do compliments set off your S/A

[Section_31]

Hey everyone,

So we have a bunch of auditors in my office from the US, and they were having network issues. So i go into the office theyre in, to get them all set up. Of course, they all have to be georgous girls, not one older than me. So right away im feeling intimidated, but im ignoring it, just doing my thing and trying to get out of there as soon as possible.

Im almost finished, when one of them randomly says my accent is pretty cute....and wow, i must have blushed as red as an apple.

So now im nervous and on edge and have barricaded myself in my office (not literally).

I jump every time i hear footsteps.

Anyone else have this problem?

 

[MollyBeGood]

Yeah, compliments do make me even more self aware than I already am and if it's from someone I admire or like an it is unexpected I will definitely blush which gets further attention, so it's a vicious cycle and all the while I am pretty miserable when that person was just trying to be nice. LOL

 

[MrJones]

It doesn't happen often, but when someone does it, yes, I blush a lot and I get very very nervous (very).

So now im nervous and on edge and have barricaded myself in my office (not literally).

It sounds fun, you could try it one day.... probably you'll end up jobless, but you'll have tried it ::

 

[*Amy*]

Well, yes... but on the other hand, a compliment raises my self-esteem, so it is always welcome

 

[elek2ronik]

Yeah compliments set off my SA. I don't really deal with compliments too well. I all of a sudden I feel pressured and feel like everyone is watching me, or expects me to be exceptional. I guess it depends on who it is, but in general my SA kicks in.

 

[Apersonalan]

I think it just plays on you, you always think you have to raise people's expectations. I get anxious because I feel I don't deserve it and get more nervous with compliments just as I'm at my most confident self when I'm liked less.

 

[vexatiousmind]

I get embarrassed, but not nervous.

Insults on the other had, do make me way anxious

 

[elek2ronik]

I think it just plays on you, you always think you have to raise people's expectations. I get anxious because I feel I don't deserve it and get more nervous with compliments just as I'm at my most confident self when I'm liked less.

I agree with this post

 

[da_illest101]

I love compliments, can't get enough of them

 

[silverblue]

I always worry compliments are untrue, people are just trying to be nice and lying. Kinda like your mom would tell you your drawing was great as a kid, even if it sucked.

People at work know I'm really sensitive. If they criticize me, I'll cry. So they're nice, because they're nice people, but I don't really believe a word they say.

 

[Cecilia219]

Yeah, compliments do make me even more self aware than I already am and if it's from someone I admire or like an it is unexpected I will definitely blush which gets further attention, so it's a vicious cycle and all the while I am pretty miserable when that person was just trying to be nice. LOL

YESS!! This is so true. One time one of my teachers complimented a project of mine in front of the class and I blushed so much that other students were making fun of it, and she actually APOLOGIZED to me later. Then I felt bad. How awful ::

 

[Acegame]

Ohh yes, the "compliment-return" (i think you could base a Seinfeld episode on this one). If i get a compliment this is my instant reply to shift the attention from myself to the other person, but more often than not this converts into huge akwardness...

 

[simpsons2007]

I wouldn't know how I would react as I don't get any compliments.

But I guess I would react the same way I react when someone is talking directly to me. Embarrassed, intimidated, worried, anxious, there only doing it because they feel sorry for me.

 

[Mokkat]

yes, I seem to think that people have hidden motives, 99% of the time I receive a compliment.

Question: does any else have problems give compliments too? I can rarely give anyone a genuine honest compliment - it always feels like Im doing it to appear polite, and I feel guilty after.

 

[IGotSeoul]

Though it rarely happens, I get startled when someone compliments me out of the blue because I'm generally used to people ignoring my existence. If I'm complimented during a conversation with anyone, I get suspicious if the person is just being a sycophant or is fishing for compliments; I may think he or she wants me to compliment them back and that makes me feel more uncomfortable.

That pretty much sums it up.

 

[IGotSeoul]

Question: does any else have problems give compliments too? I can rarely give anyone a genuine honest compliment - it always feels like Im doing it to appear polite, and I feel guilty after.

I generally try to be as polite as possible, so the genuinity matters little. Of course I won't outright flatter people, I'll approach most things with a polite attitude.

Sometimes when I'm speaking to people, I don't feel genuine at all though. Superfluous social gestures and excessive formality, I annoy myself.