Lilyofthevalley
Member
Hi
I just joined today, mainly because I had a lousy night of panic over my huge "going out of my comfort zone" this thursday!
I am a huge swiftie ie Taylor Swift fan and so when I got an email to say she is going to England (my country, but live in France), I sort of casually said to my husband about it and there was silence, then he said: so why not go yourself and I am thinking: what the heck? I can hardly go to our bins without anxiety and he just comes out with that? I didn't argue, just panicked and saw a blank wall. Then miraculously, things cleared. You see, I don't drive and thus, things are difficult for me. Then I had in my mind: what about a coach and it went from there.
My best friend was going to join me, but something came up and so she couldn't and my other friend, is rather like me and so that was out. I then realised with horror that if I want to do this, I have to do it on my own and gradually, after searching those who go by themselves, I reasoned that actually, it is best that way, because I don't have to worry how I look in front of those I know - HOWEVER when on my own, I am soooo parnoid with what others think, it is awful just being on my own.
Well, after realising I could do it, my friend then said that I can go and stay a week with her and so I have made plans for that and further more, intending to learn to drive in my country!
I have an open ticket and currently, staying for a month and I am PETRIFIED.
I want to cancel, because I seriously cannot take this anxiety; wrecks my sleep as I am tossing and turning, thinking of all the disasters that could take place.
Basically, I am an utter IDIOT when out of my depth! I hate the ferries because I just cannot walk around like everyone else and as for eating, no way!
I am going with one suit case and a large bag, because being a foot passenger is no fun anyway and with the burden of items, a sheer panic for me.
I have run away all my life and know that if I run away now ie cancel, I will regret it for the rest of my life and so I have made up an itinery and the first on my list is my ticket and subsequently, each one that I use, leads to the next, so hopefully, I won't be all fingers and thumbs!
Brittany ferries contacted me and offered for someone to accompany me throughout the journey, but I declined because I figured that if I didn't particulaly gravitate to her, that would be a nightmare. I was also offered to swap my reclining seat for a cabin, which I turned down, for the last time I went, I did not leave that cabin and thus, need to be out there in order to gain courage.
To say I am frightened, is rather an understatement!
I just joined today, mainly because I had a lousy night of panic over my huge "going out of my comfort zone" this thursday!
I am a huge swiftie ie Taylor Swift fan and so when I got an email to say she is going to England (my country, but live in France), I sort of casually said to my husband about it and there was silence, then he said: so why not go yourself and I am thinking: what the heck? I can hardly go to our bins without anxiety and he just comes out with that? I didn't argue, just panicked and saw a blank wall. Then miraculously, things cleared. You see, I don't drive and thus, things are difficult for me. Then I had in my mind: what about a coach and it went from there.
My best friend was going to join me, but something came up and so she couldn't and my other friend, is rather like me and so that was out. I then realised with horror that if I want to do this, I have to do it on my own and gradually, after searching those who go by themselves, I reasoned that actually, it is best that way, because I don't have to worry how I look in front of those I know - HOWEVER when on my own, I am soooo parnoid with what others think, it is awful just being on my own.
Well, after realising I could do it, my friend then said that I can go and stay a week with her and so I have made plans for that and further more, intending to learn to drive in my country!
I have an open ticket and currently, staying for a month and I am PETRIFIED.
I want to cancel, because I seriously cannot take this anxiety; wrecks my sleep as I am tossing and turning, thinking of all the disasters that could take place.
Basically, I am an utter IDIOT when out of my depth! I hate the ferries because I just cannot walk around like everyone else and as for eating, no way!
I am going with one suit case and a large bag, because being a foot passenger is no fun anyway and with the burden of items, a sheer panic for me.
I have run away all my life and know that if I run away now ie cancel, I will regret it for the rest of my life and so I have made up an itinery and the first on my list is my ticket and subsequently, each one that I use, leads to the next, so hopefully, I won't be all fingers and thumbs!
Brittany ferries contacted me and offered for someone to accompany me throughout the journey, but I declined because I figured that if I didn't particulaly gravitate to her, that would be a nightmare. I was also offered to swap my reclining seat for a cabin, which I turned down, for the last time I went, I did not leave that cabin and thus, need to be out there in order to gain courage.
To say I am frightened, is rather an understatement!