Thundercats
Well-known member
Hi and welcome smile-b-happy
Hello future friends,
My name is Katie :] I'm 20 and have been dealing with social anxiety since middle school. Not many people realize the pain I'm in during every conversation because I hide behind humor. I crack jokes so that no one suspects that I'm self-conscious. I spend hours every day planning out every possible social interaction; I constantly wonder if the people around me think I'm stupid. Many people think I have naturally rosy cheeks; they don't know that my cheeks are burning with embarrassment even though I'm laughing at a really good joke.
Much like any person with social phobia, I have my vices. Along with humor, I hide behind books; they transport me to a different world where I don't have to feel judged. I also smoke a lot of weed because it loosens my inhibitions and makes me feel more comfortable in my surroundings.
2 years ago I got kicked out of college. I never went to class because I felt so uncomfortable being around all of those strangers (I puked on 2 different occasions, barely making it to the bathroom). It was a huge blow to my ego; I felt worthless because I had allowed this disease to consume my life so much. I failed 3 classes and tried to end my life; thanks to my stranger room mate, I'm still here to talk to you today :]
Through all of this, I'm still very proud of myself. I've made a lot of changes in 2 years and I'm so proud of all of my accomplishments (no matter how minor). I've realized that I am not invincible and that my mind may in fact be a little more fragile than the average person's. I challenge myself more and more every day so that I can work towards getting back to school and ultimately having a better life :]
My goal in life is to have a family of my own who I can be myself with 100% of the time. Anyway, that's basically my life in a nutshell, hope to get to know all of you better :]
Hello future friends,
My name is Katie :] I'm 20 and have been dealing with social anxiety since middle school. Not many people realize the pain I'm in during every conversation because I hide behind humor. I crack jokes so that no one suspects that I'm self-conscious. I spend hours every day planning out every possible social interaction; I constantly wonder if the people around me think I'm stupid. Many people think I have naturally rosy cheeks; they don't know that my cheeks are burning with embarrassment even though I'm laughing at a really good joke.
Much like any person with social phobia, I have my vices. Along with humor, I hide behind books; they transport me to a different world where I don't have to feel judged. I also smoke a lot of weed because it loosens my inhibitions and makes me feel more comfortable in my surroundings.
2 years ago I got kicked out of college. I never went to class because I felt so uncomfortable being around all of those strangers (I puked on 2 different occasions, barely making it to the bathroom). It was a huge blow to my ego; I felt worthless because I had allowed this disease to consume my life so much. I failed 3 classes and tried to end my life; thanks to my stranger room mate, I'm still here to talk to you today :]
Through all of this, I'm still very proud of myself. I've made a lot of changes in 2 years and I'm so proud of all of my accomplishments (no matter how minor). I've realized that I am not invincible and that my mind may in fact be a little more fragile than the average person's. I challenge myself more and more every day so that I can work towards getting back to school and ultimately having a better life :]
My goal in life is to have a family of my own who I can be myself with 100% of the time. Anyway, that's basically my life in a nutshell, hope to get to know all of you better :]