I feel smart.
How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
DeadmanWalking
Well-known member
Invisibleman
Well-known member
I actually want to cry my eyes out right now. I feel awful.
Phoenixx
Well-known member
^ That's great to hear!I achieved my tiny goal for the day!
I feel a lot better. I had told my mom of my earlier incident, so she decided last minute to come see me so we could talk. A bit embarrassing, and unexpected, but I needed it. We went out for coffee (my soy chai latte was fantastic, btw) and just sat outside and talked. I've never told her of my social phobia/anxiety, but I think she's suspecting now about how I feel with communicating with other people. Even though I'm not open about it, I think she knows. She's never said anything directly either, but after the whole "I know it's hard" talk, it's kind of obvious she's starting to know how I'm feeling and what I'm going through. Anyway, after that she took me to a couple stores just to get out, plus I needed a few things.
Definitely didn't get hardly anything done today, but I really don't care. I needed to set aside my stuff for a while to focus on myself for a bit.
DeadmanWalking
Well-known member
I feel really awkward. I just went shopping and had the express honor of being witness to so much PDA that I just felt..... out of place. I know I complain about that a lot on here, but, this time, it was just ridiculous! Not only that, but I also keep having the pleasure of the company of females, knowing full well that absolutely nothing will come of it! I'm more of a literal chick magnet than a metaphorical chick magnet::! Is this some punishment for something that I committed in a past life or are the sins of the father being paid for by the body of the son? People just, for some magical reason, pop up in my area whenever I want to go somewhere. When I'm in, so is everyone else, but, when I go out, it seems like everyone else decides to leave as well. With all of these occurences and thoughts compounding themselves in my head, it's a wonder I haven't broken or killed myself yet!
:! Is this some punishment for something that I committed in a past life or are the sins of the father being paid for by the body of the son? People just, for some magical reason, pop up in my area whenever I want to go somewhere. When I'm in, so is everyone else, but, when I go out, it seems like everyone else decides to leave as well. With all of these occurences and thoughts compounding themselves in my head, it's a wonder I haven't broken or killed myself yet!
MrJones
Well-known member
If you feel like you want to cry, do it. Don't try to hold it, it can make you feel better.
I hope you feel better soon.
If you want to talk, I'll be glad to listen, you can send me a PM whenever you want.
vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
*While reading* Hmm, he seems to....
...yes, this. Took the words out of my mouth. :
: Are you extra aware of it? I'm on a college campus so even though I don't leave my room much when I do I see plenty of PDA myself. Usually, I don't think they're very focused on you, they're a little busy. Once you get used to it it's less uncomfortable, I saw a lot (more) in high school than here, so for me it's just a normal thing. Just don't stare and everything will be fine Not only that, but I also keep having the pleasure of the company of females, knowing full well that absolutely nothing will come of it! I'm more of a literal chick magnet than a metaphorical chick magnet:
Hmm, the only solution I see here is to become literal chick repellent. Then, you'll be a metaphoric chick magnet! That's how it works, right?
DeadmanWalking
Well-known member
Hey, I keep track of what I say on here!
Also, my mother has been down my throat about how I "need to be aware of my surroundings". So, I did, and now, I'm too aware of my surroundings::. I can't help staring at it; the lonely part of me looks because it wishes it could experience the same thing and I just naturally have wandering eyes! If I could stop, I would, trust me. But, it's too in my face and my eyes go everywhere, as I explained earlier. Now, if you could disable that function of mine, I would greatly appreciate it.
Also, my mother has been down my throat about how I "need to be aware of my surroundings". So, I did, and now, I'm too aware of my surroundings:
:. I can't help staring at it; the lonely part of me looks because it wishes it could experience the same thing and I just naturally have wandering eyes! If I could stop, I would, trust me. But, it's too in my face and my eyes go everywhere, as I explained earlier. Now, if you could disable that function of mine, I would greatly appreciate it.
MollyBeGood
Well-known member
discouraged and disappointed.wanting to hide in bed realizing every time I fool myself into having hope about a situation I put myself in it's is not too long before the reality of it is all too real. Ah f*** that's depressing. sorry
DeadmanWalking
Well-known member
狼;539097 said:discouraged and disappointed.wanting to hide in bed realizing every time I fool myself into having hope about a situation I put myself in it's is not too long before the reality of it is all too real. Ah f*** that's depressing. sorry
Hm? What do you mean by that? Do you mean having hope about a social situation not falling to pieces? If that's what you mean, then hope is something very important in that case. Without hope, then the chances of failure become almost absolute, due to the whole "self-fulfilling prophecy" thing. If we hope, then we at least have some chance at victory. I hope that you feel better and find the energy in you to try again. For right now, rest yourself and don't worry about your post being depressing. This thread is meant for you to get things off of your chest so that you can start on the road to recovery
.
MikeyC
Well-known member
There's nothing wrong with looking, as long as you're not staring.Hey, I keep track of what I say on here!
Also, my mother has been down my throat about how I "need to be aware of my surroundings". So, I did, and now, I'm too aware of my surroundings:
Yeah, that's very depressing. What situation are you referring to?狼;539097 said:discouraged and disappointed.wanting to hide in bed realizing every time I fool myself into having hope about a situation I put myself in it's is not too long before the reality of it is all too real. Ah f*** that's depressing. sorry
Walking a fine line between a mental buzz and a mental buzz kill.
tailwagger
Member
Stressed, a bit upset. I don't trust a friend of mine who I constantly have to give money too for his "painkiller". I am sick of giving up all my money.
Insanewoman389
Well-known member
I'm shaking, sobbing, and feel very nauseous. I miss my mom and I'm terrified of the day I have to move out and that's all I can think about now and i just feel terrible I wish it would go away. I just God all I wanna do right now is sob to death and I really wish she would come home but she won't be back for days :/
MikeyC
Well-known member
Yeeeah, that sounds a little dodgy. Even if it were true, he should be repaying you somehow. Is he at least appreciative?
It really sounds like you have separation anxiety. That's not a good thing and it's best to get that treated sooner rather than later.
this_portrait
Well-known member
Groggy and wishing I could've slept for longer. Meh.
LadyWench
Well-known member
Pretty terrible. I've been having severe panic attacks lately. I've always had panic disorder, but I don't understand why they are happening so frequently right now. Just thinking about it sets one off. I'm feeling quite miserable from this and don't know what to do.