Is it really better to love and lose?

Confuseddd

Confuseddd

Well-known member
Im not convinced..

I just spent the last fourty five minutes reading old notes from my ex girlfriend. There were quite a few pages worth of writing.. It brought back emotions and feelings and memorys of times I can't even begin to describe on this post because I would never be able to type it all out. I don't remember why I kept the notes but I had just about forgot what they said when I stumbled upon them in the back of my closet. I don't even know if I love her still after all this time, maybe just what we shared. I plan on burning them next time I have a fire, I sorta wish I hadn't read them. I miss her like crazy, and its not like I can just try again with her. No, I don't see that as an option...
I truely loved that girl, and I thought that she truely loved me back. Some of what was in those notes made me feel like my heart was broken all over again. So is it really better to love and lose? right now im not thinking so..
 
WeirdyMcGee

WeirdyMcGee

Well-known member
I'd much rather have not been in love, ever. I imagine it would've been easier to imagine what it would be like and remain naive.
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
I'm not happy my heart was broken, but I'm happy that i was able to experience the overwhelming joy I felt before it was broken - even for a brief time.

The ancient sages advise that you should remain detached and free yourself from earthly attachments such as love if you wish to avoid suffering.

Many people interpret that to mean they shouldn't allow themselves to experience love.

What I think it means is that you should experience all that life has to offer - including the joys of love - but that you can also expect to suffer for it.

That's the balance.
 
Confuseddd

Confuseddd

Well-known member
coyote said:
I'm not happy my heart was broken, but I'm happy that i was able to experience the overwhelming joy I felt before it was broken - even for a brief time.

The ancient sages advise that you should remain detached and free yourself from earthly attachments such as love if you wish to avoid suffering.

Many people interpret that to mean they shouldn't allow themselves to experience love.

What I think it means is that you should experience all that life has to offer - including the joys of love - but that you can also expect to suffer for it.

That's the balance.
Click to expand...


Yes I see,
The question here is the suffering worth the experience?

This of course is very subjective to each individuals experience i.e not all people are the same. So the next question would be If one does choose to experience all life has to offer(also what exactly IS it that life has to offer? I would imagine to experience everything could leave you catatonic if not choosy in what you experience.) what might the consequences be for what he experiences?


WeirdyMcGee said:
I'd much rather have not been in love, ever. I imagine it would've been easier to imagine what it would be like and remain naive.
Click to expand...

That is something I am pondering at the moment.
To know love is so extremely powerful.. to have lost love is... indescribable..
I imagine it would be easier to imagine what it would be like and remain naive as well.
 
M

Minty

Well-known member
Yes because even though it's painful the whole process causes you to grow and evolve as a person.
 
Danfalc

Danfalc

Banned
Anomaly said:
Pure opinion -- toss a coin.
Click to expand...

Yeah agreed, it all depends on the person and the experience I guess. For me I prefer to of loved and lost than to of potentially missed out on something special.

Most of my relationships were nice experiences and I have even stayed friends with most of my ex partners. The odd relationship which didn't exactly go as planned well..I still don't regret them as I think it can be a learning experience..even if it makes you realize what wont work so you can avoid it in the future or you learn from mistakes.

heart ache or a bad break up is not nice, but the vast majority of people have to go through a few relationships people they finally meet the right person. So yeah I would prefer to end up meeting someone even if it means going through a few heart breaks, than growing old on my own and living with regret.
 
Kiwong

Kiwong

Well-known member
Loving and losing is all a part of life. And this is true not only for the realm of romantic love.

If you love someone of something: your home, your parents, a lover, a pet, your idependence, eventually you will lose it, and have to try to cope with grief of loss. I think it is worth the experience if you are lucky enoughfor that to come your way, however briefly.

Grief of loss is a hard human emotion to cope with, and it is something that we all face.
 
JamesSmith

JamesSmith

Well-known member
The only thing to learn if you fall in love and then lose it is that life sucks. With that being said, I don't know if I believe in love at all, actually. But, if love does exist, I want to be in it and experience it. So I'd rather have been in love and lost just because I'd want to experience love. Plus, I'm so used to not being in love, if was to fall in and out of love I'd have nothing to lose because I'd be in the same spot I am now, and I already know what being loveless feels like.
 
kihira

kihira

1
Its the nature of relationships to come and go, the concept of a single partner for life may work for a small percent, but for the rest of us it is pie in the sky that lands in our eye
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
phocas said:
Its the nature of relationships to come and go, the concept of a single partner for life may work for a small percent, but for the rest of us it is pie in the sky that lands in our eye
Click to expand...

serial monogamy,then?
 
dottie

dottie

Well-known member
i agree with citylights. you learn about yourself and others...

even though love, or what seemed to be love, very recently tore me apart.
 
Richey

Richey

Well-known member
sevenroses said:
Tough question. There are some people out there that really enjoy the single life.
Click to expand...

Yeah some people love being single but i think there are loads of single people who spend a fair amount of time each day craving a relationship but don't even know where to start.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top