Is life worth living?

TreeBones

Well-known member
I don't really know exactly what this post is going to be about but I guess I feel like venting and rambling on.

Today was not the best day, I was actually contemplating suicide, and all because a girl started talking to me (she's sort of new at school).

I didn't want to look her in the eye, I couldn't think of words to say that wouldn't make me look like I was literally mentally challenged, I kept trying to end the conversation and she would come up with something new to say. I just tried to end it ASAP and put my headphones in so it seemed like I couldn't hear her all day. We weren't even talking for 10 minutes and it ruined my day. :eek:mg:.. it was exhausting.

I don't blame her, I'm the one with the problem. I was thinking the rest of the day how can I live a life like this? I'm not so sure that it's all because of anxiety or if I'm just really really unsocial. I wonder if other people with social anxiety want friends or not?


I was also thinking that If I can barely hold a conversation with someone for no longer that a few minutes, how am I going to get through this big meet up thing coming up with an old best friend that I haven't seen in a few years. A lot has changed and I don't like falling below peoples expectations of who they're thinking I am. I use to be more fun and funny, and less socially challenged and serious.

if I believed that there wouldn't be any consequences to committing suicide I'm 99% sure I'd be dead. I read this thing once a while back about how you can't kill yourself because the cosmos have some super thought out "plan" for your life and that if you die other people who's life you were supposed to "touch" will be cosmically f***** or something like that but I can't possibly think of anyone in the future or even present for that matter for which that would apply. I don't see myself making any connections really. I don't even think I can "connect " with anyone anymore.

Right now I wish I could live in my own little bubble for a while with my favorite movies and lots of junk food.
 

Flanscho

Well-known member
Sure, life is worth living. As long as you're not having a body that infested with cancer that you die any day now, live can become better.

I don't like suicide. I mean, you're dead. You hurt your family and anyone else that somehow might like you. Why would you want to hurt them? And... well, you're dead. Gone. For good. No chance for improvement ever again. You cease to exist. You should avoid that.
 

Agent_Violet

Well-known member
well doll,suicide is out of the question bc you're not a selfish person and I know you wouldn't like hurting everyone around you. so that's first.

second,of COURSE life is worth living! Even those with the most torturous existence will tell you they just want to keep living and breathing even if things are utter crap.

third,I know it's easier said than done but you have got to find a way to stop putting so much stock into what people think of you. Who are they and why does their opinion of what you say matter so much? In reality,they're just as stuck in their own head as you are in yours so you're ALL in the same boat.Maybe try to remember that for all your nervousness and awkwardness and inability to carry on a conversation,there's about 90% of the crowd feeling the same exact way.
 

Capsaicin

Well-known member
It's easy to become disillusioned when you're given a blueprint for how life is "supposed" to be and plans don't turn out accordingly. Go to school, graduate, go into college immediately knowing what you want to do, graduate, get a job, get married, have kids. However, I know very few people who've done exactly that or who've done that without breaks, struggles, and unplanned additions.

I know happy, social 23-year-olds who are currently living at home, successful engineers who struggled with anxiety and failed a few courses, and people who went to college for a degree they later regretted but moved on to more fulfilling work. Lots more, too. It's perfectly okay to have periods where you have no idea what you're doing or why you're doing it.
 
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Odo

Banned
I don't think suicide is always a bad thing and fear of guilt over how your loved ones would react is not a good reason to live. You're not living your life for other people, you're living it for you... and if you let other people influence the way you feel or how you act, you're never going to be happy or feel free. I would say it's a lot more selfish to try to guilt someone into doing what you want by telling them they're selfish for wanting a degree of control over their lives.

On the other hand, it's probably better not to do something like this impulsively, and furthermore I don't think you want to die so much as you want to improve your situation and you don't know how to do it.

If you seriously want to kill yourself because you couldn't talk to some girl, then I would say you need to find better way of dealing with failures and disappointments. They are always going to happen and it will be a lot easier if you know how to handle them when they do.

I'm really not sure how you would go about doing this, and it's probably not going to be an easy lesson to learn, but it's something you should definitely look into.
 

TreeBones

Well-known member
The extreme of suicide didn't just come up out of the blue, it's on my mind quite a lot although I'm not depressed, maybe a little gloomy, but now depressed. I know it seems ridiculous and irrational like most of my thoughts but that's how I felt, Looking back on earlier today I'm wondering why I got so down about this particular event.I have awkward conversations with people all the time. I think it was because it seemed like she wanted to be friends with me instead of just the usual small talk and that for whatever reason scares me, also she goes to my school and I'd have to see her everyday. But then again it might just be because I haven't eaten in 10 days and I'm very tired ( and before I hear comments like you're anorexic or starving, I'm not, I'm fasting, I do it every few months and I feel great afterwards)
 

hippiechild

Well-known member
In general I do not think that life is worth living. Some lives are worth living, but the majority are not. However, once started, a life in progress is worth seeing through to the end.

The worth of a life is a wonky sort of thing, because of our inside perspective. As a ratio of cost/benefit, the cost of a life is very small (time and calorie-wise) relative to the potential payoff (to the producer, as well as the product). However, life becomes a gift and a burden to the body that it inhabits. From this inside perspective, the cost of life is non-trivial compared to its benefits, and its worthwhileness can be disputed. This asymmetry of percieved worth on the two sides of the life cycle is, in a vague sense, what perpetuates Life (proper) outward through space and forward through time.
 

Kiwong

Well-known member
I guess it depends on what your goals are.
Still, I don't think that life is something you win.

It's mostly something you endure.

I've won on many occasions, those moments when I trick my negative and anxious mind into happiness. That is a win in my opinion. I've achieved a lot of that this last few years, despite adversity.
 

Silatuyok

Well-known member
In general I do not think that life is worth living. Some lives are worth living, but the majority are not. However, once started, a life in progress is worth seeing through to the end.

In this sense, I think it could be argued that all lives are worth living, because it takes many so-called worthless lives to bring forth the few great ones who make a difference. How do any of us know whether or not we will be the great-grandfather/mother of the man/woman/robot who discovers a cure for cancer? Or social anxiety? Just a thought.
 

SilentBird

Well-known member
TreeBones, you are so young. All sorts of good things can and probably will happen for you. I wanted to give up when I was younger, but if I did, I would have missed out on so much. I was proven wrong, there were things worth living for, things I didn’t expect.

The part where you mention you don’t feel connected struck a chord with me. It’s a risk to put yourself out there, to show who you are. There’s a chance you might get hurt but usually there is reward in getting to know someone and them getting to know you.

You are fine as you are, share that with people, when you feel the need. I am hoping you have another chance with the girl you mention.

There are people out there who would be glad to know you.
 
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Capsaicin

Well-known member
The extreme of suicide didn't just come up out of the blue, it's on my mind quite a lot although I'm not depressed, maybe a little gloomy, but now depressed. I know it seems ridiculous and irrational like most of my thoughts but that's how I felt, Looking back on earlier today I'm wondering why I got so down about this particular event.I have awkward conversations with people all the time. I think it was because it seemed like she wanted to be friends with me instead of just the usual small talk and that for whatever reason scares me, also she goes to my school and I'd have to see her everyday. But then again it might just be because I haven't eaten in 10 days and I'm very tired ( and before I hear comments like you're anorexic or starving, I'm not, I'm fasting, I do it every few months and I feel great afterwards)

Maybe it's more existential... ?
 

Marc7

Well-known member
I think life is worth living. But I understand being suicidal because I use to go through it but i think I am putting my life at risk indirectly when I don't go the doctor to see if I have high blood pressure and cholesterol. Also because of my none motivation I been swallowing gum so that another thing to worry about affecting my health. Also even if I find something negative I might not do anything about it :(.
 

coyote

Well-known member
living beings live - that's what makes us what we are

when your life ends, you end

you don't get to experience the joy of having your problems solved, you don't get to experience the relief from pain

because the moment you die, you cease to exist

so basically, you're frozen for eternity at your very worst

the nature of existence, however, is change - unrelenting change

nothing in EXISTENCE stays the same - ever - it constantly changes

the only way for your life to change is to stay alive

the only way for you to change is to continue to exist
 

Odo

Banned
In this sense, I think it could be argued that all lives are worth living, because it takes many so-called worthless lives to bring forth the few great ones who make a difference. How do any of us know whether or not we will be the great-grandfather/mother of the man/woman/robot who discovers a cure for cancer? Or social anxiety? Just a thought.

I'm sorry, but this is one of the most depressing things that I have ever heard.

I really don't think that someone's value is measured by their contributions to society, or their potential to make someone who will contribute to society. If anything, it's all this pressure to achieve things and make an impact that's unhealthy because it's making us focus on our things instead of each other.

Maybe this is against the rules here, but I don't think that all lives are worth living... especially if they're just trying to 'improve' the world. Because the world will never really know you.

Chances are, if you died tomorrow, you would be easily replaced within the following weeks. Even the so-called 'great men' of history weren't necessarily the only people who made the breakthroughs, they were most likely the ones who claimed the patent before the others, or who were in the right place at the right time. And the people who 'love' these great people don't actually love them, they just love what they did. That is the nature of our society... people are just as disposable as products, EXCEPT to the people who actually know them.

This is why I think that life is only worth living so long as you are serving an important function in a small community. if there were fewer people in the world or if we were in a situation where we were depending on each other instead of 'the system', then life would be more worthwhile, but as is I definitely don't feel like it is... it's more like they grab you, drain you of your vitality and spit you out.

I think this is why not being able to truly connect with people is probably one of the worst things in the world.
 
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coyote

Well-known member
every life contributes in some way to the fabric of the universe

everything is interconnected in ways that we can't imagine

it is not within our limited powers of observation to determine each life's "value" to the whole

we must treat each one as valuable as the next
 

Odo

Banned
every life contributes in some way to the fabric of the universe

everything is interconnected in ways that we can't imagine

it is not within our limited powers of observation to determine each life's "value" to the whole

we must treat each one as valuable as the next

I'm pretty sure that value is relative.

I don't think people are precious about a single strand of hair, or the tips of their fingernails.

Unless you have your own thing, it's all supply and demand.
 
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