How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Hating my job so much for so many reasons. Bad colleagues, stressful work, even nasty neighbours. Still need to suck it though because I really need the money and who knows if I changed job things might be worse. Not a good way to go through life but sometimes life gives you little choices. On the personal front things are just as tough. Not a single friend for nine years. Abusive and horrid men. Life's a blast.
Srijita52
Well-known member
That's amazing!! I hope you have a great time
I'm really sorry to hear that. I hope things look up for you, stay strong.
Shyangel
Well-known member
*Hugs* Sorry you're feeling that way Shyangel. :
Belly dancing and volunteering sound fun, that's a great way to start. Friends will come with time, perhaps joining some classes like that can open up opportunities. Feel better though.
Thanks, Iluv, your great. *hugs* I hope everything with you isn't going badly. I have start some where, I guess. I'm a bit scared to make the leap into one of these things. I'm afraid if it doesn't workout and I just look like an idiot wasting time. But I guess I look like more of an idiot doing nothing, and I am wasting time as is..So, the fear is a little silly. Thanks again, Iluv.
Heya, Mikey. ^.^ I read your feeling really good. I'm sincerely very happy for you. I truly hope you will feel like that always. Like you deserve.
Yeah, I'm very afraid to take on something and make it a hobby. What if I don't like it? What if the people don't like me? What if it changes me? Then everything will be more confusing. I'm so tired of all the inner turmoil making decisions causes me. This is way I hide away from everything. It hurts to much. I'm rambling a bit now. lol Anyway, thanks for listening and offering a ear. I appreciate it.
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MikeyC
Well-known member
Thank you. Today was a good day for me.Heya, Mikey. ^.^ I read your feeling really good. I'm sincerely very happy for you. I truly hope you will feel like that always. Like you deserve.
Yeah, I'm very afraid to take on something and make it a hobby. What if I don't like it? What if the people don't like me? What if it changes me? Then everything will be more confusing. I'm so tired of all the inner turmoil making decisions causes me. This is way I hide away from everything. It hurts to much. I'm rambling a bit now. lol Anyway, thanks for listening and offering a ear. I appreciate it.
You won't know about anything unless you try it. I started drumming years ago and I'm still going with it, but I may have stopped after a few weeks. I stopped playing rugby league after one year when I was 8. You simply don't know unless you try.
Why are you scared that it'll change you? Maybe you'll like it to change you.
Feeling_Nothing
Well-known member
Absolutely terrible...I can't seem to keep the one person I love in my life...
I've been reading your post and the previous ones before this one. When you really care about someone and your heartbreaks for them, I think it can be one of the worst feelings. Feeling , is there anything that you can do to subdue your hurt to a lesser place? I hope that you will be okay. From the very few post that you've made you seemed so sweet to that person. I think you made them something and you were so happy to see them. Sorry that things are not working out right now maybe I wish I could give you a dozen rainbows to calm the rain. I know it hurts but *Hugs*.
Feeling_Nothing
Well-known member
Thank you Beleza, sadly things are so complicated right now...I just don't know what to do with myself. Ive known her for quite some time...yet she is taken away from me. She didn't choose it herself so I'm sure she is a mess aswell yet I can't seem to stop thinking about her, all the good times we had and all the plans we had.
No I got noone to talk to, nothing to do to keep my mind busy and I'm slowly going crazy and feeling more and more lonely every single day. I can't sleep anymore without heavy painkillers and even then I can only sleep for 3-4 hours. I'm just so tired of everything and everyone...
MikeyC
Well-known member
Classic heartbreak. Time heals, though, and you will get through it. I got through mine so there's no reason why you can't get through yours, even if there were plans and such in place.
Feeling_Nothing
Well-known member
I know I will get over it, the question is how deep will I sink in my depression again...I have no friends, no family to talk to and no therapist.
My family just thinks I'm a shy guy and that I'm happy with what I got. I'm quite the opposite in fact, I WISH I had some real friends, not the kind that only calls you when they need a taxi. I WISH I could be the person I really am without putting a mask on. I WISH I could have that special person in my arms that loves me exactly the way I am.
Those are wishes, I know, if I don't go out and work for it they will never come. However every single time I try, I either chicken out or end up so dissapointed I won't leave the house for weeks...
MikeyC
Well-known member
Would you consider seeing a therapist? Maybe that'll help you out.
Maybe, if possible, you could tell your family that you're not happy and maybe they could help you out. A lot of people wish for that special someone in their lives sometimes, even little Mikey, and eventually you will find her.
Feeling_Nothing
Well-known member
Would you consider seeing a therapist? Maybe that'll help you out.
Maybe, if possible, you could tell your family that you're not happy and maybe they could help you out. A lot of people wish for that special someone in their lives sometimes, even little Mikey, and eventually you will find her.
I did 2 sessions with a therapist and I was really uncomfortable...I felt like my problems weren't worth a therepists time. After the second session (even though I'm considered an adult) she wanted to talk to my mom. I refused because here, especially my family, things like that are frowned upon. They will just think I overreact. I'm pretty much the outcast in the family, talking to them is not an option...anyways, I stopped seeing my therapist because keeping it from my family was to hard to do. Bills, insurance etc etc.
Can you open up to your family and let them in on what social anxiety is? Or is that a big no? Try to change some things and let things out. Even if it's only one thing, because yes, you are going to spiral into a deeper depression if you continue the pattern and don't break something. When you're in an intense moment, everything gets on your nerves. That's something inside of you, listen to your subconscious heart and mind. If things are getting to you, then try conquer them in a tactical way.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Lonesome. Apathetic. Indifferent. So, not great. ::
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Feeling_Nothing
Well-known member
Family is a big no, they wouldn't understand besides, I faked my whole being for years, so they wouldn't believe me anyways. To be completly honest, I havn't been "happy" in years, well not for longer then a few weeks tops.
I have come to the point that when something good happens to me, I reject it just because I'm afraid to get hurt again afterwards. People here aren't exactly the most social type, for example, If I'm somewhere alone I can asure you noone will talk to you, everyong here sticks to their groups of people they came with. Without any real friends I don't see myself breaking the current pattern I'm in.
MikeyC
Well-known member
Your problems, no matter how petty you think they are, are worth the therapist's time and attention so that thought should not even cross your mind.
Feeling_Nothing
Well-known member
I'm planning on moving out asap, already told my mom that as soon as I have some spare cash I'm moving out. I'll probably move to a totally different place aswell, start over and be the person I want to be.
Where I am now, I'm strugeling to hold my tears every single day because I'm afraid that they will notice I cried. When I have my own place I'll be much more comfortable and be able to see a therapist without having to worry about who will see the bills/insurance papers.