BlueDays
1
What happened? ::
I'll just say, be careful what you wish for. For the rest of my life I am only ever doing things that can be easily undone.:
:
How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
I'll just say, be careful what you wish for. For the rest of my life I am only ever doing things that can be easily undone.:
:
MikeyC
Well-known member
I understand. If you need to talk I'm here.I'll just say, be careful what you wish for. For the rest of my life I am only ever doing things that can be easily undone.:
koyaanisqatsi
Well-known member
"Painful to live in fear, isn't it?" said Leon the Android in Blade Runner. How true, Leon. It's painful to get older too, but I'm "only" 61.
I've left clonazepam twice in the last 3+years w/o medical supervision. I live in NYS where that perfectly safe medication is classified as a controlled substance--so doctors are afraid to deal with it in any way. I still wonder why my new after the first taper country doctor talked me into going back on clonazepam...at least it worked reasonably well. Anyway, I seemed to manage the taper off OK...twice. I've recently started Nardil and it's begun to help. Nardil is really the only other med. that seems, based on a lot of experience, to help w/o really disruptive side effects. The dietary restrictions are mostly beneficial to me and I seem to have resumed a much needed weight loss. Phobia/depression, coupled with likely side effects of statins that mimic Alzheimer's, seem to be a major problem though less so as the Nardil takes effect. My sense of humor seems to have returned with the use of Nardil, though not everyone appreciates my "humor."
I live now in the small somewhat isolated town that I grew up in. A mistake to move back here for sure, as there are very few employment or social opportunities--not that I feel free to take advantage of social opportunities. Little diversity, and cold, snowy winters are the norm. But here I am...a person has to be someplace.
Just venting. I guess I'm feeling OK--just OK.
I've left clonazepam twice in the last 3+years w/o medical supervision. I live in NYS where that perfectly safe medication is classified as a controlled substance--so doctors are afraid to deal with it in any way. I still wonder why my new after the first taper country doctor talked me into going back on clonazepam...at least it worked reasonably well. Anyway, I seemed to manage the taper off OK...twice. I've recently started Nardil and it's begun to help. Nardil is really the only other med. that seems, based on a lot of experience, to help w/o really disruptive side effects. The dietary restrictions are mostly beneficial to me and I seem to have resumed a much needed weight loss. Phobia/depression, coupled with likely side effects of statins that mimic Alzheimer's, seem to be a major problem though less so as the Nardil takes effect. My sense of humor seems to have returned with the use of Nardil, though not everyone appreciates my "humor."
I live now in the small somewhat isolated town that I grew up in. A mistake to move back here for sure, as there are very few employment or social opportunities--not that I feel free to take advantage of social opportunities. Little diversity, and cold, snowy winters are the norm. But here I am...a person has to be someplace.
Just venting. I guess I'm feeling OK--just OK.
Starry
Well-known member
I feel depression creeping up and dragging me down again... The past few days I've been gradually sinking little by little and I'm back at the stage where everything seems too much effort... I planned to collect blackberries and make bramble jelly, but I keep putting it off and feeling that I just can't be bothered... I feel like there is so much to be done and I just don't have the energy to do it... I know the feeling will pass.. It usually comes on for a few weeks or a month and then eases off again for a while... But ugh...
MikeyC
Well-known member
I know this feeling all too well. Stay strong, Starry.
1BlackSheep
Well-known member
Ugh, I'm right there with you and wish I wasn't. :
: Hopefully it will pass soon for both of us!
MikeyC
Well-known member
Why do you feel nobody else will love you?Rather down
You just got out of a long relationship. Give yourself time to heal.
1BlackSheep
Well-known member
I can relate, that's for sure. :
:
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Procrastinating as per f**kin' usual. Which doesnae help ma depression at all.
DeadmanWalking
Well-known member
Rather down
Your signature says it all, Will: It gets better. Like Mikey said, give yourself some time to heal from this relationship. Even though you'll find love in someone else, you need to make sure that you love yourself too, because you deserve love from both others and yourself
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coyote
Well-known member
can i have one, too?
i feel great, by the way
but you'd know that if you hugged me =^]
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Feelin' ignored, but that's nothing new. Story o' ma f**kin' life, tae tell ye the truth. And just one of the reason I don't talk.
Though, I usually take the "Shut the f**k up" mentality with myself. And I partally f**kin' loathe ma Scottish accent. I really do, (or at least, am startin' to). Why, you may ask? Because, speakin' from ma ain (own) experience, naebody take ye serious, that f**kin' why.
I know the Scottish accent is great for comedic purposes, but not everythin' I say is a f**kin' joke. Though, it's usually treated as such.
Sorry, just really pissed off with certain family members at the moment.
Though, I usually take the "Shut the f**k up" mentality with myself. And I partally f**kin' loathe ma Scottish accent. I really do, (or at least, am startin' to). Why, you may ask? Because, speakin' from ma ain (own) experience, naebody take ye serious, that f**kin' why.
I know the Scottish accent is great for comedic purposes, but not everythin' I say is a f**kin' joke. Though, it's usually treated as such.
Sorry, just really pissed off with certain family members at the moment.
Srijita52
Well-known member
I'm sorry, ending a relationship is never easy. Of course, there'll be people who'll love you but you've got to give yourself a bit time. Right now, just concentrate on taking care of yourself. Things will get better eventually.Rather down
I'm glad to hear that.
Feelin' ignored, but that's nothing new. Story o' ma f**kin' life, tae tell ye the truth. And just one of the reason I don't talk.
Though, I usually take the "Shut the f**k up" mentality with myself. And I partally f**kin' loathe ma Scottish accent. I really do, (or at least, am startin' to). Why, you may ask? Because, speakin' from ma ain (own) experience, naebody take ye serious, that f**kin' why.
I know the Scottish accent is great for comedic purposes, but not everythin' I say is a f**kin' joke. Though, it's usually treated as such.
Sorry, just really pissed off with certain family members at the moment.
You're not a joke Graeme. So not one. Sorry people are getting on your nerves.
TheFlamesWithin
Active member
I'm in my mid 20s, and I feel like NOTHING has changed since I was a teen... my meds are doing jack **** for my Bipolar. I'm swinging like I'm not even on any... and now my own fiance is flinging me **** about "Oh you have things so easy, you need to buck the **** up! All you do is go to school, then you come home and do homework, help clean the house and thats it." Its like, excuse me, but I can't function!!! I am soooo sorry my issues hold me prisoner and that must grind your gears! **** you too! ::goes off and cries:: I HATE MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1BlackSheep
Well-known member
Thanks Phoenixx - much appreciated! I think I need to have an 11 1/2 hour sleep too because I feel mentally exhausted. All of the stuff I've been trying to put in the back of my mind seems to be coming back and hitting me like a freight train right now. Glad you are feeling better! Hope it continues for you.