Feeling depressed and lonely at Christmas Eve
- Thread starter ThePunisher
- Start date
Luke1993
Well-known member
Sorry to hear thatAnd why do you say that?
Because I'm too scared of socialising with people. Like if someone were to invite me to a party (Which they wouldn't, but let's say they do) I probably wouldn't turn up because I fear rejection, even though I really want to go there deep down. Sometimes I just think it's my own fault for not starting conversations, I have a few oppurtunities to but I never do because I think I'll be humiliated and laughed at.
Did that make any sense? Probably not lol
of it makes sense cause we all feel the same ; l
hidingfromtheworld
Well-known member
Yes,Christmas music is very sad. But ,its just sentiment. Its actually meaningless. Just remember that for most people Christmas is just about materialism and sporadic spending all in the name of Christmas. When you consider that its actually only about the birth of Christ you realize that there is nothing to be sad about. Commercialism makes us think that Christmas is about family,love/relationships,etc ,,but this is just a marketing gimmick to make billions. So try to see Christmas for what it is [or what its supposed to be] and then you wont feel so sad. Just dont play into it.
lunarla
Well-known member
Christmas songs actually make me feel nice. Especially covered ones. I also like winter in general for the most part. And although I could do without christmas, it's not terrible for me. Sort of nostalgic, and I love anything like that. I guess I'm a very sentimental person.
I can see what you're saying though, and I'm sure at some point you'll have someone nice to spend it with.
I can see what you're saying though, and I'm sure at some point you'll have someone nice to spend it with.
Kustamogen
Banned
I get sad about xmas because it reminds me Im getting all old and how I miss xmas as a kid.....plus all the friends that have moved away come visit and it makes me miss the old days when everyone was around
Lorraine Manca
Well-known member
actually that makes me feel loads better. its really just a fellows birthday. and he was a really unlucky guy to boot, destined to have his daddy hang him on a tree like an extra big christmas ornament and die a slow painful death. and i thought i had a rotten family, can you imagine when he got home to heaven? gee thanks dad, great plan!
maybe it aint so bad being lonely on the holidays afterall. it could be worse!
I kinda feel the same way. I'll be spending the rest of the year alone and probably all of next year as usualy cause I don't have family around..but I like being alone for the holidays..alone away from family and "friends" but I DO wish I had a boyfriend to spend the holidays with..I don't like being without a love life and having a special someone..
Noca
Banned
Exactly, relationships dont solve depression or anxiety. Ive had 7 and they never filled the void, though I may just not have found the right person I guess.
yeh, totally agree, besides this whole marketing_being very stupid_ never targets lonely people and they , or 'we' feel even more excluded from this whole stupid society of materialism ....
ThePunisher
Well-known member
Is this suppose to be a joke?
Even around people I sometimes..well actually most of the time feel even lonelier, or isolated.
Last year Christmas was great for me, this year Im not too much in the spirit because Im broke, bought Christmas presents anyway pushing me further into debt, so I kinda feel foolish...so this year Im not as into it.
I feel for you, and this time of year isn't always happy for everyone, some people get even more depressed during this time.
Last year Christmas was great for me, this year Im not too much in the spirit because Im broke, bought Christmas presents anyway pushing me further into debt, so I kinda feel foolish...so this year Im not as into it.
I feel for you, and this time of year isn't always happy for everyone, some people get even more depressed during this time.
ThePunisher
Well-known member
No, ofcourse it made sense
I know how you exactly feel. I use to feel the same way too about socialising, having that fear of rejection. Like whenever I went to a party I'd always feel like the lonely guy there. Most parties were depressing for me cause of that.
Well to be blunt, I think it is your own fault, but it's also there fault for not starting conversations with you. So it's 50-50 in a way. Conversations have to work both ways.
I know what you mean by fearing being humuliated and laughed at. I use to have the same fear and I still do at times, but at one point I just got angry, angry at my inability to initiate a conversation, angry that people didn't want to talk to me, and I used that anger to actually be who I wanted to be, say what I wanted to say, like I just snapped and didn't care anymore and funny enough I actually discovered how to initiate in conversations cause of that.
So I'd say it's pretty much trial and error cause you don't have much to lose.
But also surprisingly for me later on, I discovered I had something called Asperger's Disorder, which is a mental disability which affects the way I communicate and make sense of things. So it was actually the mental disability that caused my difficulty with social interaction. And I also discovered that there were some people like me, so I met up with them in a social group and I had that feeling I finally belonged somewhere.
What I learnt from that experience is that everyone belongs somewhere you just gotta search for that place and that you can't get along with everyone.
ThePunisher
Well-known member
also feeling lonely: no lover, no friend? family is not an option: I'd rather spend it alone like now rather than stay with my 'family'
Why is that if you don't mind me asking?
Juggalo
Well-known member
Relationships definitely don't solve everything. But as a (almost) 22 year old virgin who has never been in one, it can be very hard on one's sense of self-worth that nobody seems to find you attractive. Along the holidays like this, you just long for somebody to hold every once in a while. Sounds a bit corny, but its true. If you usually feel lonely the holidays can definitely magnify that feeling.
I've had a lot of other issues this year too. My financial situation has gone downhill(in poverty essentially for the first time in my life) and my grandmother who raised me died the day after my 21st birthday, last January. It doesn't help that this is my first holiday without her. ::
I've had a lot of other issues this year too. My financial situation has gone downhill(in poverty essentially for the first time in my life) and my grandmother who raised me died the day after my 21st birthday, last January. It doesn't help that this is my first holiday without her. :
:It's understandable to feel lonely on Christmas without having someone special to share it with. I hate going to parties and dinners and seeing everyone paired up together but I have to remind myself that I could have that if I really wanted it. I'm very okay with not being in a relationship right now though. I mean of course, there are the periods where I completely hate being by myself but this is my choice too. If I wanted it bad enough I'd do something about it.