How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Miserable. Like this is how my life's meant to be. Ah just want to crawl into a deep dark cave and f*ckin' die. :crying:
My mother's stooped so low as to threaten suicide if I make another attempt to fill out the online application on my local housing department's website. :sad: And she says she's not trying to emotionally blackmail me. :thumbdown:
My mother's stooped so low as to threaten suicide if I make another attempt to fill out the online application on my local housing department's website. :sad: And she says she's not trying to emotionally blackmail me. :thumbdown:
Hot_Tamale
Well-known member
Sometimes I want to walk outside at night or go home after a hard day at work and go see my dog, but I stop myself and remember there is no dog anymore. There has always been a dog I could visit at home ever since I was a little child in elementary school. It feels like reaching to scratch an itch and remembering I don't own a hand anymore. On the bright side...her death will not be on my conscience.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Stuck in a rut. :sad: I'd much rather be living on my own, and be outta the way of my family. Who have shown they don't really care about my well-being, but that ain't gonnae happen. :kickingmyself:
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Must the thought: "Aw, f*ck! Whit'll ma mother think o' me?!" always cross my mind every time ah do something for myself? F*ck sake! :kickingmyself:
Ah hate how my older sister will praise me for being able to cope on my own, despite my disability. Then make me feel bad for wanting to move outta the family home, and not wanting to be my mother carer for the rest of my life. :sad:
Ah hate how my older sister will praise me for being able to cope on my own, despite my disability. Then make me feel bad for wanting to move outta the family home, and not wanting to be my mother carer for the rest of my life. :sad:
theslowesthand
Banned
Probably the dullest xmas to date for me. The xmas season just reminds me of how empty my life is. And i don't think i can do anything about it. My boring lifestyle has become a habit. I might as well have schizophrenia (grapevine's rugs) for all it's worth. :sad:
It's hard to be grateful for the gift/s of life, when your life's continuously emotionally decrepit.
Sorry for being such a downer at xmas.
It's hard to be grateful for the gift/s of life, when your life's continuously emotionally decrepit.
Sorry for being such a downer at xmas.
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Why me? Why did I have to be raised by a bunch of wimmin who make the f*ckin' Kardashian sisters look intelligent by comparison? Why?! :kickingmyself: :crying: Ah feel like I've lost IQ point today, just from trying to explain the inner workings of a laptop alone. And how lost files can be recovered. F*ck sake! And my older sister brags about how she's not stupid. Well, today proved otherwise. 
mg:
To say I hate my family at this point is an understatement. :thumbdown:
mg:To say I hate my family at this point is an understatement. :thumbdown:
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
I'm with ye on that, slowhand. :thumbup:
Don't feel sorry for being a downer, though. Christmas is going to dull for me as well. Utter crap in fact. I'm actually wondering if the dinner is going to be worth sitting through this year. Or whether I'd be better off eating alone again this year? :idontknow: Cuz knowing my luck I'll make some snide remark at my older sister's expense when she asks me why I'm not talking. And, after today, I know I'd humiliate her if I did that.
PugofCrydee
You want to know how I got these scars?
I wonder what a Xmas 'get together' would turn out like if we all got together for it ?
Lol!.. can you imagine?
Scenario one, - no one would turn up.
Scenario 2 - we'd turn up, but no one would talk..
Scenario 3 - We'd turn up, talk to each other and actually enjoy ourselves.
I'm betting on 3. Why? Because I've come to understand that we here on SPW actually have a lot in common. People with a lot in common will more often than not bond.
I know it's not ever going to happen, but I'd love to take a day.. just one freaking day to reach out and get to know some of you.
Merry Xmas guys
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Whatever ya do... Don't invite me tae that! Seriously! It'd get oot o' hand quickly, especially if booze is involved. :bigsmile:
And know my luck, I'd put my foot in the moment ah arrived...
"Way-hay! Ye showed up! Mind you, it'd be awkward if ye didnae, and ah just showed up masel... Anyway, guess ah better introduce myself, eh? Hiya, am Graeme ! Nice tae meet yous. Well, no individually, but by the end o' the night... Ah should remember yer names. Christ! Ah didnae half go on, eh? It's the curse o' this accent. Right, am away fur a pint..."
And from there onward, the get together would become a bit of a blurry for me...
Merry Xmas to you as well. :thumbup:
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Really tired. And ultimately pissed off that my family seem to think I, both, know a lot about computers and yet know nothing about 'em. :idontknow: Thus meaning any computer issues with laptops, other than my own, are apparently my job to fix. :kickingmyself: Christ! I even had to move family photos from my sister phone the other day.
Then, she throw a tantrum when said photos wouldn't open for her to view. Which led me getting accused of having done something to her laptop, when I just moved the photos as she'd asked. And she very nearly hit me when I calmly pointed out that if the photos were truly lost, as she claimed. How does that explain the reason for the thumbnail preview of the photos still showed the photos in her Pictures folder?
Then, she throw a tantrum when said photos wouldn't open for her to view. Which led me getting accused of having done something to her laptop, when I just moved the photos as she'd asked. And she very nearly hit me when I calmly pointed out that if the photos were truly lost, as she claimed. How does that explain the reason for the thumbnail preview of the photos still showed the photos in her Pictures folder?
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theslowesthand
Banned
I haven't got any patience with computers these days, really, yet i'm a know-it-all concerning them. I think it's due to my declined mental/emotional health. Also that i'm just sick & tired of the never-ending & constantly-renewing complexities & "dumbness" of them. They break things that aren't broken (eg the search in Windows 7). They ask you to search online for answers, when all the answers SHOULD be available without having to hunt through forums. And other dumb stuff. You'd thing the computer geeks would have mastered such things after all these years, but no.
theslowesthand
Banned
Off to beach now. Had some pills & had a beer.
Probably my only outing for xmas & new year.
Enjoyed it!
Probably my only outing for xmas & new year.
Enjoyed it!
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Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Oh no! Why did ye bring that up? Nut, can't help I'm going to rant... :veryangry:
Technical support are a bunch o' lazy b@$%@rds! :thumbdown: At least in my experience. And they only reason they ask you to try and resolve any issues yerself is cuz they can be arsed having you take it to them to fix. Trust me, ah know... I used to get my cousin or my oldest sister's step brother to fix my laptop whenever I had an issue. And I'd get it back n' notice some programs that weren't there when I gave the laptop to them to fix. But, more recently, I had the email of a someone my oldest sister is friends with, who own and run a computer repair business. And do a good job when it comes to properly fixing them.
Anyway, as of 2 months ago, I emailed him asking about partition recovery. Never heard back from them. So after a 2nd e-mail never got a response, I had to resolve the issue myself. So, eh, take it from me... You're better off learning how to fix computer issues yourself if you don't want any issues to come about by giving somebuddy else the task of doing it for you.
Lionhearted
Well-known member
I remember being depressed, after I had to help my brother take his PC to a technical workshop, where we had to keep on going.... on, and on, and on. Not to mention the depression he himself felt. Oh, and try not to repair printers - I've had a history of many printers, mostly that of HP, which just kept on messing up after a few months of purchase. Repairs are done in such a manner, that they'll start to malfunction after a few months - and thus, you're forced to buy a new one.
Ok, I feel slightly better now.
vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
I wonder what a Xmas 'get together' would turn out like if we all got together for it ?
Lol!.. can you imagine?
Scenario one, - no one would turn up.
Scenario 2 - we'd turn up, but no one would talk..
Scenario 3 - We'd turn up, talk to each other and actually enjoy ourselves.
I'm betting on 3. Why? Because I've come to understand that we here on SPW actually have a lot in common. People with a lot in common will more often than not bond.
I know it's not ever going to happen, but I'd love to take a day.. just one freaking day to reach out and get to know some of you.
Merry Xmas guys
I remember years ago people would talk about stuff like that on the forum all the time, I found one old thread here and I remember there being like a dozen, but I'm getting old maybe my memory is starting to go now :
:
FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
I feel pretty anxious, there's going to be lots of people at my family's Christmas party tonight and some of them I don't know.
I've already told my mother I may be ducking out early, but she just tuned me out. I suppose I'll just suck it up for three hours like I always do, what the heck, it's only once a year.
Dreadful.
I've already told my mother I may be ducking out early, but she just tuned me out. I suppose I'll just suck it up for three hours like I always do, what the heck, it's only once a year.
Dreadful.
FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
I bailed. I couldn't handle it.
My step-brother's new fiance, who I haven't met yet, being at the party, combined with the recent tension between me and my uncle just made it too damn much.
I stood in the upstairs bathroom trying to pull it together for fifteen minutes but the anxiety just kept building and building. I was on the verge of tears. I sneaked out during a sliver of opportunity, though my cousin passed me in the front yard on her way in. She asked me where I was going and I told her I was on the brink of a full-blown panic attack, she said that she'd tell my mother the deal (she's had her own issues, so it was actually a blessing that she caught my Batman act).
After that, I drove around for ten minutes trying to negotiate a deal with myself, something that would convince me to go back in, but there was no way.
I'm back at my apartment now, expecting a phone-call any second from my mother. She's going to be very upset that I'm not there, meanwhile my douche-bag step-father will relish my "2017 Christmas no-show", while the rest of my family rolls their eyes at my perceived melodrama.
This is the worst.
My step-brother's new fiance, who I haven't met yet, being at the party, combined with the recent tension between me and my uncle just made it too damn much.
I stood in the upstairs bathroom trying to pull it together for fifteen minutes but the anxiety just kept building and building. I was on the verge of tears. I sneaked out during a sliver of opportunity, though my cousin passed me in the front yard on her way in. She asked me where I was going and I told her I was on the brink of a full-blown panic attack, she said that she'd tell my mother the deal (she's had her own issues, so it was actually a blessing that she caught my Batman act).
After that, I drove around for ten minutes trying to negotiate a deal with myself, something that would convince me to go back in, but there was no way.
I'm back at my apartment now, expecting a phone-call any second from my mother. She's going to be very upset that I'm not there, meanwhile my douche-bag step-father will relish my "2017 Christmas no-show", while the rest of my family rolls their eyes at my perceived melodrama.
This is the worst.