How are you feeling?

[superfluouslyme]

^ Look at you, doling out all sorts of advice! Thank you. All is better. I took the dog for a walk and then talked the problems out.

 

[superfluouslyme]

Re: blehhh

over-affogatoed

I had to Google that. Well, I went to dictionary.com first, but that came up with nothing, so then I went to Google and they suggested "affogato," so now I know. Thank you for teaching me a new word today.

 

[kilojoule]

pissed off

I put on the water to go in for a shower and just as I'm about to head in, stupid ******* runs in ahead of me FOR HALF AN HOUR!!!! ****ing ******* **** head **** does this every single day!!!!! No hot water left grrrr I am 5 minutes in the shower!!! He takes 30-45 minutes every day! I made a point of going in switching on the water (even though I knew there'd be none) and then slamming the door and storming downstairs. Every single day!!!!! mutter mutter mutter angry what a ****head so glad the lease is up in a couple weeks mutter mutter the inconsiderate **** **** **** **** **** aaaaaaagh! selfish selfish **** head

He does this every single day, hes such a ****, always runs in ahead of you, now I have to go put the water on AGAIN and wait. What an absolute ****

 

[kilojoule]

I'm going to beat him with the toilet brush. 45 minutes?! He SAW ME!!!! I came down in my pjs switched on the water he saw me do it, I said hi, good morning and the ****er ran up the stairs and into the bathroom !!!! Who the **** takes a 45 minute shower anyway? He's new aswell, he doesn't know me well enough for this to be good natured rivalry! hes just being a bitch. And who does it when they hear someone else put on the water and knows that it's their hot water? who does it when they know someone else is waiting?1?!?! And who the hell does it when all of the above is true. AND WHO the **** does it every single ****ing morning!!!! I have been way toooo nice. I'm getting the toilet plunger to beat the shipe out of him with.

Such a ****** ******* **** ******** ***** ******** head.

 

[Graeme1988]

Overwhelmed by frustration. Depression is motherf*!%er! I feel I'm losing myself to it, losing my sense of humour too. Which is bad. I'm just in a crap mood all the time lately. I wish I had better family support, I really do.

I tried talk with my mum about it yesterday, and she overreacted. But that become the typical response to me whenever I try and open up about how I'm feeling. So, back to square one, there. Back to keeping myself to myself.

 

[twiggle]

Are you upset about that? If you don't like him now, I would doubt it, but is there a small part of you that thinks, "what if?"

I'm not upset at all, he's not really my type anymore but we still get on well. It's more just... interesting I guess. I can't say I'd want to be a parent at this age though ::

Hope you're feeling better today Mikey

 

[kilojoule]

So I finally go up to have a shower and the water goes cold just as I put the conditioner in my hair aaaaagh, so I get out march back downstairs to make a cuppa while I wait and he's in the kitchen!!!! I just looked at him and he said' oh theres only enough water boiling for one cup, queue my glare of death, standing there in a towel very angry with soap in my hair!!!! He offered up the boiled water (probably because I stared him out of it with the ol crazy eye). Waited donwstairs for water to heat up a bit and the ****er goes back into the bathroom for another 20 minutes and I hear the water come on again. I swear he needs a beating, a proper beating with the plunger, maybe ill use the plunger to get him out of the ****ing bathroom just stick it to his face, one of these days, I swear, I'm going to lock the bathroom from the inside and climb out the window and go off for the day, teach him a bit of manners. If he acts like a selfish pig he can use the garden like a pig....mutter mutter

 

[cowboyup]

Overwhelmed by frustration. Depression is motherf*!%er! I feel I'm losing myself to it, losing my sense of humour too. Which is bad. I'm just in a crap mood all the time lately. I wish I had better family support, I really do.

I tried talk with my mum about it yesterday, and she overreacted. But that become the typical response to me whenever I try and open up about how I'm feeling. So, back to square one, there. Back to keeping myself to myself.

Yup....I said to my sister in law the other day, "I am feeling so anxious lately..blah blah blah...told her of my feelings of depression too.
All I get was "what do you have to be depressed and anxious about"
..oh let me see, no job, live here with you and my brother, watch YOUR kid all day for 100.00 a month, uh guess nothing much! <-- and THATS what I wanted to say, but of course didn't have courage to say it.
bummer.
and I thought I could talk to her because she is a school counselor - at least in some way kind of get some insight. Da*n fraking people.

 

[Nanita]

So I finally go up to have a shower and the water goes cold just as I put the conditioner in my hair aaaaagh, so I get out march back downstairs to make a cuppa while I wait and he's in the kitchen!!!! I just looked at him and he said' oh theres only enough water boiling for one cup, queue my glare of death, standing there in a towel very angry with soap in my hair!!!! He offered up the boiled water (probably because I stared him out of it with the ol crazy eye). Waited donwstairs for water to heat up a bit and the ****er goes back into the bathroom for another 20 minutes and I hear the water come on again. I swear he needs a beating, a proper beating with the plunger, maybe ill use the plunger to get him out of the ****ing bathroom just stick it to his face, one of these days, I swear, I'm going to lock the bathroom from the inside and climb out the window and go off for the day, teach him a bit of manners. If he acts like a selfish pig he can use the garden like a pig....mutter mutter

Oh God, he´s acting so bad... I don´t know what I would do. Beating with the plunger, yes maybe?

 

[Lea]

I had a priceless afternoon today. I took some crappy stuff and it nearly killed me. The thing is I didn´t even know it would work. But I know a lot of people hate me anyway so it wouldn´t make difference.

 

[Porto]

I had a priceless afternoon today. I took some crappy stuff and it nearly killed me. The thing is I didn´t even know it would work. But I know a lot of people hate me anyway so it wouldn´t make difference.

Oh my god, what did u take? Is everything good now ?

 

[kilojoule]

Oh God, he´s acting so bad... I don´t know what I would do. Beating with the plunger, yes maybe?

Oh I plan on it, tomorrow morning I'll be ready. The thing is, I don't even think he does it maliciously he genuinely doesn't seem to see the problem. I know the other have had it out with him, he's just a bit stupid. Normally I would just go in at a different time but today he went in much later than he usually does

 

[Nanita]

Oh I plan on it, tomorrow morning I'll be ready. The thing is, I don't even think he does it maliciously he genuinely doesn't seem to see the problem. I know the other have had it out with him, he's just a bit stupid. Normally I would just go in at a different time but today he went in much later than he usually does

Hmm ahh yes I see, I can imagine the guy now, like a very unpractical person :: who doesn´t see the problems he creates for other people....

 

[Apersonalan]

pissed off

I put on the water to go in for a shower and just as I'm about to head in, stupid ******* runs in ahead of me FOR HALF AN HOUR!!!! ****ing ******* **** head **** does this every single day!!!!! No hot water left grrrr I am 5 minutes in the shower!!! He takes 30-45 minutes every day! I made a point of going in switching on the water (even though I knew there'd be none) and then slamming the door and storming downstairs. Every single day!!!!! mutter mutter mutter angry what a ****head so glad the lease is up in a couple weeks mutter mutter the inconsiderate **** **** **** **** **** aaaaaaagh! selfish selfish **** head

He does this every single day, hes such a ****, always runs in ahead of you, now I have to go put the water on AGAIN and wait. What an absolute ****

Hmmm this actually reminds me of my friend Heath, his entire family was all Irish and blonde and I would stay over and be the odd and funny one out of the bunch, they had this HUGE farm lots of acres and their shower was limited and so was their hot water as the pipes were just connected to a water tank so when I had to have a shower all the others had used all the hot water and I usually shower for a good 30 - 45 mins So I used their bath tub instead as it had some hot water left but it wasn't as closed as the shower was and the door had no lock! So I put trust in these people not to come in as they know I'm in and in the middle of bath time comes in this guy probably all excited with his yellow hair and stuff and he takes a pretty good look, my hands are getting all wrinkly too from covering up for so long

 

[KiaKaha]

So I had another Social Phobia Meet up today. 11 RSVP'D 7 showed up. I think it went pretty well... I am glad to facilitate and be part of something bigger than myself... something that helps other people and encourages them to grow. It makes me feel good. Its funny...most people cant see anxiety in me. I come across as "normal" I guess.... but that is only because I feel relatively safe. I am pretty friendly I think. I know haven't got it as bad as some people.... but put me in the right kind of situation where I am feeling left out or disliked.... then you can see just how far I can fall... I can crumble HARD and it takes me weeks to get over the tiniest trivial social faux pas.

*I always have this nagging subtle feeling that I am just so completely unlikeable, undesirable and worthless. That I am always doing something wrong. I cant shake it.*

 

[MikeyC]

So I went to Sydney yesterday and stayed overnight.

I was nervous and reluctant to go beforehand, because I would be spending a lot of time with one friend. Hours and hours. For those who know Sydney, we went to Bondi, pub crawled a few places down the main street, then took a taxi to Coogee Bay Hotel and stayed there until we went home.

It turned out well, to be honest. I was having fun and ended up getting drunk, against what I've been standing for, for the first time since September. The pubs we went to were good along Bondi. We went to one place and I got a vodka and orange juice, to which the guy ended up squeezing an orange and using that, instead of normal orange juice, and it was served in a wine glass. For the showmanship involved, it was the least tastiest drink I had all night. Strange how that happens. We were going to swim in Bondi beach, but that didn't work out as it was raining.

Coogee Bay was good. Went in, had a couple of drinks, then played pool. After that we went to a nightclub-like bit in the hotel. My mate eventually got kicked out for being too drunk, when I was obviously acting crazier than he was. It didn't make sense.

I had fun - more fun than I anticipated - but I can't help but feel that you have to look a certain way in a nightclub, whether it be how you look or how you dress, and I believe I don't fit either of those molds. My friend got approached by a girl, but I didn't. I can't identify what the problem is, but it's either 1. I don't look how I should, 2. I don't dress properly, or 3. I don't give out proper signals. It's strange: I can go to a nightclub no problem, dance without an issue, but I clam up and freeze if I try to approach a girl, or if a girl approaches me. How does that make sense? I'm not going to lie: I would love to make out with a girl on the dance floor. I really would. However, I don't think it'll happen for the three reasons I mentioned above. I did think about that on the dance floor, and it did make me a little bit sad, but it didn't ruin my night, thankfully.

Today I woke up with a hangover, stifled a vomit, and my friend and I went and got delicious Indian food before coming back home. Overall it went well. I think this friend is the one I feel most comfortable around, despite his power over me.

*I always have this nagging subtle feeling that I am just so completely unlikeable, undesirable and worthless. That I am always doing something wrong. I cant shake it.*

You couldn't be any more wrong, at least in my eyes.

 

[MsBuzzkillington]

Feeling sorta super sad and defeated in a way. Last night/yesterday was a pretty bad day/night, filled with lots of really bad thoughts and it was overwhelming. Gosh, I really really wish I had driven back up to Colorado on Wednesday like I had thought about. I wish I didn't wait.

____

Hey Mikey, glad to hear that you had a pretty good outing. As far as not getting approached by a girl at a club, it could be any number of different reasons. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it though, it has nothing to do with not being the right kind of person or looking the right kind of way. You are a great looking guy and you have nothing to worry about in that department. I'd say that it has to do with confidence mostly. If you want to make out with a girl at a club you have to be SUPER confident and aggressive, but not like overly aggressive. My friend showed me this youtube video of guys trying to get girls to make out with them in FRONT of the club before they even went in. They were able to do it, but it had a lot to do with game and their attitudes and how they acted. So if you want to get girls like that, in a way you have to play a game I think. It's more so playing that game than doing something right, if that makes sense. If you are constantly questioning yourself and how you look, that kind of thing can be picked up on.

Maybe dancing is kind of a safe zone, but as soon as a girl comes into the picture it moves into something "serious" and "real", you aren't in the bubble of the dancing/drinking/partying thing anymore. So it makes sense why that part is a bit more difficult.

 

[MikeyC]

Feeling sorta super sad and defeated in a way. Last night/yesterday was a pretty bad day/night, filled with lots of really bad thoughts and it was overwhelming. Gosh, I really really wish I had driven back up to Colorado on Wednesday like I had thought about. I wish I didn't wait.

Oh, no. What happened? ::

Hey Mikey, glad to hear that you had a pretty good outing. As far as not getting approached by a girl at a club, it could be any number of different reasons. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it though, it has nothing to do with not being the right kind of person or looking the right kind of way. You are a great looking guy and you have nothing to worry about in that department. I'd say that it has to do with confidence mostly. If you want to make out with a girl at a club you have to be SUPER confident and aggressive, but not like overly aggressive. My friend showed me this youtube video of guys trying to get girls to make out with them in FRONT of the club before they even went in. They were able to do it, but it had a lot to do with game and their attitudes and how they acted. So if you want to get girls like that, in a way you have to play a game I think. It's more so playing that game than doing something right, if that makes sense. If you are constantly questioning yourself and how you look, that kind of thing can be picked up on.

Maybe dancing is kind of a safe zone, but as soon as a girl comes into the picture it moves into something "serious" and "real", you aren't in the bubble of the dancing/drinking/partying thing anymore. So it makes sense why that part is a bit more difficult.

Hmm, yeah, you're right. I'm not aggressive and I can't be even if I willed myself to be. It's not in my nature. Maybe that's a problem. Nothing wrong with being aggressive a little bit as long as it's not exaggerated.

I don't know. I need a new game-plan. I need a new personality! At least you don't think I need a new physical appearance, though.

 

[1BlackSheep]

I need a new personality!

No you don't!!!

 

[1BlackSheep]

I am pretty friendly I think. I know haven't got it as bad as some people.... but put me in the right kind of situation where I am feeling left out or disliked.... then you can see just how far I can fall... I can crumble HARD and it takes me weeks to get over the tiniest trivial social faux pas.

I can totally relate to that!