anything, but lately something's been off with her. She has her own issues. She didn't eat anything yesterday, she thinks she's fat even though I tell her she's not. She could afford to lose some but I don't tell her that...

There are so many philosophies I could come up with why we exist and who we are. None of them matter. Nothing matters. Why?

Because we're all just
Pennywise Killing Time - YouTube

On my TV, violent images flash across my screen
A world of hate, staring at the rise in murder rate
I can't believe what we've become
Is all hope lost to everyone?
A battered wife waits for us to hear
Her screams tonight
A child of war,
Wonders what we're all fighting for

I look and think how can this be?
What causes all our suffering?
Eyes wide open we can't see
I can't understand it's out of hand
To me we're all just killing time
Killing time
Killing time
Ruining our lives
Still we all refuse to see the signs

A ruthless gang, teaches all the kids to act insane
Religious right, is buying up guns for a hell of a fight
Another victim lies in pain
A serial killer waits for fame
Have we all gone so insane?
I can't understand it's out of hand
To me we're all just killing time
Killing time

I can't believe there's got to be
Some way to break through
I think that I, will have to try, or I'll lose my mind
We're all killing time
Killing time
Killing time
Ruining our lives
Still we all refuse to see the signs
Why? Why? Why?

 

[Falkor]

I'm sorry to hear Fifth, hope your girlfriend will feel better soon and YOU too..
I'm glad she understands your situation, that is amazing!

Does she has an eating disorder ? or just didn't want to eat cuz of stress?

hopefully she wont get something like that.. it's horrible!

Take care bro!!!!

 

[da_illest101]

Yes I do, I'm an hermit, that only goes out for work and school. I stay home staying online or playing video games. That's my life and that's the way I like it. Sure having a gf wouldn't hurt either

 

[Fen]

Of course I have it! And it is really gorgeous and beautiful!
Here a pic!

It's cool, isn't it?

Wait, did you say life and not knife?
In that case, no, I'm afraid I haven't anything like that. But on the other hand that knife is very very good...

 

[Graeme1988]

No. Unless you consider waking up at noon, listening to music or watching cartoons most days having a "life".

 

[bluebells]

i'm not living, i'm just killing tiiiime.

 

[elek2ronik]

i'm not living, i'm just killing tiiiime.

you are a great person and I am happy to have you living as my friend

 

[AGR]

Well I practically dont,I go to work,I have a boxing gym membership,but I struggle to go there,I dont know why because I have so much fun there,I spend my free time watching movies,mma and boxing's biggest fights,I am getting back to studying,I probably will never marry,I am ok with that,its other people who arent and keep bugging me,if I do she would have to be ok with that or be kinda like me,but I can go out if I want to,which is a step foward from a few years back.

 

[bsammy]

here i am doing the same things i do every other day.its 5 oclock and im just going to take a short nap to wake up later to watch the ball game..am i happy doing this?nope but what is it that i want to do?umm i cant think of anything to be honest and theres my dilemma..even if i did have something i really wanted to do, would i have the energy to do it?probably not.vicious cycle.

how many of you think you can change and break out of your hermit ways?what is it going to take?

 

[bluebells]

you are a great person and I am happy to have you living as my friend

oh wow, thankyou! right back at ya

 

[AGR]

how many of you think you can change and break out of your hermit ways?what is it going to take?

Well I can,there is a guy who says he wants to make me turn "bad",so he is always inviting me to go to clubs and brothel,but I wont do those things,so no thanks,in some way I like that I have time for myself,to study,read on things.

 

[MikeyC]

Well I can,there is a guy who says he wants to make me turn "bad",so he is always inviting me to go to clubs and bordels,but I wont do those things,so no thanks,in some way I like that I have time for myself,to study,read on things.

I have a few people that want me to drink more and to go out to clubs more, but I have a good excuse (work). There are times I want to just stay at home and have no interruptions.

Maybe you could divide your time? Like, one night go to a club, but the next night read and have a quiet one? That would be good, and you might even enjoy yourself on the nights you do go out.

 

[OceanMist]

When someone says this, it seems they usually mean social life. I have no social life. I'm trying to change that by meeting women in person through online dating.

 

[MercySparx]

^^how much 'better' can we get though?i have found that even after learning social skills and forcing myself out into social situations, the best i can do for the most part is simply tolerate social events better.i still dont enjoy social gatherings much at all.i can 'blend in' better at social events, pretend im normal.the problem is though, this takes alot of energy and effort and leaves me exhausted for awhile afterwards..also, these social gatherings also give me a nasty reality check in that i realize how different i am from most people when it comes to socializing, their busy lives etc etc..i have not much of a life so i have to embellish things and it gets old.so, in a way forcing myself out socially helps in a way and backfires in other ways.

bluedays-yes im the same way.when i try to do other things, its because i was invited by someone else.left to my own devices, you give me a weekend to kill with doing whatever it is i want, and i will not know what to do!its like in many cases i dont know how to live a normal life.

theres no doubt evn extroverts get stuck in boring lives but at least in their case they have alot of wiggle room..in an avoidants case, we live almost in a prison cell of our own mind..we are handicapped in ways normnal people cannot imagine.

I'm an excellent example of how much better you can get. I was diagnosed with social phobia and agoraphobia when I was 13. Full blown panic attacks and hysterical fits. Now, I consider myself more or less cured. Yes, I'm a bit of a loner, I like my personal space, but I do enjoy my social time. I'm an introvert but I've learned to switch that. I have a healthy self esteem and high confidence (recently medical problems have dented that a bit). I've actually become rather outgoing like others of my zodiac brotherhood (leo.) I still get the physical symptoms of anxiety before I go out but I recognize it, breath, maybe have a smoke and its gone. I also have anxiety during sex, as I mentioned in another thread, but it hasn't stopped me from having some great experiences......with my vagina

No one who knows me now would EVER describe me as shy. Most people, if not put off by my bluntness or (their stupidity to not understand my) humor, find me to be charismatic and self-assured.

 

[A86]

^^how much 'better' can we get though?i have found that even after learning social skills and forcing myself out into social situations, the best i can do for the most part is simply tolerate social events better.i still dont enjoy social gatherings much at all.i can 'blend in' better at social events, pretend im normal.the problem is though, this takes alot of energy and effort and leaves me exhausted for awhile afterwards..also, these social gatherings also give me a nasty reality check in that i realize how different i am from most people when it comes to socializing, their busy lives etc etc..i have not much of a life so i have to embellish things and it gets old.so, in a way forcing myself out socially helps in a way and backfires in other ways.

You put words to my thoughts.
I have a life, it may not be comprehended by the social norm, but I accept it as it is and as a result, its a happy often mis-understood life, but its mine.

 

[1BlackSheep]

You put words to my thoughts.
I have a life, it may not be comprehended by the social norm, but I accept it as it is and as a result, its a happy often mis-understood life, but its mine.

I'm in agreement with you both! It seems other people are less accepting of my life than I am.

 

[Warrior Poet]

To society"s standard: no

To mine: yes