What do you avoid?

[ApplesauceIsGood]

I avoid everything where I might have to have an actual conversation with someone. Sure, I can handle talking to the couple really good friends I've had for years, and my counsellor (since they get paid for it and have to keep confidentiality) but other than that, I avoid it all. Dont even like phone conversations. Been paying for Internet for 3 months after moving, just because I don't want to call and cancel.

The thing that is most exciting to me is drag racing my car and I have a completely competent car for it. But I don't want to go to my local track, because people might criticize my car, or say things about me. I don't want people saying things about the thing I'm most proud of in th world, as it's pretty much all I've got.

My biggest dream is to go to pripyat, to see chernobyl. I was totall set on going there this summer, but i won't go now, since I'll probably have to talk to someone when I'm there

 

[Kiwong]

Shopping centres
Restuarants
Service Stations
Chemists
Newsagents

Anywhere people begin to notice my anxiety. The town I live in frustratingly small like that. I go place until I'm know and then I move on. I'm probably well known as the weird anxious guy.

 

[StandingJelly]

being with people

 

[positivechange]

I avoid things that, in my mind, involve a risk of failure.

-I avoid searching for a job because I view my seemingly futile efforts as failures.
-I avoid social situations, because I fear rejection and ostracism, which I have equated with failure.
-I avoid revealing parts of my life to others that would make me feel vulnerable. I especially don't like to talk about my reclusiveness.
-I avoid embarking on self improvement: things like meditation and learning new skills. I think this is just procrastination and maybe not related to AvPD.


I'm aware of how irrational my behavior is. Yet most of the time I still choose to repeat it. Whenever I do the things I avoid (except for socializing which is tough), I feel much better. I'm happy to say that I've had some triumphs, however small, that make me hopeful for the future though.

 

[Foxface]

I often avoid going out, especially downtown becuase I often see attractive girls, which is my weakness. Seeing girls, so lucky, have a good life, have everything I want, like freidns, a best friend, social skills, often have good looks, are easily accepted (by most people).

If I have arrends to do for my Dad, I do them anyway, but it takes me a few minutes to prepare myself for the world. I try to look away when I see someone attractive, becuase it hurts me. I wish I was them or wish I could be with them.

I avoid social situations.

I avoid showing any kind of weakness. When I go out, I show no emotions at all. I change my character, I often speak with a British/Australian accent, I find it more accepting. I find people accept me a little more.

I avoid being around a group of people.

When people come over to the house, I usually hang out in my room.

I wear my Walk To Walk For Autism short, thinking that people will see it, and know I'm on the Autism spectrum, or at least think I am. Hoping it will give me a little respect. It hasn't really done anything, but it's one of the few good shirts I have.

I have a black shirt, I wear occassionally.

 

[Sup Phyl]

I'm the same. I avoid using the telephone, going out anywhere where there may be people, at my job I never stop working or moving around so no one has an opportunity to talk to me. I'm ultimately scared of people because of the way they make me feel about myself.

 

[MikeyC]

I avoid spiders. The more we're apart, the better.

 

[GhoulsNightOut]

-making phone calls

-restaurants with waiter service

-small talk with cashiers

-asking for directions

-my family members except for my older sis, the only rational one in the family

 

[Nathália]

I avoid spiders. The more we're apart, the better.

Oh jeez, that is another reason why I stay up late because they love to make nest around me and drop into my bed. I have braids, so one night I woke up punched myself in the head and it was my hair, darn spiders turning myself against myself like that. 2 points for them -1 for me. (Keeping score b****s)



I avoid 90% of life, so I can relate to almost everyone on here.

 

[angelcat]

1. phone ringing, don't ever answer it
2. sales people/clerks
3. plumber/home repair guy
4. just about everything that involves people

 

[psych]

I avoid things that leave me looking bad, or out of my element.... Generally anything that involves sweat, messed up hair, or discomfort of any kind....
Unless we're talking pursuits of a more carnal nature.

I'm going camping tomorrow... Intentionally putting myself into all sorts of discomfort.
Because, I like a challenge... & Because sometimes that's what you've gotta do to feel alive. Embrace the discomfort.

 

[JuiceB]

Phone calls - I never answer the phone unless I recognize the number and I never order out. I rather order pizza online.

Small talk - Even if I didn't stutter badly I'd avoid it.

Large crowds - If I have to go shopping I go depending on how empty the parking lot is.

Family - Only my older sister understands me. (Same as GhoulsNightOut) And my mom thinks I'm gay. Why? I don't know but she is getting old.

Oh jeez, that is another reason why I stay up late because they love to make nest around me and drop into my bed. I have braids, so one night I woke up punched myself in the head and it was my hair, darn spiders turning myself against myself like that. 2 points for them -1 for me.

I had a similiar situation years ago but it was rats, not spiders. Texas rats.

 

[1BlackSheep]

I avoid things that leave me looking bad, or out of my element.... Generally anything that involves sweat, messed up hair, or discomfort of any kind....
Unless we're talking pursuits of a more carnal nature.

Haha, I'm totally like that too! ::

I'm going camping tomorrow... Intentionally putting myself into all sorts of discomfort.
Because, I like a challenge... & Because sometimes that's what you've gotta do to feel alive. Embrace the discomfort.

You're a brave soul! My idea of roughing it is a Motel 6. Good luck and hope the campsite has showers and electricity!

 

[Labyrinthine]

I avoid spiders. The more we're apart, the better.

Oh goodness yes. All day, every day.

I also avoid failure. As a result, I avoid a lot of things since I'm so scared of failing.

 

[FlashGit]

I avoid rooms that have more than 3 people in them.
And talking on the phone because of my stutter.
And all the normal social interaction stuff.

 

[jryden]

Big crowds, small crowds, anywhere with people really.

 

[mikebird]

The type of people I thought I had settled with are ravers. Any weekend party involving deep electronic music enough to feel physically loud, with bass in the belly, and strong wind in your head. During the seasons, in a dark warehouse at night, or in the open all day - beach, hills, forest, across €urope. It's pure beauty & pleasure

Office atmosphere struck me like a cruel axe in the face that there were no such people. Life all about suit and tie, prim dress and stiletto & makeup. Posh. Fruit tea drinkers. Best conversation you ever get is 'how are you'? Clash of culture. An office has NOOOOOO culture

Once on a snowboarding trip in northern France which I loved, and plenty of drum & bass nights in snow resorts, I bumped into a seasoned skier who was a firefighter. That's the kind of person I like. Non-office person. He said "are all the people in your office women now?" He was right. The prim & posh airhead type, where my boss would spend her day playing with her handbag, filing her nails, watching me work, and one day she left with everything to do, while she took her maternity holiday.

I followed just fine. That was OK. A straight 10 years in different offices, enjoying the weekends well. Ticking over a reasonable income.

There was a flick of the switch once, when every new person, bunch, open office pod, I was prone to stares. There's no compromise. No acceptance. Pure rejection. No word; just once glance, and I get head-down attitude from them

'he's a freak on a different planet'. Worlds collide

A world of rejection is where I live. On phone to recuiter

Hmmm. Life in the army is what I wanted. Too old; no chance. I'd take police. But just one step wrong in law - no chance.

But now I think... Firefighter!!

 

[Foxface]

Girls (especially the most attractive ones)
Going out (a lot)
Posting, putting my input becuase of my lack of communication skills, I often make a mistake, mis-explain things, and people often take advantage of that, and I get hurt.
Wearing clothes, becuase I hate clothes. I hate the feeling of wearing them wearing clothes when you don't need to is just stupid. It really amazes me how people become so uptight about nudity. Nexst thing, people will be requiring for animals to wear clothes (wouldn't surpirise me).
Trying to act myself, pretend to be normal.
I talk on my cell phone and act like I'm on a mission or something. It's stupid, and sometimes I regret it, becuase it makes the situation even stupider, but at least, it dosen't show my true emotions, and people often don't mess with me. The phone is my defense mechanism.

That's all for now.

 

[odetoanoddity]

I'm avoiding my friends currently.

I've been invited to a lot of parties and catch ups, but I've been avoiding phone calls, replying to messages on Facebook and I've actually disabled wallposts, so that no one can write on my wall. A couple of weeks ago, I was supposed to do a speech at my friend's 21st, but I avoided her for weeks prior to the event just so that I wouldn't be asked and given the invite details. I didn't want to go because I wouldn't know anyone at her party, and I'd be in a position where I'd have to do a speech in front of a hundred people I didn't know... that thought made me very anxious :\ but it is also very selfish, because it's not about *me* it's her special day and I missed it, and she'll probably not want to talk to me anymore...

I have also avoided other friends, because I want to avoid the question "what's been happening with you?" - the answer to that is: hardly anything. I have crippling SA, which has impeded on me going out there and living my life. This makes me feel ashamed and I feel like if I *do* tell my friends, I fear they will consider me to be some kind of FREAK. I also feel different to them now.. Not accustomed to social situations anymore, I just don't know how to interact with people my own age (since my social interactions are limited to my parents and my boyfriend - who are all older than me.)

I've been such a terrible friend anyway, they can do better than me and they deserve a friend that doesn't have these freaking issues to contend with <-- this, I think, is another reason to avoid them. Avoid them from myself.

---

I've also been avoiding looking for a job, because it just freaks me out... working with people that possibly might not like me, and depending on the job, interacting with all sorts of different people on a daily basis. Generally, I tend to avoid responsibility and obligation... anything that ties me down and corners me... but running away isn't good in the long run.

 

[Subpop]

Well, I avoided my engagement party when I was 24. I freaked out and couldn't leave the house.
I didn't attend my Uni graduation ceremony.
I didnt attend my Mums funeral
I have attended five social events in possibly the last 10 years.
I stopped seeing my Psychiatrist in 2001.

I avoid all social situations. However, I am able to reliably attend work and do enough to keep my job.

I avoid trying to learn new things that I want to learn because I fear failing

However, I am seeing a counsellor tomorrow. I need to try and start to find what is blocking my growth and enjoyment of my life.