do you think sex will cure your social phobia

Eam

Eam

Well-known member
persona said:
Yeah, but who wants to be that person? People usually don't want to get into relationships with people who want someone to "safe" them, it seems (and probably is) so needy.

Personally I could never get into that kind of a relationship. Not as the person helping or the one being helped. It just seems so ... unhealthy? Like your girl/boyfriend shouldn't be your therapist.
That's why most people want confidence from their partner - so they don't need to end up constantly supporting them.
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A lot of men would actually, whether that's right or wrong.

I see your point and I feel the same about not wanting to be the needy person. But I think we can all be needy in our own ways, I just couldn't handle it being a one way therapist situation like you mentioned.

Urgh, I always feel bad talking about relationships - I don't have the experience to back my point of view!
 
Remus

Remus

Moderator
Staff member
It does not cure it....no

Infact for me it opens up a whole new can of worms, spent most of my life avoiding sex because it triggers bad traumatic memories. I guess that's another issue rather than SA though.
 
Sinopia

Sinopia

1
It won't be a cure for me. Well, it can be a temporary cure, cuz I will feel better after it, but it won't heal our social phobia for the rest of our life.
 
DeathMetal

DeathMetal

Well-known member
Well, seeing that I am a 31 year old virgin that has never had a girlfriend, I think sex would be a big boost of confidence for me. It would definitely help with my SA. The fact that I have never had a girlfriend is a big source of my feelings of worthlessness.

To be honest though, actually having a girlfriend is more important to me right now than sex.
 
iamthenra

iamthenra

Well-known member
DeathMetal said:
Well, seeing that I am a 31 year old virgin that has never had a girlfriend, I think sex would be a big boost of confidence for me. It would definitely help with my SA. The fact that I have never had a girlfriend is a big source of my feelings of worthlessness.

To be honest though, actually having a girlfriend is more important to me right now than sex.
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I could have wrote the same thing... the only difference is I am 41 instead of 31.... Uhhhg.... What's wrong with wanting to experience this at least once before I die... with my track record, it's looking like it will never happen...
 
Danfalc

Danfalc

Banned
lol the only thing sex will cure is your sexual appetite for a little while.Though I can understand for a virgin it will maybe help them feel more confident having experience,but I don't think its that big of a deal.
 
lunarla

lunarla

Well-known member
Having sex wouldn't cure the mild SA that I do have or any other of my problems. Though relatively speaking, I'm sure it would help with feeling worthy and accordingly boost my level of self worth a bit. I'm, of course, speaking of this kind of experience with someone I care about and would already feel comfortable with to that level though. I'm absolutely positive that having meaningless sex would have the exact opposite affect on me.

Having said that, it shouldn't be the sole thing to make me feel worthy, etc. etc. etcccc.
 
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Falkor

Falkor

1
No, sex won't cure my social phobia.
Something really should happen to our mind-behaviour to cure our social anxiety
But when it would comes to a real soulmate , who would help in every little thing we worry about.. then I could say. Maybe that will help
But I'm not 100 % sure of course.. I don't know the key of getting a better life
 
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O

overcome.

Well-known member
I think sex will give you confidence and perhaps comfort, just knowing that you're doing 'regular' things and you're not getting completely beat by anxiety disorders. I know this is about SA, which isn't the problem I have (or have had in the past), but I didn't notice much of a difference at all regarding to anxiety before/after sex. That goes for the other anxiety problems I have, no difference. I understand though that the concept of a relationship, that could end up resulting in sexual activity could perhaps give a SA sufferer some much needed confidence.
 
LadyWench

LadyWench

Well-known member
Quite the opposite for me, actually. I've been in a relationship for nearly two years now, and I'm still a virgin. Even though I love my partner very much, I'm just too scared to have sex. The main reason is I fear pregnancy. I know I could get on birth control or use some other method of protection, but I know that no matter what, I'll still worry. I could use all the contraceptives in the world, and still freak out. I don't know what I can do to fix this. I know it's from my panic disorder and OCD, but still. I believe there's something else causing all of this...I just don't know what.

So, no. Sex won't cure my anxiety or any other problem I have. Well, I guess I don't KNOW since I've never had sex, but just the thought of actually going through with it freaks me out. I wish it didn't, though, because I have desires just like every other human being. My fears just overpower them.

Hi.
 
Moonie

Moonie

Well-known member
It certainly hasn't cured my SA, but it does allow me to open up more to the one I sexed. That is the reason why I think it's hard for me to make girl friends. As weird as this sounds, I can't flirt and touch and have sex with girls (I technically can, but have no desire to do so) so I cannot feel that closeness and flirtiness and touch. With guys, there is the potential for that. So, I think guys are more willing to get to 'know' me, even if it's for the wrong reasons.

Again, it hasn't cured my SA. It just allows me to become a little more comfortable with who I am with.
 
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