Just go out and talk more

[Silentknight]

Does anyone else Hate when people say this to you? I find this phrase to be the most insulting thing to say to someone with a social anxiety disorder and I hear it all the time from the one person I call friend. Each time I hear it it's like a knife in my chest an insult to my intelligence if it were so easy no one would have this problem.

 

[socalledemo]

I agree. My brother says this to me even though he knows I have a problem. I really hate it.

 

[Iseesky]

It's so annoying! It's up there with "Why are you so loud? Come on...you talk way to much! *sarcasm* *haha I'm so funny*"

But, people who are 'normal' or outgoing just don't understand how it can be so hard for us. It makes sense even if it's hard to hear. It's easy for them and they don't understand how it can be difficult for everyone else. He/she is being egocentric.

 

[0dd1]

Have any of you asked someone who talks A LOT to stop talking? they can't do it. They HAVE TO KEEP TALKING! it's the same damn thing!

The next time someone says "stop talking" or "you talk too much" I will seriously punch them in the f***ing face-_-'

 

[Damaged]

Ah what annoys me is when my friends decide to talk to me or my mum talks to me they all say 'Just go out, think positive, mind over matter blah blah blah blah blah', they don't understand what its like to have a major panic attack trying to go out of the house, and I hate it.

 

[Iseesky]

The next time someone says "stop talking" or "you talk too much" I will seriously punch them in the f***ing face-_-'

You know...I don't support violence...But, if you did this, they'd learn so fast and think about what they're saying from then on! ::

 

[0dd1]

You know...I don't support violence...But, if you did this, they'd learn so fast and think about what they're saying from then on! ::

And hopefully the people around me will witness it and and avoid saying the same thing to me

 

[OPERA]

Don't worry, just go out and talk more.

 

[philly2bits]

They may mean well, but their lack of understanding on just what the problem is and how it affects you limits what advice they can give. Since they themselves have had no experience with SA, they can only give broad advice on the subject.

 

[FountainandFairfax]

That usually triggers maniacal laughter from me. Sometimes I'll raise my arms and look to the sky like they've just hit me with some life-changing revelation.

It's such an insult to insinuate that my problems could be so easily fixed. Am I that stupid that I never considered just talking more?

I guess they mean the best, but good Lord. Ha Ha

 

[lyricalliaisons]

I absolutely hate it. I especially hate it when I hear it from others on forums & sites who also supposedly have social anxiety. They should know what it's like & shouldn't judge, but it doesn't stop them from it at all.

 

[shy.girl]

Yeah my mom tells me that amongst other things like, "just grow up" or "snap out of it" :: It makes me feel like she thinks I am being childish and aimless. There is so much frustration loaded behind this "advice"

It reminds me of this:

"It is an easy thing for one whose foot
is on the outside of calamity
to give advice and to rebuke the sufferer"Aeschylus (Prometheus Bound)

 

[FountainandFairfax]

It's just ridiculous. I wouldn't tell an anorexic person to just eat more.

It's that thing where because we don't appear to have a big problem in their eyes, they assume that it can't be severe.

 

[Hellhound]

Most annoying thing ever. I know they mean well, but still... I can't help but feeling upset when they say that. I also hate it when they tell me to cheer up and be more positive.

 

[LadyWench]

People that don't experience anxiety (or any other mental condition, for that matter), are usually pretty ignorant to it. They can't comprehend that it doesn't just magically go away. It's a real disorder. I hate stupid, oblivious people. Their tiny minds don't get it.

 

[Richey]

yeh its like people say to me, just go and get a job aka a career/graduate job already as if its like walking down to a milk bar and buying an icy pole.....

even though i apply for pretty much everything i can in my spare time when i'm not working...they say it like its a piece of cake...perhaps it was for them..lol.

 

[mozart87]

of course it's stupid.
but you know, people that don't experience SA are very relaxed about everything. most of them are not interested in knowing more than strictly what they confront with so they consider us weird and that's why it's really hard for us to make new friend

 

[Falkor]

Everyone tells me this too..
But sometimes I believe it, because if you go out more, you will get used to it, and then you feel better because you did it a few times.
And the people who say this are ''rational'' they just think like just do it, and you will get over it.
They don't feel anxious when they do it, so they think there's nothing goin' on, but when they would experience this way, they would say the time as the rest of us. That we find it too hard !
But what is the real solvation to SA? Is it going out more, is it CBT, that question is stucked in my head.
and I will find out. Because I just need to know.

 

[mrb]

Have any of you asked someone who talks A LOT to stop talking? they can't do it. They HAVE TO KEEP TALKING! it's the same damn thing!

The next time someone says "stop talking" or "you talk too much" I will seriously punch them in the f***ing face-_-'

a chill pill is needed here in fact take a few just in case

 

[coriander1992]

It's so frustrating, just as helpful as someone being so very observant and saying "you're very quiet" yeah, thanks...