Why Are Social Guys So.....

[MaliceInWickedland]

Cocky? Rude?? Difficult???

Seriously, I feel like a pile of maggot s*** right now.

The one time a really cute guy takes an interest in me and everything goes to piss because I'm such an insufferable idiot...

What happened was, yesterday I was supposed to meet up with a friend at the local theater to watch part 1 of HP7. After waiting for her for about an hour, she didn't show up and gave me a call, saying her father wouldn't let her meet up with me afterall because it was raining and he didn't want her driving in the rain. Things she could have told me to begin with......... But that's only a small fraction of my frustration.

So I decide to skip out on the movie and find someplace to sit in the mall, text my mom to pick me up, and wait for her. I find a small sitting area, sit on one of the couches, and wait for God-knows-how-long all by myself until this random but extremely cute guy sits across from me.

Being shy little me, I keep my eyes glued to my cell phone screen so I don't have to make eye contact with the guy, but I could feel him staring at me like I was from Mars or something along the lines of that. It became like a pattern: he would look around and watch people for a bit, stare at me, look at people, stare, look, stare, and so on. Suddenly he says:

"Are you really that caught up in yourself that you don't acknowledge a guy who's interested?"

I look at him in surprise and struggle for words, not knowing how to reply. When I finally speak, I kinda stuttered and felt like an even bigger idiot.

"N-no, I'm just really shy and I don't know how to act around guys."

The guy just kinda laughs and says:

"Well that's great, I just wasted 5 minutes of my life on a f****** zombie." and he walks away. Just like that.

As if I didn't hate myself already, this guy pretty much sank my self-esteem back down to absolute zero.

Did I do something wrong? Yeah I knew the guy was staring at me but I thought it was because he thought I was weird or something, which I'm used to people thinking about me. I had no idea that he was "interested in me". I've never had a guy tell me he was interested in me of all the abominable girls in the world. I just didn't know what to do and how to act.

Is it really that bad a freaking crime to be shy today???? I'm so sick and tired of this s*** happening to me. I might as well grow up to be one of those old women living with a million cats in her house if that's how guys are going to see me.

*Sigh* Sorry.. I just really needed to vent my frustration somehow. It's been bugging me nonstop since it happened yesterday. I apologize for sounding so emotional and hateful but I'm so annoyed with myself at the moment that hating myself is now my top priority in life.

Well anyway, thanks for reading, and once again I apologize for being over the top. It was just one of those things, you know? ::

 

[Interzone]

What a douchebag. He wasn't worth your time anyways.

 

[Danfalc]

I know you said you don't really care right now,but I hope you don't mind me adding my two pence.

Did I do something wrong???

No not at all.Maybe the guy mistook you not being able to hold eye contact and stuff for you not being interested.And people obviously can't read mind..but you flat out told him your were shy.The way he responded was horrible and rude.

Tbh the way he approached you was kind of rude,like he expected you to fall at his feet because he decided to spare you his attention.He sounds like a total douche.I mean it's kind of rude to just stare at someone...it would of been a little different if he had approached you and made an attempt at conversation.I mean his comment..

"Are you really that caught up in yourself that you don't acknowledge a guy who's interested?"

I mean is he really that self absorbed that he thinks a person will stop everything there doing,and rush over to talk to him just because he is gawping at them.

Please don't make yourself feel bad over this,he really sounds like one of those guys who think's he is gods gift to females.You did nothing wrong,he just got arsey because his ego got damaged

 

[Blaze]

He's one of the ignorant people, don't let him bother you.

 

[Feathers]

LOL!!

Malice, face it, your an attractive girl, you know!!

You just got a compliment today!!

I think you really shocked this guy and he really had no idea how to deal with it or respond to that!! lol!!
Maybe he just thought you didn't like him/weren't interested and that you used it as a line to get rid of him lol!!

I fumbled with bad lines in the past and had guys interested in me think I'm insane too lol, so welcome to the club!!
It just boosted my confidence anyway - and it can boost yours too!!

Hey, you've just been picked up in a mall - and quite possibly by a cute - and attractive - idiot!!
What could be worse? You could get him to ask you out and marry you and find out he's an idiot then!!! OoO

Other options: he was a player and just wanted to get you into bed asap - maybe he has experience that shy girls don't 'jump into bed' so easy??
(Maybe he thought you were really experienced and could teach him something - maybe he doesn't have a clue himself??)

Or, he could have had an 'assignment' (in which case he was a PUA apprentice!!) and HAD to deliver these two lines to every girl he chatted up?? Or the next ten girls or so?? Or those who don't fall into his arms immediately, offering cell-phone numbers and life-long commitment?? uhh!!

Anyway, good riddance!!

Maybe try to come up with a scathing say-back for any other time you might see him, to make him sorry what he lost?? he he..

Like, 'He he, have a shy girl phobia, eh?' I think you really shocked him with your genuine reply!! He must be soo used to girls fawning all over him or something??

GO MAlice!!

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

I know you said you don't really care right now,but I hope you don't mind me adding my two pence.



No not at all.Maybe the guy mistook you not being able to hold eye contact and stuff for you not being interested.And people obviously can't read mind..but you flat out told him your were shy.The way he responded was horrible and rude.

Tbh the way he approached you was kind of rude,like he expected you to fall at his feet because he decided to spare you his attention.He sounds like a total douche.I mean it's kind of rude to just stare at someone...it would of been a little different if he had approached you and made an attempt at conversation.I mean his comment..

"Are you really that caught up in yourself that you don't acknowledge a guy who's interested?"

I mean is he really that self absorbed that he thinks a person will stop everything there doing,and rush over to talk to him just because he is gawping at them.

Please don't make yourself feel bad over this,he really sounds like one of those guys who think's he is gods gift to females.You did nothing wrong,he just got arsey because his ego got damaged

Not at all, I'm actually glad you decided to add your two pence. That's some really good input you have there, it really made me think and reconsider the whole situation.

Thank you dearly, you really helped me out a great deal

 

[Danfalc]

Thank you dearly, you really helped me out a great deal

You really have nothing to feel bad about,so your more than welcome!

Like Feathers said,maybe even try and see the few positive things In it,yeah he was a jerk but it doesn't change the fact a total stranger found you attractive enough to try and approach

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

LOL!!

Malice, face it, your an attractive girl, you know!!

You just got a compliment today!!

I think you really shocked this guy and he really had no idea how to deal with it or respond to that!! lol!!
Maybe he just thought you didn't like him/weren't interested and that you used it as a line to get rid of him lol!!

I fumbled with bad lines in the past and had guys interested in me think I'm insane too lol, so welcome to the club!!
It just boosted my confidence anyway - and it can boost yours too!!

Hey, you've just been picked up in a mall - and quite possibly by a cute - and attractive - idiot!!
What could be worse? You could get him to ask you out and marry you and find out he's an idiot then!!! OoO

Other options: he was a player and just wanted to get you into bed asap - maybe he has experience that shy girls don't 'jump into bed' so easy??
(Maybe he thought you were really experienced and could teach him something - maybe he doesn't have a clue himself??)

Or, he could have had an 'assignment' (in which case he was a PUA apprentice!!) and HAD to deliver these two lines to every girl he chatted up?? Or the next ten girls or so?? Or those who don't fall into his arms immediately, offering cell-phone numbers and life-long commitment?? uhh!!

(Or he had a shy gf who was bad in bed and was afraid he wouldn't be able to bring you to happiness too?? Which was probably his own fault in the first place anyway?? I hope the mods don't get cross with me for saying that!!) I'll edit if I have to.

Anyway, good riddance!!

Maybe try to come up with a scathing say-back for any other time you might see him, to make him sorry what he lost?? he he..

Like, 'He he, have a shy girl phobia, eh?' I think you really shocked him with your genuine reply!! He must be soo used to girls fawning all over him or something??

GO MAlice!!

Okay, now I'm finally getting a laugh for today and yesterday. Very nice input you have there Feathers ::

The only thing I'm going to disagree with, out of sheer low self-esteem, is the part about me being attractive. I personally and honestly don't find myself to be attractive. I can't even bear to look into a mirror because I always find flaws about myself.

People tell me I'm attractive but I really find it hard to believe. Call me stupid or whatever but I can't help it, I just see myself like that. It's very different to have people online give me a compliment and say I'm attractive compared to a person in real life tell me that I'm attractive. They both make me equally happy but it just doesn't feel the same.

Regardless of my input on myself, I really appreciate everything you said in your post. Thank you a billion times over Feathers, I really mean that

 

[BlueDays]

I know you said you don't really care right now,but I hope you don't mind me adding my two pence.



No not at all.Maybe the guy mistook you not being able to hold eye contact and stuff for you not being interested.And people obviously can't read mind..but you flat out told him your were shy.The way he responded was horrible and rude.

Tbh the way he approached you was kind of rude,like he expected you to fall at his feet because he decided to spare you his attention.He sounds like a total douche.I mean it's kind of rude to just stare at someone...it would of been a little different if he had approached you and made an attempt at conversation.I mean his comment..

"Are you really that caught up in yourself that you don't acknowledge a guy who's interested?"

I mean is he really that self absorbed that he thinks a person will stop everything there doing,and rush over to talk to him just because he is gawping at them.

Please don't make yourself feel bad over this,he really sounds like one of those guys who think's he is gods gift to females.You did nothing wrong,he just got arsey because his ego got damaged

Some good advice there!!
...miss the rep system already!

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

You really have nothing to feel bad about,so your more than welcome!

Like Feathers said,maybe even try and see the few positive things In it,yeah he was a jerk but it doesn't change the fact a total stranger found you attractive enough to try and approach

I'll keep that in mind, thanks again

 

[WriterChick3]

He sounds like a jerk.

If he was really that interested he would've come over and actually spoken to you; Being stared at by someone isn't exactly comfortable, even a snobby guy would know that. Why would he even think staring at you was gonna make you feel flattered? Personally I would have felt weird and done what you were doing - staring at an object in hopes they'd stop.

 

[Feathers]

lol, glad to make you smile

The only thing I'm going to disagree with, out of sheer low self-esteem, is the part about me being attractive. I personally and honestly don't find myself to be attractive. I can't even bear to look into a mirror because I always find flaws about myself.

People tell me I'm attractive but I really find it hard to believe. Call me stupid or whatever but I can't help it, I just see myself like that. It's very different to have people online give me a compliment and say I'm attractive compared to a person in real life tell me that I'm attractive. They both make me equally happy but it just doesn't feel the same.

Regardless of my input on myself, I really appreciate everything you said in your post. Thank you a billion times over Feathers, I really mean that

Okay, well, you'd look prettier without hands growing out of your mouth!! ::

Actually, you know, not being attractive could save you from soo many things, like attractive but-idiot-guys approaching you in malls and such!!
I find that visually, good-looking people tend to gravitate toward other good-looking people, so even this sorry excuse for a human today had proved this theory!!

Maybe you have distorted views of what 'attractive' is? Like brainwashed into 'only Barbie girls are pretty' (uhh?)
I had a roommate who said 'Wouldn't it be boring if we all looked the same?' And she was soo right!! Wouldn't it be boring??
Even if we all looked like Barbie dolls, huggh?? Imagine Danfalc looking like a Barbie doll?? Or vj or EasySkanking? Isn't it much more better that we are in all shapes and sizes??

(She was a bit chubby but soo much fun to be with, and taught me how to be more talkative etc too, just by observing!)

So, yeah, the world ROCKS with very different people being in it!!!!!

 

[Anti Matter]

The guy is a total c*nt. Probably has major insecurities himself. Tbh the guy needs his head kicked in.

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

lol, glad to make you smile



Okay, well, you'd look prettier without hands growing out of your mouth!!

Actually, you know, not being attractive could save you from soo many things, like attractive but-idiot-guys approaching you in malls and such!!
I find that visually, good-looking people tend to gravitate toward other good-looking people, so even this sorry excuse for a human today had proved this theory!!

Maybe you have distorted views of what 'attractive' is? Like brainwashed into 'only Barbie girls are pretty' (uhh?)
I had a roommate who said 'Wouldn't it be boring if we all looked the same?' And she was soo right!! Wouldn't it be boring??
Even if we all looked like Barbie dolls, huggh?? Imagine Danfalc looking like a Barbie doll?? Or vj or EasySkanking? Isn't it much more better that we are in all shapes and sizes??

(She was a bit chubby but soo much fun to be with, and taught me how to be more talkative etc too, just by observing!)

So, yeah, the world ROCKS with very different people being in it!!!!!

Hahaha that's not me in my avatar! I found it online somewhere and thought it was awesome so yeah ::

But anywho, I can't really imagine Danfalc Or EasySkanking or any of those people as Barbie dolls, but I get what you mean lol

Very good point, thanks again

 

[just wanna b normal]

wow guy was an a**hole you deserve better...

 

[Section_31]

he sounds like a complete @$$hole....you deserve so much better then that, and if he was really worth your time he would definitely know how to properly speak to a girl....

Hes not worth your time.

Oh, and on behalf on men, i would like to formally apologize for any wrongdoing, and immediately commence reparations in the form of starbucks and chocolate!

 

[AGR]

Well not saying you did anything wrong,but I dont think its a good idea to say to a guy who is interested in you that you are shy and dont know how to act around guys first thing not everybody will respect that,maybe when you really get to know him then you do tell,you should have gave an excuse if you werent interested,like sorry I have a boyfriend or if you were interested say sorry I was caught up in my mobile,I know that in the heat of the moment is hard,when this happened to me I pretended I was asleep::,but they were underaged girls,then she said to her friends:
Wake up to life!
I think he is married.
And then they went away.

 

[KiaKaha]

If he had any sensitivity or manners he wouldn't of acted like such a tool. I know it made you feel bad, but seriously...its all him and you don't need to beat yourself up over what happened. He is a jerk.... he did you a favor by walking away.

 

[Minty]

Projection. He thought you were self-absorbed because he is. Staring is rude, period. He's so proud, he felt like he didn't have to put in work to get your attention. As if saying "hello" is that much work anyways.

Honestly, when total douchebags insult me, I feel good about myself. Because whatever they consider to be "good" isn't my definition of good and what they hold to be not worth their time is usually what I admire.

Also, one thing is pretty clear. Guys like this don't notice girls who are less than beautiful. I hope that makes you feel a little better.

 

[Aussie_Lad]

Sounds like the guy was probably just as bored as you, and was looking for some entertainment. Your response to him wasn't what he was expecting, so he decided to cut the strings, and give you some feedback as to why he was doing so.