running out of reasons to live.

Dr. Doom

Well-known member
i just dont see a point anymore. i think im going to finish up this winter break then just blow my brains out. i feel like any day now we are all just going to die. im always depressed. i hate everyone around me. i hate my teachers, others kids, older people, little kids. i hate all the liberals and conservatives trying to sell me thier ideas. i hate my mom and dad for divorcing and ruining my highschool life. i hate my social anxiety. i hate how stupid i am and pathtic i look. i just mope avoiding people. im always blushing and sweating and stuttering. its a really ****ty way to live. i hate these stupid commericials all the goddamn time. the cartoons arent as good when i was a kid. i find my self hating more than loving. im pretty sure i appeal to nobody. i hate myself and i want to die. im not even sure hwy i post this. i just want someone to know how i am feeling. i want to be asked without being scrutinized. i have no more goals. i just dont think i can live anymore.
 
Winter, Xmas. Not good times for many. When depressed people will see everything as grey, lose enjoyment in usual things, see no hope. Know that there is a way out and that a bright future is possible - you just can't see it yet. New enjoyments. Freedom from stuttering. Loving partner - all possible with help, action, self-belief. Start with two lists - what can I change? What can I not change? Put action to one thing on the first and start to accept things on the other.

Everything will be OK

:]
 

fitftw

Well-known member
I feel you Frank, or should I say Punisher. When I was in high school I was actually part of a mass suicide that was supposed to take place in Ohio but I never flew over there and I'm not sure if they went through with it. I don't think I could voluntarily just kill myself, as much as I sometimes want to.

How I feel 24/7
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4c-u-3b-nvI
 
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Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
Hi Frank, I know there is not much we can say that could possibly help when you feel this way, but just for you to know, high school and teenage years are really the worst. At least it was for me. I didn't know it was the worst back in the time, like you I just thought life sucked and wanted to die. But if you are strong enough to fight and survive and actually build something for your future and become independent, and find something that you would like to do with yourself, when you will be 20-30 years old, I'm pretty sure you'll be glad you're still alive.

(I assumed you are less than 20 and still in high school, I hope I'm not mistaken, if so I apologize)
 
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panicsurvivor

Well-known member
Come on man. I know how things can feel hopeless, but you can't give up. As dark as the world may seem sometimes, there is always something coming up around the horizon. You are far too young to have things set in stone for you. Things change, that is the one thing that is always sure in life. Nothing stays the same. There are many possibilities for your future, don't you want to see them before you forfeit them? I will tell you something that has worked for me and that I constantly tell people on here. Find some thing you like and hold on to that. People are always so keyed up about things that are expected of them by others, success, money, love, blah blah blah. **** that. Play some video games, watch some movies, whatever. Just do what you feel like doing. If you don't feel like doing anything, than find something. It doesn't have to be anything serious. Your too young for this type of thinking. PLEASE DON'T DO SOMETHING YOU CANNOT TAKE BACK.
 
if you are strong enough to fight and survive and actually build something for your future and become independent, and find something that you would like to do with yourself, when you will be 20-30 years old, I'm pretty sure you'll be glad you're still alive.

(I assumed you are less than 20 and still in high school, I hope I'm not mistaken, if so I apologize)

If he was strong enough don't you think he wouldn't have written that post?
You really think feeling that way, he's going to be able to hold his head up high and say,"yeah, I need to be independent, I need to be happy".
If life were that easy, no one would ever have problems.
Speaking from someone who is almost 30 and never found that independence or happiness, I don't think saying that is going to make someone feel better. I know you're trying to help, we all are.
Maybe others shouldn't take for granted the fact they actually have a life, even through bad times.

Frank, if you want someone to talk to, you can message me anytime. I do know, as well as you know, that suicide is never the answer for anything.
 

Section_31

Well-known member
I have to agree with Panicsurvivor

Frank, you say you want someone to know what your feeling, to ask without scrutinizing. Were all here for you, and we all care about you. What yuor facing is somthing i think the majority of us on here have faced, at least once if not more, some more than others. If you ever feel your going to do it, i just ask that you come on here first, and just vent, get it out.

I dont know you, i dont know what your story is or what your day to day life is about, but your another human being, and i do care man. Dont do somthing you cant take back.

You wont receive any scrunity from us. And i think alot of us can empathize with what your feeling.

Find somthing you like, even somthing small, and hang onto it. Dont let go, dont give up.
 

MsBuzzkillington

Well-known member
I have been suicidal on and off pretty much since Freshman year of highschool. I go through stages where it just seems impossible to go on and that there's no point.

I have accomplished some things and I have done a couple things that I am glad I got to do.

Sometimes when I am having really bad thoughts, I look over at my dog and think, wow if I killed myself 10 years ago I would have never got to "meet" this wonderful creature who has brought so much positivity to my life.

Or I will think of how I had a great teacher and if I would have died I would have never gotten to learn from them, I would have never gotten to know them as a person. I would have missed out.

There have been really crappy things that I have gone through, things have really sucked. They may not come along very often, but sometimes good things come along and I think about how lucky I am that I am still here to get the chance to experience them.

Sometimes it's something small like the sunrise. I think, if I killed myself I would never get to see something as beautiful as the sunrise ever again. I would never get to smell fresh cookies. I would never get to feel the warmth of a fire, or I'd never get to eat smores again.

It's extremely difficult to feel positive, I know... but you have no idea what good things are out there for you. And there ARE good things out there. You haven't given things a chance yet. One day some odd days, weeks, or years from now you are going to look back and think about how lucky you are that you chose to stick with it.


And to ToolSuggah, I feel like you are a little bit too negative in your post. It takes work and fighting to change your thinking habits, but it is possible. And it starts with "I need to be Happy and independent." Because happiness isn't just going to fall out of the sky into your lap. It's something you have to work for. Loving yourself is something you have to work for.

Life ISN'T easy, but it's not impossible either. It's a struggle, but anything worth having won't come easy.
 

fitftw

Well-known member
Sometimes when I am having really bad thoughts, I look over at my dog and think, wow if I killed myself 10 years ago I would have never got to "meet" this wonderful creature who has brought so much positivity to my life.

This is why I got my hedgehog. He's pretty much the only reason I care about my life for the time being.
 

da_illest101

Well-known member
i feel the exact same way as you frank, i simply don't get any enjoyment out of anything anymore, its been like that for at least the past 2-3 years. i just dont know anymore
 
The problem is i could never do the death dead. But often wish i could sometimes. Another day holds something new and exciting. Chin up mate.
 

Dr. Doom

Well-known member
ssssoo depressed. i hate myself so much right now. i cant stop looking at other people laughing and smiling and i hate them because they are happy. i have nothing better to do than to just play video games and watch movies. i have no freinds to do anything with.
 

fitftw

Well-known member
who needs them, Frank? Best solution is to not even bother trying anymore. Accept your destiny as a loner. It gets easier.
 

Feathers

Well-known member
Frank, it is normal to be depressed after holidays... Just accept it...
I'm staying away from alcohol, sugar and wheat/gluten and already feel better..

A LOT of people are just faking it, or may have problems but choose to just tell silly jokes instead.. Some of the 'passionate lovers' may split up or get divorced this year.. Some friendships may break.. New ones can be made..

If you have a warm room and games & movies to watch, that's quite a lot in comparison to some people..
What about people on Death Row, or prisoners, or ill... Think about less fortunate and maybe you'll see you don't have it so bad?

There's a whole new year ahead of you, you can meet many people in that time!!
What kind of friends would you like to meet? To do what with them? Where could you meet these people? It's doable!!
 

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
If he was strong enough don't you think he wouldn't have written that post?
You really think feeling that way, he's going to be able to hold his head up high and say,"yeah, I need to be independent, I need to be happy".
If life were that easy, no one would ever have problems.

Alright next time I'll just say "you're too weak so it's useless to even try"
 

Feathers

Well-known member
Hey Pacific & Shuggah, I think you were both trying to cheer Frank up, like the rest of us...

Shuggah, sometimes cheering people on can help.. And if they are younger, the idea of life being different in a few years can help..

Sometimes it doesn't all happen by the time you are 20 or 30 or even 40.. Know that song 'Sunscreen'? Some of the most interesting people REALLY don't have it all figured out by 40 or 50!! Some people like the McDonald guy got successful after 50 or so.. There's a singer who got successful in her 80s or later... (!!)

Also, strength is not always something you 'have' it may be something you find in yourself, while going through life, again and again... Finding that strength can be a process.. Even in fairytales, things don't magically all come true at the beginning of the story...

Sometimes 'the darkest hour is just before dawn' (may sound cheesy, it does help to think of it that way though.)

For me, the thought that it will be better is what gives me hope and strength (and it usually is and has been, I feel tons better than when I was 16, usually!!). There is still a lot of stuff to do, to live and learn...

So, let's just focus on the topic of this post - helping Frank, right?

We are different and different things may speak to us...

Pacific, I think it's great that you were trying to help Frank even if you felt you didn't know the right words...!!

Sometimes words from someone who cares can help even if they may not be the perfect words.. Especially if it's from a lovely blond girl.. :)

Sometimes 'reverse psychology' may work, but it may probably be better to say other things in situations like this..? Dunno really...

Frank, can you tell us how you've been? Any better now? Or worse? May take a few days for things to sort of calm down and get into a groove..!!
Even if you're depressed and have 'nothing to do' you still have friends on this site!!
We're all concerned & care about you here... and would miss you a lot!!
 
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DespairSoul

Well-known member
Hello Frank,

You are young Frank what if u will find everything little later what u are longing for?

What if u will have frends,girlfrend and feel much better as u do now? Keep fighting and be strong. Video games and movies this isnt so bad:) for sure u have a lof fun with it. U are healthy, u know how much happy will someone be if will have what u do? Think deeply about everything before u decide do something what u cant take it back.
 

WriterChick3

Well-known member
If you give up now you'll never find out there is something worth living for; If you die, you will be giving up any chance you have at making a difference and those you would meet in the future.

The only person who can make you happy and do things is yourself; I get the hating people thing if they have something you don't. But hating takes up too much time, wastes the time you could be spending doing something positive rather than focusing on those who are not perfect and may not truly be happy.

We can't spend time thinking we're all gonna die any day now; It's pointless to do so. There's no proof that'll even happen. It could be 50 years if something happens. Or 100. It doesn't really matter because we have to spend our lives just trying to be happy and believe in things, pushing ourselves to do things in order to succeed because nobody can do it for us.

I hope this made sence,
 
Hey Pacific & Shuggah,

....

Even if you're depressed and have 'nothing to do' you still have friends on this site!!
We're all concerned & care about you here... and would miss you a lot!!

Very well said. You seem to have, without fail, the right words.

Frank, not sure what I can say to help. When I am in a low state it only makes things worse when someone cheerfully states things will get better. All I want is better now which will not happen. Keep strong. If watching movies you enjoy, hang on to it. I go for music myself.

For some reason I keep going back to this one.
YouTube - Immediate Music - Serenata
 

Sea Bass

Well-known member
Forgive yourself. People aren't perfect. I you want, you can chat with me for a bit. I've done some stuff too.
 
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