Lorraine Manca
Well-known member
just think of the folks who'd do anything to get rid of their wife. im not even kidding. grass is always greener
I have never had a girlfriend in my life
- Thread starter rko74
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Enialis227
Well-known member
Yeah, but when you've never stood on grass at all, its kinda hard to look at things that way. But you are right, though.
iamthenra
Well-known member
Exactly how I feel... It would be nice to be given the chance to experience having a girlfriend and all the romance that goes with it, so that I can have an honest opinion of my own... Funny how allot of the people say that being married and having a romantic relationship isn't all that it's cracked up to be.... But I still would like to be able to experience this for my self.
addison8019
New member
I love it, I found this thread on a google search, then when I was wishing it was still valid, I went to the last page and it is!. It's been going since 2005!?. Anyway, I'm 31, and never had a girlfriend. I live at home still also. Reading through this thread has been like seeing my life written out before me. It's great to see I'm not the only ****ed-up loser, lol. It's not like I've never picked up a girl, or had one want to be with me, I just always seem to sabotage things on purpose, without really wanting to. Sub-consciously I obviously don't want one, but consciously I really do. It's just great to see I'm not alone 
redski
1
I love it, I found this thread on a google search, then when I was wishing it was still valid, I went to the last page and it is!. It's been going since 2005!?. Anyway, I'm 31, and never had a girlfriend. I live at home still also. Reading through this thread has been like seeing my life written out before me. It's great to see I'm not the only ****ed-up loser, lol. It's not like I've never picked up a girl, or had one want to be with me, I just always seem to sabotage things on purpose, without really wanting to. Sub-consciously I obviously don't want one, but consciously I really do. It's just great to see I'm not alone
The more I read these threads the more I think that you are right. I think I am too
sabotaging the potential relationship that I could have had.
The question is why? I really do not know.
dark_horse
Well-known member
I'm 34 and unmarried. This in itself raises a lot of questions i don't have answers for. Not in a relationship right now and have SA to thank for that. Relationships is pretty hard work with SA!
rayray
Well-known member
True,it would be nice to be given chance to experience this whole "teen love" thing while i'm young,I dont have any idea how to find girl though, i dont really go out of my house.
Few days ago,i started to talk with this cute girl from my school through internet,because .. oh,do i have to explain? you already know why, and it seems that she's not interested in me,like she answers my questions,but doesnt ask anything about me,but what do i know about girls,lol?
So i dont know if it's better with gf or being alone.
addison8019
New member
Good question, I don't know exactly, I suppose I just find ways to not go any further with the girl. I tend to clam up and act weird, and not return calls or go out of my way to chase them etc, when I know I should at least try, then I just end up kicking myself and hating myself even more
. That's me anyway, I'd be curious to hear other peoples opinions/experiences too
redski
1
I think I look up excuses or things that I do not like about the women and then
obsess about that and think negatively, SA kicks in, anxiety kicks in and then
I cannot get out of that thinking pattern and that is what I am expecting which in the end just makes it all bad.
A girl I was crazy about a while back said I am too negative. I think back now and she was completely right. I guess I sabotaged my chances with her also
I am staring to think that I am a cowardly fool sometimes and SA is what I have
to thank for that!
Good question, I don't know exactly, I suppose I just find ways to not go any further with the girl. I tend to clam up and act weird, and not return calls or go out of my way to chase them etc, when I know I should at least try, then I just end up kicking myself and hating myself even more
do you do that on purpose, to get rid of the girl?
SingleAloneForever
Active member
I've never had anything. I'm just very depressed today, and need to get this off my chest. I'm 27, still a virgin and it looks like I'm going to die that way. Single, lonely and terribly miserable.
Some of you others I know are in the same boat, however the difference seems to be that some of you, while never having been in a relationship, have at least had others show some sort of interest in you. I've not even had that.
I have tried everything to meet people. Internet, through friends, pubs/clubs, what more can I ****ing do?
I just can't wait for the day where I can die, and all this pain and suffering can just go away.
Another of my friends got engaged today. I was really excited for them, over the moon in fact. However, I felt bad at the same time. How I'm still single, and ALL my friends are either partnered or married/to be. Hell, some of them now even have kids. I mean, out of high school I am the ONLY person from 100 or so that were in my year, who's never been in a relationship. That speaks volumes about me, I feel. I seriously need to give up. So I will die alone, big deal.
****ing hell, I would seriously sell my soul just for one night - no.. even just for one hour - of what they have, and I don't mean sex. I just mean intimacy with another person, to have somebody to hold, to talk to, to watch them while they sleep.
**** this hurts too much.
Some of you others I know are in the same boat, however the difference seems to be that some of you, while never having been in a relationship, have at least had others show some sort of interest in you. I've not even had that.
I have tried everything to meet people. Internet, through friends, pubs/clubs, what more can I ****ing do?
I just can't wait for the day where I can die, and all this pain and suffering can just go away.
Another of my friends got engaged today. I was really excited for them, over the moon in fact. However, I felt bad at the same time. How I'm still single, and ALL my friends are either partnered or married/to be. Hell, some of them now even have kids. I mean, out of high school I am the ONLY person from 100 or so that were in my year, who's never been in a relationship. That speaks volumes about me, I feel. I seriously need to give up. So I will die alone, big deal.
****ing hell, I would seriously sell my soul just for one night - no.. even just for one hour - of what they have, and I don't mean sex. I just mean intimacy with another person, to have somebody to hold, to talk to, to watch them while they sleep.
**** this hurts too much.
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I think I look up excuses or things that I do not like about the women and then
obsess about that and think negatively, SA kicks in, anxiety kicks in and then
I cannot get out of that thinking pattern and that is what I am expecting which in the end just makes it all bad.
A girl I was crazy about a while back said I am too negative. I think back now and she was completely right. I guess I sabotaged my chances with her also
I am staring to think that I am a cowardly fool sometimes and SA is what I have
to thank for that!
yepp, story of my life. i was always told im negative, abrasive, hostile. i just wish i could get into your mind set of thinking negatively about the person to forget about them...cuz im usually the same, i think of all the cons about that person & try to not get too close, but then when he leaves me [& they always do, cuz of my fkn SA], i obsess over the guy... yet ik that its my own damn self-destruction that makes all my relationships go down the crapper
redski
1
yepp, story of my life. i was always told im negative, abrasive, hostile. i just wish i could get into your mind set of thinking negatively about the person to forget about them...cuz im usually the same, i think of all the cons about that person & try to not get too close, but then when he leaves me [& they always do, cuz of my fkn SA], i obsess over the guy... yet ik that its my own damn self-destruction that makes all my relationships go down the crapper
Self-destructive is another word I have heard and it was in regards to me, related to that girl I mentioned.
I am going to sound like a kindergarten kid, at least you have had relationships.
I haven't had a single one.
hun, youre only 27, youve got so much ahead of you. a lot of people say that after the storm, out comes the sun. i believe that there is someone out there for everyone. dont give up. NEVER give up.
tell me about it. i've been driving myself insane trying to understand why i cant get close to anyone..it just doesnt make sense..
my longest "relationship" was 2 months long. & it was controlling. & emotionally abusive. i stopped believing EVERYONE. & when i recently finally took a step into the normal world & against all my better judgement, decided to believe the guy, once again, i was controlled & emotionally abused. if you only knew how many times he told me that i'm not good enough, that i'm not normal, that i depress him & make him miserable, how he would be so much better off with someone else. i actually liked this a-hole. every single word was like a razor blade. i was miserable. its times like those that make me realize that even though at least i "had" it, it was worse than not having it. & it cant even be called a relationship when i simply cant handle intimacy of any kind, so people just leave. & that hurts a whole hell of a lot more than before i was alone. :
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DownInAHole
Well-known member
23 never been in a real relationship, have had chances but have either A) just don't pursue them B) find some reason why I shouldn't. I think of myself as self-destructive as well in many cases.
I look back year after year and always think..shit I should of just dated so and so to get the monkey off my back.
Funny thing is the other day my mom was looking at old pics of me in elementary school and was like you sure were into girls early weren't you.. because of all the pics w/ me and girls. I even had a couple pseudo g/fs then.
Can only think of what would have been w/o SA through my teen years.
I look back year after year and always think..shit I should of just dated so and so to get the monkey off my back.
Funny thing is the other day my mom was looking at old pics of me in elementary school and was like you sure were into girls early weren't you.. because of all the pics w/ me and girls. I even had a couple pseudo g/fs then.
Can only think of what would have been w/o SA through my teen years.
redski
1
Hey, I am really sorry to hear it. I am afraid of that actually. Given how I am withmy longest "relationship" was 2 months long. & it was controlling. & emotionally abusive. i stopped believing EVERYONE. & when i recently finally took a step into the normal world & against all my better judgement, decided to believe the guy, once again, i was controlled & emotionally abused. if you only knew how many times he told me that i'm not good enough, that i'm not normal, that i depress him & make him miserable, how he would be so much better off with someone else. i actually liked this a-hole. every single word was like a razor blade. i was miserable. its times like those that make me realize that even though at least i "had" it, it was worse than not having it. & it cant even be called a relationship when i simply cant handle intimacy of any kind, so people just leave. & that hurts a whole hell of a lot more than before i was alone. :
SA and all if my first relationship is like that I fear it may makes things worse.
I have a friend who is stuck in such a marriage with kids. Every time I see his wife
being a cold crazy bitch to him it makes me feel really bad for him.
recluse
Well-known member
I'm the same but 28. I could easily go to a hooker if i wanted sex but what i want is mutual loving. At the end of the day after being with a hooker or something you are still going to bed alone probably feeling lonelier than ever.
am 19 years old,never had a girlfriend,i don't know how to be close with a girl in real life,its ok through messages,msn and other things,but in real life it's hard for me i become shy,and don't know what to do,my friend's didn't know this because i don't know them very long and when they ask me i always lie,and then one day one of my friends that i didn't had a girl,and it was like he thinks that i can't have a girl and that hit me so hard,like punch in the face