Would you listen to a pickupartist ?

[Bo592]

I read a book about this by Strauss, it was interesting - some stuff I've seen in RL before and it kinda 'worked' (those guys probably did it just by intuition though) - but as others have said, it can be seen as manipulation and may end up badly too...

for someone completely clueless, some stuff perhaps can be helpful, the 'negging' can also be just playful banter, just teasing and joking - humor is usually welcome, if not overdone

Coyote could possibly write his own book about this lol!

The big problem is the men in PUA program may start seeing women as just 'objects' and 'numbers', and bury the real self under 'techniques' - so you don't know if she likes you for you or for the techniques? Respect for women (withut idealizing them too much) is very important, I'd like to see programs teach THAT!

I got interested in learning more about PUA skills because of my Social Phobia problems and I felt that they where teaching these men to get women by breaking down social skills and explaining them better after all that is guys biggest problem why we can not get a girlfriend is because of our poor social skills. I felt by studying them they would help me solve MY Social problems.

 

[Bo592]

Sometimes I think that they make it harder to just be nice or that they 'ruin' girls for other guys, but to be honest I'm still not convinced that just being nice would work. Women will be friends with you if you're sweet and might sleep with you if they're in the mood, but for actual long-term relationships they're pretty demanding and you really have to bring a lot to the table... and to be honest, it's not very often where I meet someone and feel like it's worth the effort, or like I could even begin to fulfill her expectations once I stop putting so much effort into impressing her/trying to be what she wants me to be.

I'm not going to defend these PUA people, but I do understand where they're coming from-- a lot of them aren't so different from me. They're mostly just normal guys who are sick of being rejected after trying things the 'normal way', so they try to score by being douchebags.

They're the same guys who probably would have been able to do pretty well for themselves in the 50s, back when women couldn't actually support themselves, but now find themselves pushed aside and in many cases making less money than the women who still expect them to 'be the man'... so the way they see it, they're faced with a choice-- either do the PUA schtick and score a lot of empty encounters that alleviate your boredom and bolster your ego, or allow yourself to be rejected over and over and over until you die alone and full of regrets.

I believe anything can happen when finding a mate I see PUA rules as more as guidelines then rules as woman are still people with there own choices.

 

[Honda]

Pua market is full of shit.. they target socially awkward and insecure men, whoare easy prey and teach them some useful stuff and a bunch of crap.. it is categorised as life coaching but some life coaches provide mature and useful advice that allows people to become better..

I went into meeting fresh puas for a whole year and i found it the most awkward thing i ever did in life. You meet socially awkward people and sexually frustrated freaks that would be willing to look like morons just to get a girls number.. lame shit but i learned a few things... but most puas are con artists who are full of shit, some walk you to a club, pay some prostitutes for you to approach and feel like a million dollars thinking you are the shit, didnt happen to me but its known.

The only way you will meet and approach women is if you are secure about yourself and life, in other words you build yourself and life..

 

[zen_mistress]

^ Agreed.