Would you listen to a pickupartist ?
- Thread starter Bo592
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I'd listen to this pick up artist:
PUA is a bad joke, don't waste your time with that.
PUA is a bad joke, don't waste your time with that.
rosewood
Well-known member
would you want to date someone who is horrible to you?
its called Push Pull conversation.
the guy who is really good at it will go in with a compliment and the girl will respond with a thank you, etc. then the guy comes back with a nasty backhanded compliment diguised as part of the conversation. you can tell when its working because the girls face will instantly reflect the horror from the surprise insult and confusion. confusion because the guy smiles when he say the horrible insult. it serves to undermine the person and yank the rug out from underneath them mentally.
it is a manipulation tactic, and it considered abuse.
typically two other factors are employed:
flashy clothes, and and a need to dominate the conversation.
its all manipulation. and its abuse.
because it relies on decieving and controlling the listener.
its called Push Pull conversation.
the guy who is really good at it will go in with a compliment and the girl will respond with a thank you, etc. then the guy comes back with a nasty backhanded compliment diguised as part of the conversation. you can tell when its working because the girls face will instantly reflect the horror from the surprise insult and confusion. confusion because the guy smiles when he say the horrible insult. it serves to undermine the person and yank the rug out from underneath them mentally.
it is a manipulation tactic, and it considered abuse.
typically two other factors are employed:
flashy clothes, and and a need to dominate the conversation.
its all manipulation. and its abuse.
because it relies on decieving and controlling the listener.
MikeyC
Well-known member
"Negging" is terrible and guys that do it really should be ashamed of themselves. It means that they have to try backhanded tactics to pick up women because their personality is awful to begin with.
There you go. The girls wised up.
FallenFeathers
Well-known member
No.
I dont feel it's being honest, it feels too much like treating females as some sort of animal you can trick.
It might work, and who am I to judge really, but id prefer to be rejected a lot of times for being me, than accepted for acting like someone im not. And im not someone willing to use reverse psychology to score notches on my bed post.
I dont feel it's being honest, it feels too much like treating females as some sort of animal you can trick.
It might work, and who am I to judge really, but id prefer to be rejected a lot of times for being me, than accepted for acting like someone im not. And im not someone willing to use reverse psychology to score notches on my bed post.
Urban Dictionary: neg
I think negging only works only on certain girls, perhaps those who are insecure or have big egos.
Diend
Well-known member
I went through a PUA phase where my end goal was to learn at least a little bit of social skills - not even ways to flirt - just how to talk to women in general. A month later, I told myself I did not need a woman in my life. Maybe you're at that point where society suggests you get into a relationship, but imagine all the baggage in exchange for sex. Technically, if you don't need a companion to fulfill the bare necessities, you're using her for sex and perhaps feeling superior to your single male friends, but realize all the baggage that comes with being in a relationship. For example, needing to listen to her problems, and accompanying her to events. All the time to yourself would be cut by at least half. This is just my theory as most virgins enjoy doing. Theorizing about women.
MikeyC
Well-known member
Very much agreed.
Odo
Banned
Sometimes I think that they make it harder to just be nice or that they 'ruin' girls for other guys, but to be honest I'm still not convinced that just being nice would work. Women will be friends with you if you're sweet and might sleep with you if they're in the mood, but for actual long-term relationships they're pretty demanding and you really have to bring a lot to the table... and to be honest, it's not very often where I meet someone and feel like it's worth the effort, or like I could even begin to fulfill her expectations once I stop putting so much effort into impressing her/trying to be what she wants me to be.
I'm not going to defend these PUA people, but I do understand where they're coming from-- a lot of them aren't so different from me. They're mostly just normal guys who are sick of being rejected after trying things the 'normal way', so they try to score by being douchebags.
They're the same guys who probably would have been able to do pretty well for themselves in the 50s, back when women couldn't actually support themselves, but now find themselves pushed aside and in many cases making less money than the women who still expect them to 'be the man'... so the way they see it, they're faced with a choice-- either do the PUA schtick and score a lot of empty encounters that alleviate your boredom and bolster your ego, or allow yourself to be rejected over and over and over until you die alone and full of regrets.
I'm not going to defend these PUA people, but I do understand where they're coming from-- a lot of them aren't so different from me. They're mostly just normal guys who are sick of being rejected after trying things the 'normal way', so they try to score by being douchebags.
They're the same guys who probably would have been able to do pretty well for themselves in the 50s, back when women couldn't actually support themselves, but now find themselves pushed aside and in many cases making less money than the women who still expect them to 'be the man'... so the way they see it, they're faced with a choice-- either do the PUA schtick and score a lot of empty encounters that alleviate your boredom and bolster your ego, or allow yourself to be rejected over and over and over until you die alone and full of regrets.
this_portrait
Well-known member
I got messaged by a pickup artist on a dating site before, twice. It was the same guy, and he sent the same message to me one year and then the next.
The entire concept strikes me as complete bull, and I really feel that you'd have to be a complete sheep to fall for it. I don't know if this says more about me or the women who buy into it.
The entire concept strikes me as complete bull, and I really feel that you'd have to be a complete sheep to fall for it. I don't know if this says more about me or the women who buy into it.
zen_mistress
Well-known member
I find PUA stuff sickening. I like people who are honest and kind, and PUA is the opposite of that.
zen_mistress
Well-known member
And it is such a complicated system to learn. Wouldnt it be easier just to talk to women like they are, I don't know, people? And not put them on a pedestal or play mind games with them.
Odo
Banned
I guess not.
I read a book about this by Strauss, it was interesting - some stuff I've seen in RL before and it kinda 'worked' (those guys probably did it just by intuition though) - but as others have said, it can be seen as manipulation and may end up badly too...
for someone completely clueless, some stuff perhaps can be helpful, the 'negging' can also be just playful banter, just teasing and joking - humor is usually welcome, if not overdone
Coyote could possibly write his own book about this lol!
The big problem is the men in PUA program may start seeing women as just 'objects' and 'numbers', and bury the real self under 'techniques' - so you don't know if she likes you for you or for the techniques? Respect for women (withut idealizing them too much) is very important, I'd like to see programs teach THAT!
for someone completely clueless, some stuff perhaps can be helpful, the 'negging' can also be just playful banter, just teasing and joking - humor is usually welcome, if not overdone
Coyote could possibly write his own book about this lol!
The big problem is the men in PUA program may start seeing women as just 'objects' and 'numbers', and bury the real self under 'techniques' - so you don't know if she likes you for you or for the techniques? Respect for women (withut idealizing them too much) is very important, I'd like to see programs teach THAT!