Do you like people?
- Thread starter InDeepshit
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Anonymous-User
Member
I like people...kind of when I first meet them. Unless they're men with obnoxious behaviors / mannerisms. But usually when I get to know other people better, I like them considerably less.
As a large group, in a very general sense... I hate people. Not because of any specific fears. I just find a lot about humanity itself dispicable.
As a large group, in a very general sense... I hate people. Not because of any specific fears. I just find a lot about humanity itself dispicable.
Anonymous-User
Member
Really?
What kind(s)?
What kind(s)?
NormanBates
Well-known member
I enjoy other people, but usually from afar. I enjoy my family and the way we take care of each other, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I like to interact with them a lot. I also like listening to people's funny interactions and just being around people in general, but I mostly do not like to be in the interactions myself.
dpr
Well-known member
This quote from one of my favorite TV shows kind of sums things up...
Elaine Benez: I hate people.
Jerry Seinfeld: They're the worst!
Seriously, the more people I meet, the more I like animals. Animals are so much cooler than people in every possible way.
I guess I can't say I hate all people, but I like very few people. My main thing is that most people are judgmental. They talk about each other behind each other's backs and they just judge, judge, judge! I can't stand it! I think the reason I still like the few people I like is because they are not judgmental and I respect that of them.
Ya know, I do this too, and I didn't even realize I did until I read this.
Elaine Benez: I hate people.
Jerry Seinfeld: They're the worst!
Seriously, the more people I meet, the more I like animals. Animals are so much cooler than people in every possible way.
I guess I can't say I hate all people, but I like very few people. My main thing is that most people are judgmental. They talk about each other behind each other's backs and they just judge, judge, judge! I can't stand it! I think the reason I still like the few people I like is because they are not judgmental and I respect that of them.
coriander1992 said:
Ya know, I do this too, and I didn't even realize I did until I read this.
lyricalliaisons
Well-known member
I love people. I'm actually fascinated by them. I love how different we all are, yet how the same. But.... I just can't be around them, can't socialize, can't make friends, though I would love more than anything to. I just wish I were able to, but I've never been able. I'm 26 & it's been this way my whole life. I'm hoping it'll get better & I'm sure it will, to a certain extent; it's gotten a lot better over the last five years. Hopefully, someday, I'll be able to be more than an observer & actually be able to participate in life.
Marie1988
Well-known member
Anonymous-User said:
people who miss the little things that matter, like manners.
people who are so eager to be accepted that they will be horriable to others in order to get recognition from the group their dying to be apart off.
people who complain about things which they dont try to make any better, instead just complain.
bitchy girls
men who control women
people who have no loyalty or morals
people who dont try.
bleach
Banned
dpr said:
Judgmental attitudes tend to be a sign of insecurity. Making negative judgments about other people gives us a feeling of superiority and assuages some of our fears and anxieties. I think on some level you understand this already, because you are indulging in the same behavior you criticize right here in this post, saying that you can't stand most people.
If most people are negative, perhaps it is because most people are insecure about themselves also. They don't judge because they want to be jerks, but because the only alternative they know is to judge themselves, which leads to rejecting themselves. And that is a painful way to go through life. I certainly know that SA leads to this mindset because I have lived in it for years.
There is a third alternative which is probably harder than the other two, but much better for you in the long run. That is to accept everyone without judgments, including yourself, and the people you dislike.
Why is that better? Well for one, anything that improves your attitude towards yourself (I'm speaking for everyone, here) can't be bad. Also, bear in mind that you are not the only one drawn to non-judgmental people. Everyone is drawn to them. Security and acceptance are attractive traits. And constant negativism is unattractive. To that you might think "So what, I am only negative towards other people who are negative, and I don't want them as friends anyway." But even the most accepting people do not want negativity in their lives. They will be drawn away from you, because they don't like to hear people judge, judge, judge any more than you do.
Azahara
Well-known member
Replay
I like people in general, but then I begun to discover their faults and I usually reject them. It´s ´cos of my perfectionism. Perhaps if I look at myself faults and accept them I´ll begin to discover that people are the same as me and I won´t build so much walls around me.
I usually think than people have to be like me, the same feeling, the same thoughts and so on...That´s impossible. 8O
I will change me, There is not need to change other people. I think most of them are imperfect but really nice.
Strenght and honnor!
I like people in general, but then I begun to discover their faults and I usually reject them. It´s ´cos of my perfectionism. Perhaps if I look at myself faults and accept them I´ll begin to discover that people are the same as me and I won´t build so much walls around me.
I usually think than people have to be like me, the same feeling, the same thoughts and so on...That´s impossible. 8O
I will change me, There is not need to change other people. I think most of them are imperfect but really nice.
Strenght and honnor!
dottie
Well-known member
a certain poster above brought this to mind:
Eighty percent of Americans think rudeness is a serious national problem
Ninety-nine percent of same people say that they themselves are not rude
http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/11/11/o.are.you.rude.test/index.html
Eighty percent of Americans think rudeness is a serious national problem
Ninety-nine percent of same people say that they themselves are not rude
http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/11/11/o.are.you.rude.test/index.html
Argamemnon
Well-known member
I don't like most people. Most people are far too arrogant and proud. I only like humble people.
dpr
Well-known member
bleach said:
Very insightful post. I'm of course aware of the irony of saying "I think judgmental people suck," and you are right that we are all hypocrites in that respect. Hell, just looking at someone forces your brain to automatically judge them to some degree so yeah, we are all judgmental. But some people seem to relish it. Or at least they seem like they do. It's like they wait all day for a chance to tell someone how to live their life and when that chance comes they just jump all over it! It probably does stem from insecurity though, be it myself or someone else. You're right.
Your last paragraph describes something I've been trying to wrap my head around for some time now. By talking with my therapist, I have concluded (with his help) that a lot of my problems stem from a belief that I am weak. I hate people messing with me or my friends in any way, and I have a bit of a problem with authority figures, but much more than would be considered normal I think. This is because I have a core belief in myself that I am weak, a pushover, a doormat. And when others mess with me, it triggers this belief, which triggers retaliation or I don't retaliate and feel ashamed, depressed, etc.
I'm still trying to work out how I can accept others' negativity (rudeness, judgmental attitudes, sarcastic remarks and all) while not feeling like a weak doormat.
bleach
Banned
light said:
Yes! This is a brilliant outlook that I think a lot of SADers don't consider. We think we must get everything "right" every time, and any failure encourages our pre-conceptions that we are bad socially. But one must consider that in every life, unless you are stranded alone on an island, every person has THOUSANDS of chances to meet new people, make an impression, and attract other people. There is nothing wrong with wasting a few dozen opportunities, or even a few hundred, for the benefit of polishing your social skills. And when you think about it, are even those lost opportunities really wasted? Surely they are wasted if you use them to beat yourself up, but if you learn from each meeting, then they can only help you in the future.
Trial and error may be the slowest way to learn new skills(or attitudes, or whatever it is that is holding you back socially) but it is also one of the most profound teachers IF you approach these situations with the right mentality.
nephatitus
Well-known member
depends which personality comes forward, usually when i do talk to some one a voice in my head it telling mw horrible things about them especially when they start talking as well. I dont mean to but some part of me really does