Arohanui - Ake Ake KiaKaha's Journal
- Thread starter KiaKaha
- Start date
MsBuzzkillington
Well-known member
Sounds awesome! I am so happy that it went well.
Try not to worry about being "too nice" some girls absolutely love the really nice guy. She seems to like you for who you are, so try and stay positive.
Try not to worry about being "too nice" some girls absolutely love the really nice guy. She seems to like you for who you are, so try and stay positive.
That sounds so sweet, glad your date went swell. If she's talked to you before, I think she will try to understand where you're coming from due to the online connection and it being a sweet first date. You're a nice person and there are women ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶s̶e̶n̶s̶e̶ that genuinely want that. I see where you're coming from when you say you don't want to get too attached, I understand. I just hope it goes well for you. 
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KiaKaha
Banned
Hey thanks everyone - I appreciate the support and encouragement. I am trying to keep the insecurity at bay. We seem to have a lot in common. We both cant stand rugby - nor do we like going to bars/clubs, we both like to read - have similar interests in movies and heaps of other stuff...we have a similar attitude toward life... except shes probably far less cynical than I am.... she thinks I am funny too.... I have always had the ability to make women laugh though....even if I do say so myself.
I will keep you updated.... but be warned, the moment I invest emotionally in her or get my expectations higher than the tolerable threshold and it doesnt work out... there WILL be a lot of complaining, conclusion jumping, distorted thinking and negativity....just sayin. She can already tell I am a little bit shy.... a slippery slope? The beginning of the end before its even started? Only time will tell....
In the meantime.... heres a pic of the sunset we both shared. May the vomit flow fluidly and with much vigour.
I will keep you updated.... but be warned, the moment I invest emotionally in her or get my expectations higher than the tolerable threshold and it doesnt work out... there WILL be a lot of complaining, conclusion jumping, distorted thinking and negativity....just sayin. She can already tell I am a little bit shy.... a slippery slope? The beginning of the end before its even started? Only time will tell....
In the meantime.... heres a pic of the sunset we both shared. May the vomit flow fluidly and with much vigour.
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Kat
Well-known member
Looks like all the right areas are conveniently darkened
I'll have to remember the warning I'll keep the high hopes for you.
1BlackSheep
Well-known member
Ah, your secret has been exposed! You really are a big teddy bear! ::
Fingers crossed that all continues to go well!
:Fingers crossed that all continues to go well!
SilentBird
Well-known member
Aw geez. You (both?) had a great time and she did that. Sending a message like that is lame.
Don't give up.
Don't give up.
KiaKaha
Banned
She whaaaa...It makes no sense...
Did you see her today as planned?
It does make sense... I know why it makes sense, because its always the same....I am simply not 'boyfriend' material.
Even the guy that she told me about last night - her previous boyfriend that completely dominated her was possessive and physically abused her got a few months in.... more of a chance than I did.... but go figure.
No I havent seen her today. Cutting all contact.
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Hmm I think....if I may offer my thoughts. ...
Well I think theres no such thing as boyfriend material. No guy I know is boyfriend material until he meets the right girl.
I dont understand this girl. What you described was the perfect date.
I think you executed your side of this beautifully.
She on the other hand referenced her ex on a first date (Red alarm) on top of which revealed his abusive nature? !?! In my opinion, anyone who talks about their ex isnt really available, theyre still involved (even if they dont know it)
Her ex was boyfriend material for her, Kia its a very very very good thing that she does not put you in the same bracket as him. You are not abusive and possesive. You are sweet and kind and handsome and a perfect gentleman.
Well I think theres no such thing as boyfriend material. No guy I know is boyfriend material until he meets the right girl.
I dont understand this girl. What you described was the perfect date.
I think you executed your side of this beautifully.
She on the other hand referenced her ex on a first date (Red alarm) on top of which revealed his abusive nature? !?! In my opinion, anyone who talks about their ex isnt really available, theyre still involved (even if they dont know it)
Her ex was boyfriend material for her, Kia its a very very very good thing that she does not put you in the same bracket as him. You are not abusive and possesive. You are sweet and kind and handsome and a perfect gentleman.
Kat
Well-known member
What Jewel said and I’m sorry to hear that:: .Just remember it’s not because you are nice guy this girl has an unhealthy self-esteem and it is unhealthy and definitely not the best way to measure yourself worth against this kind of mentality. I’m sure she’s a good person and she too is too distorted to realize what she has but she only represents herself not us all.
: .Just remember it’s not because you are nice guy this girl has an unhealthy self-esteem and it is unhealthy and definitely not the best way to measure yourself worth against this kind of mentality. I’m sure she’s a good person and she too is too distorted to realize what she has but she only represents herself not us all.
MsBuzzkillington
Well-known member
I wouldn't suggest cutting all contact with her, you can still be friends/ What's wrong with having a friend?
Sorry to hear that things aren't going to work out. These things tend to happen.
I am editing this a bit late, but something about abusive relationships that you have to understand is that they are about more than just her staying with him despite him being a jerk. There are a lot of mental issues involved in those situations that keep the girl around, none of which have to do with actually totally wanting to stay with a complete abusive jerk.
You will be boyfriend material to someone. You will be the perfect guy for someone. She is out there.
Sorry to hear that things aren't going to work out. These things tend to happen.
I am editing this a bit late, but something about abusive relationships that you have to understand is that they are about more than just her staying with him despite him being a jerk. There are a lot of mental issues involved in those situations that keep the girl around, none of which have to do with actually totally wanting to stay with a complete abusive jerk.
You will be boyfriend material to someone. You will be the perfect guy for someone. She is out there.
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