Are you a Virgin?

Are you a Virgin?

  • Total voters
    147
Daniel089

Daniel089

Well-known member
I'm virgin too (age:23) You know technically sex will come at the right moment, right place, so I'm pretty sure I won't be frustrated about it because by then my partner will sense it's natural to get into the whole sex thing, and then I'll see the green light in front of me...
Reaching a certain level of intimacy is the key, I was beneath that level once and it actually gave me confidence.
 
Last edited:
MotherWolff

MotherWolff

Banned
coyote said:
you're right on both counts
Click to expand...

I am? Wow, I'm actually right for a change.

Anyways,I would very much like to uh, make love or whatever, but besides the fact that I'm a little scared to do so, I don't even think its that great. I can find loads of other ways to please myself. And I think sex gets old after while. I'm just sayin'. Or maybe I just feel this way because I can't get none.::(:
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
MotherWolff said:
I am? Wow, I'm actually right for a change.

Anyways,I would very much like to uh, make love or whatever, but besides the fact that I'm a little scared to do so, I don't even think its that great. I can find loads of other ways to please myself. And I think sex gets old after while. I'm just sayin'. Or maybe I just feel this way because I can't get none.::(:
Click to expand...

it CAN be great, sometimes exquisitely beautiful. it can also be not so great, sometimes even horrible.

like most things in life, the quality of the experience depends entirely upon what you put into it - both you and your partner

in my experience, that's why it's usually better when it's an act of giving/ sharing between two people who have each other's best interest at heart
 
GraybeardGhost

GraybeardGhost

Well-known member
CursedSoul said:
me too poster number 5
Click to expand...

To whom are you referring here? We have names. You may use them.

knowledgeofself said:
CursedSoul said:
it also makes a sense if you think its for purity of soul
Click to expand...
I don't understand what you mean here. how does having sex taint your soul? its one of the human body's natural incentives to want to procreate.
Click to expand...

Sex will not taint your soul. It is a good and natural act, when not twisted into something injurious. However, many people believe that abstinence from sex and other indulgences (e.g., alcohol, certain foods, etc.) may have a cleansing or purifying effect on the mind and spirit. It's a form of self-discipline and sacrifice.
 
Helmaninquiel

Helmaninquiel

Well-known member
I've had the opertunity but just couldn't go through with it. I just don't think I'm a sexual being, or I've just never been attracted to someone enough. I want kids one day which means ill have too. I don't know what happens, happens. What doesn't, doesn't.
 
OceanMist

OceanMist

Well-known member
QUOTEAmp;Right, but we're talking about using people. As you said before. See above post for the distinction.

You still aren't getting this. I am saying that using someone isn't always using someone.

Case in point, lets say a guy uses a woman for sex. Is she totally used? Well no, not if she enjoyed the sex. In fact, she may not feel used at all, even if the guy's intention was to use her for sex.

I mean, she may have been using him too.

Do you honestly think casual sex is absolutely emotionally fulfilling for everyone?

You say everyone.....well everyone doesn't really seem relevant here. Sex doesn't have to be emotionally filling for everyone.

I do think casual sex is absolutely fulfilling for a lot of people. Sex feels good to most people. It doesn't matter to a lot of people whether it's casual or meaningless sex.


One of the few good friends I have compulsively sleeps with men, and is probably the loneliest person I know. Being around people doesn't mean you aren't lonely. I'm around people a lot, I still feel lonely. Alone... lonely.. different things.

Once again, I'm not saying everyone who has lots of sex isn't lonely. But most people that sleep with other people often are around other people a lot, hence, they usually aren't lonely.

Your friend is just an isolated example.


If you are misleading women into thinking that there's more to it, then that's essentially preying on the vulnerable.

And how do you assume I'm misleading these women?

As I told you before, the women I used for sex only averaged two dates with me. How exactly was I leading on them on after that extremely short time period?

It's not like I told them I was in it for the long haul.

Besides, they chose to have sex that early in the dating thing. Someone can't expect a giant commitment two dates into a dating thing.

Hell, two dates in......that's not even close to a relationship.

A lot of people have sex early on from social pressure, or lack of self-esteem.

Um, okay? Not sure what your point is?

Are you saying they don't deserve to be used because of social pressure? If so, I disagree. Once again, the sex is consensual. Nobody is getting raped here.



The way you talk about yourself implies that you don't value yourself. So, what I'm saying is, when people use others, and discard them so easily, it does nothing but perpetuate feelings of worthlessness that already exist.

I don't know about you but after having sex with the women I've been with I've felt more confident and it boosted my self esteem significantly.

I really have no clue where you got that I don't value myself. In fact, I value myself quite a lot considering I don't think these women I had sex with are good enough for me.
 
Last edited:
U

user deleted

Guest
@ OceanMist

As mentioned earlier, the word 'using' has negative connotations, it implies that you are getting what you want from someone to their detriment. I also got the impression that you were misleading women into believing you were emotionally attached. You have since clarified, so that doesn't really stand. You also imply that my comments are making generalisations using isolated examples, when they were actually intended to combat the brash generalisations I felt you made.

I wasn't implying any level of non-consent or rape, I was only pointing out a reason why a woman may have sex with you very quickly, it doesn't necessarily mean that she is in the same place as you (i.e. seeing it as 'just sex') and may have sex with you because they feel they should, or that they are seeking approval. Now, I'm not saying this is every single time, nor even am I asserting it's a majority case, but if I was in the habit of having casual sex I'd make sure the people I was sleeping with knew my intentions from the outset, rather than think "It's their problem if they get hurt" (as you stated previously).

Again, you're saying people who have lots of sex usually aren't lonely. I made a point of contending that because I feel that it can quite often be quite the opposite. Being alone and being lonely aren't the same thing. The reason I made a point of saying "do you think that everyone.." is because your posts tend towards making generalisations where I don't think generalisations apply or are justifiable.

I've basically had to repeat myself in this post as I'm re-addressing the same points as before. I'm disinclined to provide another point-by-point rebuttal. I don't know whether you're intentionally misconstruing what I'm saying, but I suggest that we just 'agree to disagree' on this matter as there seems to be some miscommunication somewhere along the way.
 
OceanMist

OceanMist

Well-known member
Amp said:
@ OceanMist

As mentioned earlier, the word 'using' has negative connotations, it implies that you are getting what you want from someone to their detriment. I also got the impression that you were misleading women into believing you were emotionally attached. You have since clarified, so that doesn't really stand. You also imply that my comments are making generalisations using isolated examples, when they were actually intended to combat the brash generalisations I felt you made.

I wasn't implying any level of non-consent or rape, I was only pointing out a reason why a woman may have sex with you very quickly, it doesn't necessarily mean that she is in the same place as you (i.e. seeing it as 'just sex') and may have sex with you because they feel they should, or that they are seeking approval. Now, I'm not saying this is every single time, nor even am I asserting it's a majority case, but if I was in the habit of having casual sex I'd make sure the people I was sleeping with knew my intentions from the outset, rather than think "It's their problem if they get hurt" (as you stated previously).

Again, you're saying people who have lots of sex usually aren't lonely. I made a point of contending that because I feel that it can quite often be quite the opposite. Being alone and being lonely aren't the same thing. The reason I made a point of saying "do you think that everyone.." is because your posts tend towards making generalisations where I don't think generalisations apply or are justifiable.

I've basically had to repeat myself in this post as I'm re-addressing the same points as before. I'm disinclined to provide another point-by-point rebuttal. I don't know whether you're intentionally misconstruing what I'm saying, but I suggest that we just 'agree to disagree' on this matter as there seems to be some miscommunication somewhere along the way.
Click to expand...

I understand what you are trying to say, I just disagree with it. Hence, you feel like I'm not "understanding" you.

About the lonely vs. alone thing, I believe that someone who is around people often is someone who isn't lonely or alone.

Such is usually the case that someone who is often around people isn't alone or lonely. I mean, it's kind of common sense..... a person that has a lot of friends is usually the one who isn't lonely. More people usually = less loneliness or aloneness.

Such is also the case with people that have a lot of sex. It's usually the sex hound that has a large social circle and talks to people often.
 
CursedSoul

CursedSoul

Banned
OceanMist said:
I understand what you are trying to say, I just disagree with it. Hence, you feel like I'm not "understanding" you.

About the lonely vs. alone thing, I believe that someone who is around people often is someone who isn't lonely or alone.

Such is usually the case that someone who is often around people isn't alone or lonely. I mean, it's kind of common sense..... a person that has a lot of friends is usually the one who isn't lonely. More people usually = less loneliness or aloneness.

Such is also the case with people that have a lot of sex. It's usually the sex hound that has a large social circle and talks to people often.
Click to expand...

me too agree
 
U

user deleted

Guest
OceanMist said:
I understand what you are trying to say, I just disagree with it. Hence, you feel like I'm not "understanding" you.
Click to expand...

Maybe, yeah. I don't really mean to come across the way I do sometimes, and I often think that I haven't been clear enough when I say something (hence my posts tend on the longer side) which I then obsess over and become frustrated. I don't actually mean to be a jerk.

Also I think that we're approaching things from different gender perspectives. For example, the women I've met who have a lot of casual sex differ from the men I've met that do that. Neither is better or worse, just different.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top