Will A Woman Ever Ask ME Out?

[Kiwong]

It does happen sometimes. But she isn't likely to bust down your door and walk into your room to do so.

Sometimes When We Touch - Dan Hill - Official Video 1994 - YouTube

 

[Bronson99]

You have a better chance of getting struck by lightning than a woman approaching you.

It depends. In all seriousness, how you define an approach? What needs to happen for it to count as a genuine approach?

 

[HexNoir]

My first girlfriend ever asked me out. I guess she could tell that was literally the only way to get the ball rolling!

(so yeah, it does happen. We were also adults)

 

[PheonixBomb]

You have a better chance of getting struck by lightning than a woman approaching you.

I sadly would have to agree with this. Maybe I'm just cynical though...

 

[Zaki]

Sometimes I wish I had the balls to ask out a guy I find attractive. I find sooo many of them attractive. I could NEVER work up that kind of nerve though. I would have to get far more comfortable around guys in general before I could even imagine doing such a thing. In addition, I tend to think that the more attractive a guy is, the lower the likelihood he would be interested in me.
Now I'm sorry to say that if you're waiting around for a woman to approach you, you might as well load up on books, DVDs and snacks in the meantime. You'll want to have many options on hand to keep you occupied. I suggest you keep a blanket nearby too, because you're going to get mighty sleepy. I'm not trying to be a smartass, either. It just seems rare for women to take that initiative in a society that places such great pressure on men to make the first move and confidently pursue women in whom they are romantically interested. Of course, there's no law that prevents women from asking men out, but they aren't expected to do so. I suppose that men who are celebrities/known for their money or status and those who are exceptionally good-looking may have a somewhat higher chance than others. Even then...:idontknow:

 

[ukmale]

I have come to the conclusion that the only time I will be able to "date" or have a "relationship" is if a woman asks ME out. Part of my demented brain tells me that this is the only way it will work.

Life is fascinating. And boring.

I feel like I can never have a rship I have only gotta hurt badly in the past and so feel that I was born a broken freak and so there is no point what so ever in me dating or trying to ask a women out mostly all girls are size queens and I will never match up to there dream guy so there is no point in trying no more as I only badly get hurt so I will forever always will be looking from the outside inwards sadly

 

[MikeyC]

In addition, I tend to think that the more attractive a guy is, the lower the likelihood he would be interested in me.

Ha, I have the same thoughts with women. Although, Zaki, you just never know! I know you have terrifying thoughts of men, but if you can ask a nice one out, that would be great.

Now I'm sorry to say that if you're waiting around for a woman to approach you, you might as well load up on books, DVDs and snacks in the meantime. You'll want to have many options on hand to keep you occupied. I suggest you keep a blanket nearby too, because you're going to get mighty sleepy. I'm not trying to be a smartass, either. It just seems rare for women to take that initiative in a society that places such great pressure on men to make the first move and confidently pursue women in whom they are romantically interested. Of course, there's no law that prevents women from asking men out, but they aren't expected to do so. I suppose that men who are celebrities/known for their money or status and those who are exceptionally good-looking may have a somewhat higher chance than others. Even then...:idontknow:

Aw, man. So this means I'll have to do all the chasing? Can't I just sit back with my grapes and have the ladies approach me? :bigsmile:

I have been approached a couple of times, though - one in particular I'll kick myself for not following through with - so it does happen. :thumbup:

 

[Kiwong]

Once a woman asked if I wanted to go to the bar at a University after I finished work. She was nice enough, we had a bit of chat. Bars were never my thing, and I didn't want to go. I said I needed to go home. She wouldn't talk to me the next day.

I was asked once by a woman to accompany her into into a bar, because she didn't want to enter alone. :question: I told her I was feeling unwell and declined, wishing her good luck.

And there was that lady at a rock concert, who came up behind me to dance, and then fell flat on her back, because she had a few too many to drink.

 

[oddOne]

Sometimes I wish I had the balls to ask out a guy I find attractive. I find sooo many of them attractive. I could NEVER work up that kind of nerve though. I would have to get far more comfortable around guys in general before I could even imagine doing such a thing. In addition, I tend to think that the more attractive a guy is, the lower the likelihood he would be interested in me.
Now I'm sorry to say that if you're waiting around for a woman to approach you, you might as well load up on books, DVDs and snacks in the meantime. You'll want to have many options on hand to keep you occupied. I suggest you keep a blanket nearby too, because you're going to get mighty sleepy. I'm not trying to be a smartass, either. It just seems rare for women to take that initiative in a society that places such great pressure on men to make the first move and confidently pursue women in whom they are romantically interested. Of course, there's no law that prevents women from asking men out, but they aren't expected to do so. I suppose that men who are celebrities/known for their money or status and those who are exceptionally good-looking may have a somewhat higher chance than others. Even then...:idontknow:

. . . surprised nobody has picked you up yet . . . certainly seem like what I'd call a "home run" in terms of compatibility (relatable, doesn't self-pity, has a developed personality, capable of articulating her thoughts) . . . must be SOMETHING going on . . . you 6 foot tall and/or have a super intimidating glare?

 

[I'm Not There]

I have been approached a couple of times, though - one in particular I'll kick myself for not following through with - so it does happen. :thumbup:

It did happen to you because you're an attractive guy; girls on this site have told you that numerous times and it's true. If a guy has no social skills, girls can only judge him by the way he looks and will only approach him if they think he's good looking. Girls simply have no reason to approach not so good looking guys who are unable to convey their personality to them. It's a harsh truth, but that's just the way it is - if nature hasn't blessed you with good looks, it's all up to you.

 

[coyote]

It did happen to you because you're an attractive guy; girls on this site have told you that numerous times and it's true. If a guy has no social skills, girls can only judge him by the way he looks and will only approach him if they think he's good looking. Girls simply have no reason to approach not so good looking guys who are unable to convey their personality to them. It's a harsh truth, but that's just the way it is - if nature hasn't blessed you with good looks, it's all up to you.

yeah, but...

if you're too good looking, most of the shyer girls are too intimidated to approach you

:sad:

 

[MikeyC]

It did happen to you because you're an attractive guy; girls on this site have told you that numerous times and it's true. If a guy has no social skills, girls can only judge him by the way he looks and will only approach him if they think he's good looking. Girls simply have no reason to approach not so good looking guys who are unable to convey their personality to them. It's a harsh truth, but that's just the way it is - if nature hasn't blessed you with good looks, it's all up to you.

Thanks for the compliments, but I honestly don't see it. I would have more luck in my local area if that was the case. :idontknow:

What you're talking about probably has to come down to taking a risk. Sure, asking a girl out is the ultimate "all or nothing" play, but it's unfortunately the only play we really have. You just need 20 seconds or less of pure confidence to make it happen - something a lot of us can't muster, even men without social anxiety.

yeah, but...

if you're too good looking, most of the shyer girls are too intimidated to approach you

:sad:

Has this happened to you?

 

[Kiwong]

Hahaha. That's why women haven't approached me, too good looking. I think in my case they just weren't all that interested.

 

[oddOne]

yeah, but...

if you're too good looking, most of the shyer girls are too intimidated to approach you

:sad:

. . . but there's still the forward outgoing types that do all the work for me! . . . the sort that go after the sullen, understated man whose words are few but meaningful . . . hey, I just scratched together a Lifetime Saturday morning special!

 

[Bronson99]

. . . but there's still the forward outgoing types that do all the work for me! . . . the sort that go after the sullen, understated man whose words are few but meaningful . . . hey, I just scratched together a Lifetime Saturday morning special!

Where do you run into these types?

 

[MollyBeGood]

LOL @ Oddone

"Lifetime. Television for women"

wtf

I like the murder shows on it ok, the rest is Crap with a capital "C"

 

[oddOne]

Where do you run into these types?

Around me and not you, obviously . . . but in case you're really asking this [sans the snark], these women exist in the form of secretaries/receptionists and HR girls, not exactly difficult to track down.

 

[coyote]

Has this happened to you?

yes, all too often :sad:

 

[Bronson99]

Around me and not you, obviously . . . but in case you're really asking this [sans the snark], these women exist in the form of secretaries/receptionists and HR girls, not exactly difficult to track down.

Okay. But why wouldn't they be around me?

 

[oddOne]

Okay. But why wouldn't they be around me?

Your questions hurt my brain; stop being so inquisitive . . . oh wait, I'm the same way... Hmm...

Anyway, there's either an unaccounted for variable or I'm doing a sh!t job of describing the "situation." It is a good question. Perhaps my anxiety is more "generalized" and not as specific to socializing as yours is. Really, that's likely it.