The Future... :/

[fitftw]

I'm really worried about it. I'm 26, haven't had a job since June 2009, and I have no people skills whatsoever. I am graduating community college next semester for Business and have no idea what to do in order to get a job.

The worst part?

I don't want a job. I see everyone waking up early to go to work and coming home when it's dark out. That is the most depressing thing to me. What's the point of living like that?

Sometimes I want to take my life savings, all $1,100 of it, and go to Atlantic City and walk up to the roulette table and put it all on black. If I win, it would probably be the happiest day of my life.

Anyone else feel like their future is screwed? I feel like I'm going to end up homeless and just die on the street somewhere in the next 5 years.

 

[Section_31]

I definately feel that way, though not exactly the same.

In my case, im working full time, and its not enough to survive. My wife, who has severe SA, is in school for 2 more yrs. She has no idea what she wants to do, 2 degree's or not, and the thought of working scares her. Shes trying to get help for it, but im not sure how its going to turn out. Ill support her no matter what, but theres more to it then that.

With society the way it is now, the expectations of certain accomplishments being done by such and such an age, being held against our generation by many (not all) of the previous generation, in the economic times that we live in, make things seem bleak indeed, and all of this one top of what many SA sufferers have to deal with. It doesnt seem like theres a light at the end of it. The enviroment is messed up, the economy is tanked, cost of living is rediculous in many area's, the expectation of the "american dream (owning a home, living on your own very early in life)" just doesnt seem to be realistic for many of us. All this, and Anxiety.

Just doesnt feel like a fair shot.

I honestly try not to think of it anymore, i just keep my head down, live day to day, try to save ewhat i can, and hope for the best. My dad is super supportive, but i know he wont be around forever. I start to think that way, and i begin to feel scared and afraid for the future as well.

Anyways, just my 2 cents. in short, i feel the same.

 

[vitalis]

Yep, same for me, it seems people with SA have an added trouble when looking for a job, apart than the financial crisis.

I have a job right now, and although I don't like it much, I'm rather independent on it (since I'm alone dong my tasks and I'm smarter than my boss) so I've managed to organize my work more or less the way it gives me less trouble with my SA issues. But the sad part is that I can get unemployed any of these days, and I'm really lost about what to do after that.

I don't know if it can be interesting for any of you, but as a personal ideological note, after a long period of inner introspection I started to become interested in the degrowthist movement; for now I haven't get involved, but I plan to contact with some local communities I know when I get jobless, I'll have nothing to lose I guess. Plus, I think this can be a good way to try to self-solve my SA issues, apart from trying to find a better future in all aspects, now that the "old order" is falling apart and it seems the current economical and social ideologies are becoming obsolete.

 

[Pookah]

If you can find a tolerable job with a certain amount of freedom....one that you at least like I think it will not be all bad. But most jobs make us wage slaves and its no wonder so many people are depressed.

 

[fitftw]

there is nothing I enjoy doing, and that's the problem. I'll never like any job. I like cars, but only my car. I like hedgehogs, but only my hedgehog. I like videogames, but I don't want to make them or write about them.

 

[Aussie_Lad]

To find a job you like (that won't feel like a job), you need to find your passions. To find your passions, you need to ask yourself a simple question.

If you were given 5 million dollars, what would you spend it on? What charities would you give to? Would you travel, if so where? What local places would you visit? The answers you write down, will give you some idea of what like, and what you are good at. You will be almost able to form some sort of personality profile from this. Then reasearch what jobs are available within those areas that are similar to what you wrote down on your list. When you have a list of careers written down, then see which ones resonate most with you.

 

[missjesss]

First of all YOU DO HAVE SOCIAL SKILLS you just have social anxiety they are 2 totally separate things and secondly the best thing you can do is to even get a job on the check out facing ppl to get you started in facing your fears also being on the checkout is an easy job Ive done it myself ... you will start to get kind of used to ppl aswel then you can move up

 

[Section_31]

Listen to the cutie--Listen to Jess!

>.>

<.<

 

[kihira]

I don't want a job. I see everyone waking up early to go to work and coming home when it's dark out. That is the most depressing thing to me. What's the point of living like that?

I used to think just like this, there are different ways of working, its not all 9-5, and even if it is it can feel good anyway - confidence - money to spend - meet interesting people - develop skills. It can be all a nice ride, so don't automatically assume the worst about it

 

[lunaticbinge]

My mindset is exactly like yours. I constantly worry about becoming homeless and think that it will most likely happen again someday. The messed up thing is that I might actually prefer it to being around people at a job.

 

[fitftw]

I lived out of my car for 3 months back in 2004, from September to the end of December until I had no money left to eat off the dollar menu and went home. There was green stuff on the bottom of my right foot that hurt and itched real bad but it went away after a while of moving back home. It sucked, but I never really complained or asked for money from anyone. It's going to happen again, I can feel it. And this time I may just jump off a bridge before it gets real bad.

 

[Luke1993]

First of all I want to say that I share your fear, I have never had a job before! And I do worry that I'll never have one. But it seems that I'm a bit different to you, in that I do want to work and have a job.

I would take almost any job come to think of it! I have applied for numerous jobs but no success (yet!). But when I turn 18 next March I will do volunteer work (need to be 18 to volunteer because of certain laws) so that I can get job experience and possibly build up people skills.

Anyway enough about me. Now I could be wrong on this, but I remember you saying you were once in the Armed Forces! Did you enjoy that? Could you rejoin perhaps? Sorry if I'm thinking of someone else....

Perhaps go for a job that has varying shifts? That would add a little variety I suppose.

Oh and well done on reaching 1000 posts! You are now one of the Elite users!

 

[Ignace]

First of all I want to say that I share your fear, I have never had a job before! And I do worry that I'll never have one. But it seems that I'm a bit different to you, in that I do want to work and have a job.

I would take almost any job come to think of it! I have applied for numerous jobs but no success (yet!). But when I turn 18 next March I will do volunteer work (need to be 18 to volunteer because of certain laws) so that I can get job experience and possibly build up people skills.

Anyway enough about me. Now I could be wrong on this, but I remember you saying you were once in the Armed Forces! Did you enjoy that? Could you rejoin perhaps? Sorry if I'm thinking of someone else....

Perhaps go for a job that has varying shifts? That would add a little variety I suppose.

Oh and well done on reaching 1000 posts! You are now one of the Elite users!

At least you applied for a job. I never even attempted to get a job before. :: I convinced myself to get a job in the vacation last year, but when the time was there ... this one, chickened out.

 

[fitftw]

Yes I was in the armed forces, Navy to be specific. I pretty much hated it. I just knew that I had no other choice, and at the time I was enjoying seeing the world, it was the one thing I ever wanted to do. So now I've done that, seen more than most people ever will, and I feel like there's nothing left to do. The only reason I go to school is because the gov't pays for it and pays me to live in this apartment. But that's going to run out in a year.

I could re-join active duty, but I really don't want to do that.

The only thing that keeps me from being anxious for a little while is going to the gym. I feel good lifting heavy weights, and I feel good for about an hour afterwards, and then my mind slips back into thinking that everything is pointless.

 

[Felgen]

First of all I want to say that I share your fear, I have never had a job before! And I do worry that I'll never have one. But it seems that I'm a bit different to you, in that I do want to work and have a job.

I would take almost any job come to think of it! I have applied for numerous jobs but no success (yet!). But when I turn 18 next March I will do volunteer work (need to be 18 to volunteer because of certain laws) so that I can get job experience and possibly build up people skills.

Anyway enough about me. Now I could be wrong on this, but I remember you saying you were once in the Armed Forces! Did you enjoy that? Could you rejoin perhaps? Sorry if I'm thinking of someone else....

Perhaps go for a job that has varying shifts? That would add a little variety I suppose.

Oh and well done on reaching 1000 posts! You are now one of the Elite users!

Try an employment agency. They'll usually send you to places where some passive-aggressive, narcisistic @sshole rules, but at least it will give you experience enough to get a new job when that time comes.

 

[Rembrandt Broam]

If you can find a tolerable job with a certain amount of freedom....one that you at least like I think it will not be all bad. But most jobs make us wage slaves and its no wonder so many people are depressed.

Very true. We're all just selling our time to the highest bidder, and unfortunately that's a commodity of which we have a very finite amount. ::

 

[Unrequited]

I don't have much hope for my future any more. I did until recently... I have a very close friend who, until a few weeks ago, was more than just a friend, but then she got bored of me. Or maybe she met someone better but doesn't want to hurt me by rejecting me so now she just mostly avoids me... who knows.

As for a job, I'm really going to have to see what happens when I finish college next June. I could work as a mechanic in a garage with the college qualification, but I'm hoping I'll be able to build a career from home instead. I'm training to be a freelance proofreader and copy-editor and if I end up successful I'll be able to work from home and decide my own hours - and, most importantly, not have to be around people all the time! I'm really hoping that works out.

 

[blackgatescross]

I worry about the future. I worry where I will be in twenty years time and what kind of person I will be.

I have a job and have managed to survive the recession. However, it is not really what I want to do, as I have no idea what I really want to do with my life. I am a 28 year old boy and I work to live not live to work.

The people that I know and work with all have their own lives. They are travelling, getting married and having children, basically getting on with their lives, whilst I am on my own struggling to make it through each day. All Kiwis go to London, I have been their once and with my condition I would really struggle to live their.

I worry that in twenty years time I will still be alone and flatting. I am so self conscious and trying so hard to keep up with others in life, but I have come to the sad realisation that I cannot.

I am terrible at relationships, have very few friends and never had a girlfriend. My grandmother thinks that I am going to settle down in the next couple of years and have a family with nice home, a white picket fence and a dog named Skip.

If she knew the truth about my condition, she wouldn't be so pushy.

Sorry to ramble, but it is just hard (life) you know. . . ::

 

[doubleM]

man i feel the same way. im 29 about to be 30 and i fear ending up alone, getting old, feeling like a complete waste of life. i graduated nearly 6 years ago from community college. got a 2 year degree in electrical engineering...which turned out to be not much help. i got alot of rough trade, manual labor jobs. jobs that i did not fit in at all at. all the people i have worked with at those types of jobs are backstabbing garbage...im like wtf i went to college for this crap??
i spent alot of times not having a job, it was miserable and boring.

so i went back to school, this time to a university to get my bachelors. ive been back and forth, but now im in mechanical engineering and i think im on the right track. i still dont know specifically what i want to do with it. i love to build things and work with machines.
i hope this time it really pays off and my education will help me get a good job doing what i like, not digging ditches or flipping burgers. i fear that it wont work out and ill end up an old man working in a fast food restaurant.
my future became really important to me recently. once you find something you really enjoy and can make money doing it, to me thats heaven on earth.

 

[Feathers]

fiftw, have you been in combat? Could it be some PTSD? Have you gotten any help for it? Or at least tried EFT or TAT...?
Lots of people who were in armed forces have PTSD or come back home changed... One woman wrote: 'I got home a different husband'...?

Other than that, I can relate to a lot of what you write too... I remember having sort of a 'regular job phobia' in high school already... And my Mom was always soo stressed because of work etc... Maybe you have had bad examples from your relatives too? It might help to see some people who enjoy doing what they do, and still have great lives, and may have some more unconventional careers?

Would you have discipline enough to start your own biz or non-profit?
Maybe good to start making connections now already, for any jobs or biz opportunities? (You could probably meet cool people in the gym too?? Get to know them, ask where they work/what they do.. Ask if anyone needs a hand with any work or such?)

You could also figure out what it is that makes you angry (for me, it's trash and incinerators and unsustainable living/eco problems etc) and then figure out what ways you could 'fight' against it... what talents and preferred activities you could use to help make good things happen?

The world has lived so unsustainably that now 'the bubble has burst' - and it's normal to worry and be scared... Previous generations in Europe and USA have behaved soo wastefully... The Baby Boomers were really SPOILT in some ways, already!! (Some even admit that!! Though many think that 'our' new youth generations are 'spoilt'...)
We must really change our ways if we want to have anything left for the generations after us too... and even for us, who are now relatively young..

I had to look up 'degrowthist' - looks interesting... The world DOES need to become more sustainable!! There are a lot of career opportunities within the green/sustainability movement too!! For example, people need to design more eco-friendly products, houses, ways of living, ways of making money & living good lives... Some people on this site have sort of 'green jobs' already... There will be many more, I believe...

Also, worst comes to worst, you could go work as a volunteer at an organic farm or something like that, and at least have enough to eat? Or get your own garden/plot of land to at least grow some veggies or such? Or marry a farmer bride? (Or sugar mama? )
In the old times, people lived and worked on farms, there was some hard work, and some good times too... Many say those were 'happier times'... (It was not all good, we can learn from the past & the present though..)

Many people say that people in Afria or Asia who have 'nothing' are some of the happiest people they know (??) You could even go live in a low-cost country and be 'rich' with your money? And maybe find or start some non-profit or biz or online work there?

Phocas, very inspiring!