How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
^ This is pretty much how I feel about myself. Especially within my own family. :sad:
FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
My kidney stone ached all day yesterday, three-and-a-half months now and it still hasn't passed. The pain got so bad that I eventually had to take one of my pain meds and a couple of sleeping pills just to black myself out.
defiance
Well-known member
Damn man....sorry you are going through that kind of pain. Hope you feel better soon.
I'm sorry you have to deal with that - especially within your own family. It seems like you live in a very tumultuous environment - that can't be good for the psyche. I really hope things get better for you, Graeme.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
No, it's indeed not good for the psyche. But that the environment I grew-up in. The only male sibling, and the youngest. Two older sisters. With the middle child being a terrifyingly violatile, prone to loud, violent verbal outbursts. The eldest is a know-it-all. And our mother is militant, radicial feminist, who despise me cuz I looked like my father. And they (my mum n' dad) had quite an abusive relationship, or so I've been told. But as they say: Sins of the father... :sad:
Here's hoping. Though, in fairness Sarah, I've been waiting for the past 15 years for things to change. But my family seem content to pass the buck and blame me for just about everything. Even when they've wronged me, they won't admit responsibility. :thumbdown:
But once my older sister's divorce is finalised and she moved back outta the family house, things should settle. But there will be words exchanged between me, my mum and my eldest sibling. And angry words at that..
I mean, I got yelled at by my older sister the other day for simply asking her to calm down as she was shouting at our mum and oldest sibling, and in the process got me out of my bed earlier than I intended. Then I overheard her lying to our mum saying that I told her to shut up. When I simple ask if she'd calm down, and if she noticed that she's shouting. Yet, I'm the one who's constantly accused of being inconsiderate. :kickingmyself: :idontknow:
theslowesthand
Banned
I think she got angry at you, due to being already anger at the others. And when angry, people in general i think are more sensitive to criticism/etc ... so she took what you said to mean 'shut up & stop being silly' (or sth like that). Rational doesn't always work when somebody is being irrational/emotional.
theslowesthand
Banned
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way.
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way.
Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain.
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today.
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you.
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.
So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again.
The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.
Every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time.
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over,
Thought I'd something more to say.
You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way.
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way.
Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain.
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today.
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you.
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.
So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again.
The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.
Every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time.
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over,
Thought I'd something more to say.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
That's true, and I totally understand that. But I never meant it that way. I was more concerned with the neighbours hearing. As the house I share with mum is a semi detached house. And, as well as neighbours next door, there's a block of a small flats just across from us.
And if I hadn't come downstairs and attempt to defuse the situation, our mum probably would've pack her bags n' left. Which would've got a "Well-f*ckin'-done!", followed by a well by a scathing, swear-a-thon of a rant of what I've had to put up with since we moved house. Because they seem to forget I exist whenever the older sibling argue. And my mum n' I feel caught in the middle most o' the time, cuz we're trying to resolve the conflict. Though, I was thinking about having them go at it, UFC-style in the back garden? :question: Cuz I don't want my family appearing on a shite tabloid talk-show... again.
So what if it happened again? Since my older sister is known for these shouty, angry outbursts. Everytime she comes to visit she'll find something to argue about. My eldest sibling and I used to make a joke of it, singing the chorus to the Kaiser Chiefs song, I Predicted a Riot, once my mum told us the middlechild was coming to stay for a few days.
But I digress...
My poor mum's already been brought to tears cuz the way my older sibling goes off on these irrational tantrum-like rants. Aye, I know, we tend to be more sensitive to criticism when angry. But my older sister wouldn't even hear us out, and just played the victim. Like mum n' the eldest sibling did with me, whenever I'd call them out for being rude or talking down to me. Cuz they aren't great at taking responsibility if they're the ones who are wrong.
Though, my mum did acknowledge, when it was just us in the house that - unlike my sisters - an argument with me ends once I get an apology. I don't dwell on it asking: "Why did they say that? Whit'd they dae that fur? Why're they like that?"
Rant over
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theslowesthand
Banned
FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
Kiwong
Well-known member
More relaxed, much more relaxed. That is a relief. I've been in some dark places this last 15 years.
Physiology and diet is helping. Deep diagphramic breathing, mindfulness exercises= smiling minds app. Grounding techniques. Diet - reduced caffeine, tangellos= vitamin C lowers cortisol, chamomile. Meds- effexor, I put this off for over a decade, but I was really losing the battle, and was desperate for relief. I don't know if the damage is already done, but a reprieve from those 24/7 overwhelming thoughts is a blessing..
I was laughing and smiling at my situation as parlous at it has been. My attention turning to all the plans I had which where drowned out by my anxious mind.
Physiology and diet is helping. Deep diagphramic breathing, mindfulness exercises= smiling minds app. Grounding techniques. Diet - reduced caffeine, tangellos= vitamin C lowers cortisol, chamomile. Meds- effexor, I put this off for over a decade, but I was really losing the battle, and was desperate for relief. I don't know if the damage is already done, but a reprieve from those 24/7 overwhelming thoughts is a blessing..
I was laughing and smiling at my situation as parlous at it has been. My attention turning to all the plans I had which where drowned out by my anxious mind.
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theslowesthand
Banned
I've got a "nothing" life. And there's no end in sight. FAACK!!!!!!!!!!. :thumbdown:
'Now that my life is so pre-arranged, i know that it's a time for a cool change' :question:
'Now that my life is so pre-arranged, i know that it's a time for a cool change' :question:
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Have they been on tv??? :question:
:shyness: Eh, aye. Ma auntie and a cousin, if I remember correctly. They appeared on this show:
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Though, that's put me in a good mood, pal. Thanks.
AtTheGates
Banned
im SO pissed off right now over this. even if it IS propaganda, this is just another example of them using children to further their agenda.
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/isis-video-features-boy-who-says-he-s-american-son-n795291
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/isis-video-features-boy-who-says-he-s-american-son-n795291
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Pissed off. :kickingmyself: :thumbdown: