Bitter about being unattractive

[stevelee24]

i have had this same problem since being about 12 years old nothing changes it nothing makes it better i have had gfs that where models and most guys would only dream about but still it never made me feel attractive.
its a mental illness and i dont think there is a cure or solution you just have to learn to live with it

 

[Barry1979]

Has anyone ever heard the whole "the women/men who were not hot in high school are the ones who always end up being hot when they are older"? I used to hear this all the time and did not bleieve it......but I can say without a doubt in my experience it is the truth.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

Has anyone ever heard the whole "the women/men who were not hot in high school are the ones who always end up being hot when they are older"? I used to hear this all the time and did not bleieve it......but I can say without a doubt in my experience it is the truth.

What if you were in between hot and not?

 

[Shyangel]

I'm goofy and dorky looking, but I don't care. ^.^ I'm comfortable in my appearance. I don't think I'm attractive and for some reason it doesn't bother me. I accept I am ugly to 90% of people. What I don't accept is them treating me badly because of it. I rock my ugliness, thank you very much, I'm sorry you don't see it. * Snaps fingers*

 

[bardock]

I'm goofy and dorky looking, but I don't care. ^.^ I'm comfortable in my appearance. I don't think I'm attractive and for some reason it doesn't bother me. I accept I am ugly to 90% of people. What I don't accept is them treating me badly because of it. I rock my ugliness, thank you very much, I'm sorry you don't see it. * Snaps fingers*

i like your attitude lol

 

[Faradesti]

You know there is a lot I could say here, but all I am going to say is - attitude and personality count for a lot. I dont feel I am particularly good looking either but even I can pull a girl once in a whille.... I can sympathize with how you feel though - but I am gonna keep this short.

In respect to women - its about how you make them feel that counts more than anything else.... I cant imagine too many females staying for very long with a really hot guy that makes them feel bored or bad about themselves.

Stimulate their brain - it works everytime.

As a girl, I have to agree with ShyKiwi. And in all honesty, there have been people that I didn't find attractive in the slightest bit, but once I spent some time with them... Well, I guess it was like magic I guess? I don't know how to explain it, I'm not so good with words. It was like I just saw them in a new light.

 

[KiaKaha]

I'm goofy and dorky looking, but I don't care. ^.^ I'm comfortable in my appearance. I don't think I'm attractive and for some reason it doesn't bother me. I accept I am ugly to 90% of people. What I don't accept is them treating me badly because of it. I rock my ugliness, thank you very much, I'm sorry you don't see it. * Snaps fingers*

People shouldnt treat other people badly regardless - but yes especially if someone is judging them on appearance - I think twiggle mentioned somewhere that you have to work with what you have - you may not look like Brad Pitt or whatever but someone somewhere will find you attractive in someway - especially if you make them feel good.

Now if I could only listen to my own advice it would make this post completely credible.

btw Shyangel you are not ugly at all - by right of being female that automatically makes you a hottie (from a male perspective that is) - but even without that right... you are still pretty easy on the eye IMO.

 

[Shyangel]

People shouldnt treat other people badly regardless - but yes especially if someone is judging them on appearance - I think twiggle mentioned somewhere that you have to work with what you have - you may not look like Brad Pitt or whatever but someone somewhere will find you attractive in someway - especially if you make them feel good.

Now if I could only listen to my own advice it would make this post completely credible.

btw Shyangel you are not ugly at all - by right of being female that automatically makes you a hottie (from a male perspective that is) - but even without that right... you are still pretty easy on the eye IMO.

Your exactly right, Kiwi. I think that fact is the only reason I have positive experience with guys. I'm very nice and complimenting to people and most seem to appreciate that. So, that supports that theory.

I've not been called ugly really, but I know what is typically considered beautiful, and I'm not it. Very Skinny, buck teeth, mono brow, and frizzy hair... I don't see anyone on magazines sporting those.:: The point I'm making is, I know I'm very different from the ideal beauty. I'm cool with it, though.

Thanks, Kiwi, for the compliment.

 

[MikeyC]

I'm goofy and dorky looking, but I don't care. ^.^ I'm comfortable in my appearance. I don't think I'm attractive and for some reason it doesn't bother me. I accept I am ugly to 90% of people. What I don't accept is them treating me badly because of it. I rock my ugliness, thank you very much, I'm sorry you don't see it. * Snaps fingers*

I think you're beautiful, Angel.

People shouldnt treat other people badly regardless - but yes especially if someone is judging them on appearance - I think twiggle mentioned somewhere that you have to work with what you have - you may not look like Brad Pitt or whatever but someone somewhere will find you attractive in someway - especially if you make them feel good.

Now if I could only listen to my own advice it would make this post completely credible.

btw Shyangel you are not ugly at all - by right of being female that automatically makes you a hottie (from a male perspective that is) - but even without that right... you are still pretty easy on the eye IMO.

Agreed with all of what you said, mate. How many people look like Brad Pitt, anyway?

 

[Shyangel]

I think you're beautiful, Angel.

Thanks, Mikey.:: Your such a sweet heart.

 

[KiaKaha]

Your exactly right, Kiwi. I think that fact is the only reason I have positive experience with guys. I'm very nice and complimenting to people and most seem to appreciate that. So, that supports that theory.

I've not been called ugly really, but I know what is typically considered beautiful, and I'm not it. Very Skinny, buck teeth, mono brow, and frizzy hair... I don't see anyone on magazines sporting those.:: The point I'm making is, I know I'm very different from the ideal beauty. I'm cool with it, though.

Thanks, Kiwi, for the compliment.

Well yeah, I mean thats what I am sorta getting at. I am not typically attractive either... I am skinny, balding... etc etc.. and I know what a hot guy looks like..its definitely not me...(and yes it does bother me a bit) but I think most of the weight in attractiveness comes from other factors. I still do think that looks matter to a certain degree though - paricularly in how other people percieve what kind of person they think you might be - but its not the be all and end all when it comes to attraction.

I have always thought the actress Tilda Swinton was extremely sexy but a lot of people think that she is ugly - and I once dated a girl who had extremely frizzy hair but I found her so passionate and sexy it drove me crazy.

There arent any rules... I guess is what I am trying to say.

 

[MikeyC]

Well yeah, I mean thats what I am sorta getting at. I am not typically attractive either... I am skinny, balding... etc etc.. and I know what a hot guy looks like..its definitely not me...(and yes it does bother me a bit)

There arent any rules... I guess is what I am trying to say.

You're right, there's no rules. I've seen your photos and you look good, mate. Any woman would be lucky to have you. Personality counts for a lot, too. My ex said that's something she liked in me. So there you go!

 

[Kiwong]

Worrying about how I looked was probably a big deal for me throughout my teens, twenties and early thirties. Now that I am 49 my concerns about life are very different.

 

[Shyangel]

Well yeah, I mean thats what I am sorta getting at. I am not typically attractive either... I am skinny, balding... etc etc.. and I know what a hot guy looks like..its definitely not me...(and yes it does bother me a bit) but I think most of the weight in attractiveness comes from other factors. I still do think that looks matter to a certain degree though - paricularly in how other people percieve what kind of person they think you might be - but its not the be all and end all when it comes to attraction.

I have always thought the actress Tilda Swinton was extremely sexy but a lot of people think that she is ugly - and I once dated a girl who had extremely frizzy hair but I found her so passionate and sexy it drove me crazy.

There arent any rules... I guess is what I am trying to say.

I think your a good looking guy, just to let you know, Kiwi. I'm surprised anyone would say other wise. Your right, Kiwi. My X was by all means not deemed attractive but he was an insanely sweet guy, and that's what attracted me to him. Good qualities are much more attractive then appearance can ever be.

 

[MikeyC]

I think your a good looking guy, just to let you know, Kiwi. I'm surprised anyone would say other wise.

Pretty much. You're a handsome man, mate.

 

[MsBuzzkillington]

I am pretty bitter about being unattractive. Mostly because I seem to be stuck on the idea that it isn't fair how some people can be so painstakingly beautiful and then there's mean who is just out right disgustingly ugly. I wonder why did I have turn out so ugly. I would have been fine with looking average, I would have been fine with just kind of cute. I don't need to be a super model, but why so drastically unattractive?

I know that people who are attractive don't always see themselves that way and we all suffer from self esteem and body image issues, but it's still extremely frustrating to see pretty girls and guys complain that they are ugly- even after repeated attempts of people telling them they are beautiful/handsome. It makes me bitter, I can't help it.

I try and get passed it, because this is who I am and there's no way I can change it. I know that having a positive attitude and being friendly will make this life more bearable to get through alone, but it's extremely difficult.

 

[Rembrandt Broam]

I am pretty bitter about being unattractive. Mostly because I seem to be stuck on the idea that it isn't fair how some people can be so painstakingly beautiful and then there's mean who is just out right disgustingly ugly.

Well you're right. It isn't fair that some people just happen to have been born with a certain configuration of features that is considered by a lot of people to be attractive. But the majority of people don't fall into that category anyway. The majority of people are about average looking - some a little better than average, some a little worse. Not looking like <insert actor/actress you consider attractive> doesn't make you ugly.

I wonder why did I have turn out so ugly. I would have been fine with looking average, I would have been fine with just kind of cute. I don't need to be a super model, but why so drastically unattractive?

You're probably a lot more attractive than you realise.

 

[Kinetik]

You're probably a lot more attractive than you realise.

She is - smart as hell, with a ton of great qualities and a heart of gold to match. All things that make a person attractive regardless of their outward appearance. That's the point I was trying to make to recluse.

 

[Azael]

You know there is a lot I could say here, but all I am going to say is - attitude and personality count for a lot. I dont feel I am particularly good looking either but even I can pull a girl once in a whille.... I can sympathize with how you feel though - but I am gonna keep this short.

In respect to women - its about how you make them feel that counts more than anything else.... I cant imagine too many females staying for very long with a really hot guy that makes them feel bored or bad about themselves.

Stimulate their brain - it works everytime.

Attitude and personality? Men who are attractive are lucky enough to have women imagine all of these traits for them. They can quite often go as far as abusing these women and will still be seen as having these wonderful redeeming traits. I'm sorry but none of that is truly observable in real life. Perhaps were you in my shoes you would feel very differently.

 

[AsTimeBurns]

This isn't some fairy tale world where the nerd/loser/whatever gets the girl just because they are nice and kind. That kind of thing rarely happens in real life.