Why do people like life so much?

[jc972]

I like to believe that at death I'm greeted with a feast and an orgy as a congratulations for completing life.

Food and casual sex in the afterlife? Sign me up!

 

[Kiwong]

That's true, too. I'd be an old man at my age. No thanks.


I like to believe that at death I'm greeted with a feast and an orgy as a congratulations for completing life.

I'd be dead already.

 

[Solitudes_Grace]

I'm pretty sure most people are pretty miserable. I don't think very many people can honestly say that they "like life."

 

[MikeyC]

I'm pretty sure most people are pretty miserable. I don't think very many people can honestly say that they "like life."

I disagree. I think a lot of people are actually quite happy. My best friend loves life and takes it on with passion and humour. I envy his mind.

 

[Solitudes_Grace]

I disagree. I think a lot of people are actually quite happy. My best friend loves life and takes it on with passion and humour. I envy his mind.

I didn't say "a lot." I said "most." Also, your friend is only one person.

 

[MikeyC]

I didn't say "a lot." I said "most." Also, your friend is only one person.

Okay, I know my theorem isn't totally foolproof. I'm just saying that I do know a guy who genuinely enjoys life and living and all that it entails.

I think my brother is the same to an extent. He's not broken down by the weight of the world, no matter what. I wonder how he does that. :thinking:

 

[skins]

Life isn't supposed to be enjoyable. Having free time to pursue hobbies is a pretty modern concept. For the vast majority of humankind throughout history, life has been a simple matter of survival. It is only in the past couple hundred years that anyone has felt entitled to free time and enjoyment. We have traded in around-the-clock hunting, house-building, farming, back breaking labor and homesteading for sit down office jobs, hour-long commutes, gym memberships, and dentist appointments.
I'm not really sure what my point is, I just want to point out that it's not all that bad, and you probably have much more to be thankful for than you realize.

actually, leisure time is far more limited now then what it has been throughout the majority of human civilisation. its a relatively recent thing that we find ourselves slaves to work for much of the day. yes in hunter-gather times many hours of the day were spent finding resources for survival but the evidence shows a balanced or even greater time spent on leisure time. Strengthening social bonds within the group or what we would call "family time" was much more frequent then what it is now. Certainly not 8-10 hours a day were spent finding food, and this is also reflected in chimpanzee societies. And even then the finding of food activities would have been an enjoyable social event anyway and not a terrible chore like some of our jobs are...this is why suicide rates are the way they are today...it was probably quite uncommon in those times.

 

[Bronson99]

First world people who have not been able to reach any kind of "first world normality" with the milestones at appropriate ages are going to be left desirous and lonely. Fact.

Not many of these folks will have enough life experience to put it all in perspective and find that they really live a "great life." I suppose if that understanding happens, it happens late in life, or after having serious health problems.

In the meantime, my friend has had 10 girlfriends and making 70k per year and he says he puts no effort into it. Just last night he had 6 vodka martinis but had no hangover today, and he got through the business meeting in flying colors. One time he was drunk when he had to take a college exam, found out he got a "B" but didn't remember he even took the exam.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

It doesn't sound like you like your job at all. Don't stay there being bored all the time! At least work less hours and take up another job to make up the difference money wise.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

In the meantime, my friend has had 10 girlfriends and making 70k per year and he says he puts no effort into it. Just last night he had 6 vodka martinis but had no hangover today, and he got through the business meeting in flying colors. One time he was drunk when he had to take a college exam, found out he got a "B" but didn't remember he even took the exam.[/quote]

holy crap lol

 

[Kiwong]

I'm 51, and running out of years. I like life enough to want to hang around.

 

[MikeyC]

I'm 51, and running out of years. I like life enough to want to hang around.

I'd like you to hang around enough so we can meet up for a coffee or something.

 

[Kiwong]

I'd like you to hang around enough so we can meet up for a coffee or something.

Yeah, we'll have to meet up before my decline really sets in. It would be no fun hanging out with me using a walking frame.

 

[MikeyC]

Yeah, we'll have to meet up before my decline really sets in. It would be no fun hanging out with me using a walking frame.

Or...it could be hilarious.

 

[Kiwong]

Or...it could be hilarious.

Mobile scooter chase through the mall :thumbup:

 

[MikeyC]

Mobile scooter chase through the mall :thumbup:

At the dizzying speeds of 5kph. :thumbup:

 

[Rumplestiltskin]

Thank you all for your insightful replies. Brace yourself, for this one's going to be long. I hope my opinions don't bother you. I just need to get it all out sometimes.

This isn't a thread about life, it's a thread about you.

What I wrote is not a description of my life (that'd be this), but a description of most people's lives. I even left having children out of the equation, which leaves you with even less time for yourself.

Other people like their lives.

I know. That's what I don't get and why I started this thread.

I like my life. Sure, there are problems every now and then, but nearly everything is better than not existing at all.

Not existing at all is... well, not existing at all. It can't be defined as good or bad, because it's nothing per se.

A job is a choice. To have money to buy pretty things and live on your own and have peace and quiet (hopefully).
Having a dog is a choice too.

Like other posters have said, a job is not a choice. Either you enter the capitalist wheel or you die alone in the streets.

If you're unhappy with your job you could try to make it more interesting or likeable, or try looking for another one, more meaningful to you?

To get a good job you need 1. skills, 2. a paper that proves you've got those skills, 3. experience. I have none of those things, so I'm only eligible for shitty jobs (and nowadays not even that, what with the crisis and stuff).

What would you rather your life look like? (besides being filthy rich, which is unlikely to happen)

I don't even know what I'd like my life to look like. Or, rather, I know, but it's all pure idealism, so there go my hopes and dreams.

If the main issue is boredom... find ways to make it not boring? That's very doable, I think.

Having a fun a job doesn't seem very doable, I'm afraid. And, since your job takes up most of your life, if it happens to be boring, then your life's inevitably boring too.

I'm currently having a hard time understanding how people enjoy life. Not because I'm bored (maybe just a little) but because life for me is just anxiety and stress that I can't handle, and I'd rather not exist than have to put up with it anymore.

My frustratrion and sadness might arise exclusively from this, but then I look at many other people's lives and they don't seem all that attractive to me.

There are always possibilities and fun things to do or discover. You could join a cult, win the lottery, get a penpal, paint your walls purple.

Winning the lottery seems like the only thing that could make me not want to die.

I have in the past quit jobs with the intention of finding a more fulfilling way to live, I have all these ideas about what I could do but then lack the motivation, direction and decision making skills, to put a plan into action. After the first few days of freedom, I'll end up sitting at home slightly on edge and overwhelmed for a few weeks until the fear of running out of savings forces me to start applying for the same sort of job I had before.
I was thinking about this the other day actually, I know that life could be much more inspiring, but I don't really know how to make the switch exactly.

Well, it's a very good thing that you at least know what would make you feel more fulfilled. I say go for it.

If you don't like your job, go get another one.

Easy-peasy, yeah. Come on...

I suppose the fact that a few years ago I faced my mortality front on, I appreciate life and my good physical health even more. There's nothing like living in pain, that makes you realise how good life is when the physical pain is gone.

Physical pain is terrible and being relieved from it feels incredibly good. Then comes another type of pain.

I didn't say it's that easy. But you can do it. If you can get a new job, but won't, and still complain about it... :idontknow:

There comes a time in your life when you don't get to choose your job. You just have to take whatever brings food to your table.

This sounds like the whole reason why you're so upset about life: your job is taking up far too much of your time and you're not free to do the things you want to do. Are there ways to get out of this job into something more meaningful for you? What do you want to do?

As said before, I don't even know it. The only thing I feel I want is for me to disappear.

People from all backgrounds like life. I suppose it depends what they want out of it. Having the confidence to go for it does help, too.

Confidence is crucial, agreed. But not everyone's found in a position where they can have it.

Life isn't supposed to be enjoyable. Having free time to pursue hobbies is a pretty modern concept. For the vast majority of humankind throughout history, life has been a simple matter of survival. It is only in the past couple hundred years that anyone has felt entitled to free time and enjoyment. We have traded in around-the-clock hunting, house-building, farming, back breaking labor and homesteading for sit down office jobs, hour-long commutes, gym memberships, and dentist appointments.
I'm not really sure what my point is, I just want to point out that it's not all that bad, and you probably have much more to be thankful for than you realize.

All of this doesn't alter the fact that if your life here and now is made up of 80% work/stress/worries/anxiety/uncertainty and only 20% fun you should have no reason to like it or appreciate it. How would you rate a 100-minute-long movie if you were bored for 80 minutes of it?

In the past suffering from a mental illness was not even acknowledged.

Nowadays SP might be officially acknowledged in those big chunky books in shrink's offices, but it remains a taboo in society. You're not going to have your life straightened out in any way just because you have a psychological disorder.

If you're unlucky enough to have an issue that prevents you from being confident (and this goes especially for men), then of course you are not always going to be content, not when you see how "the average guy" is going places and getting things done, and seemingly not even breaking a sweat doing it. And you get to sit back and watch and wonder why even your most extreme effort is not quite enough for you to go with the flow and reach something approaching "normal." Some of us have to take the emotional pain of never having had a girlfriend or sometimes not even a single date, accept loneliness as the default state... and then come onto forums like this and be told your life is simply fantastic anyway.

Meanwhile, the rest of the world either criticizes you for not trying, laughs at you or feels sorry for you. I don't know which one's worse.

I don't know if you were referring to my post, but I certainly was not saying that everyone's life is fantastic because they live in this modern age. Quite the opposite. I'm saying that life has never been easy or happy for the majority of people and we have no reason to believe it should be now. If anything, we as a society are more miserable now because we feel entitled to free time and other such luxuries, whereas before average people didn't even think to expect these things out of life. I think we could all do with a great deal less expectation and entitlement in our lives.

So you're proposing we should accept whatever life throws at us just because it's always been like this, right? What's the reasoning behind focusing only on whoever's lived worse than you instead of looking up to and envying those who're better? Why aren't we all entitled to frustration and resentment?

I think I read that hunter/gatherers got all their hunting and gathering out of the way in about 4 hours and spent the rest of the day mucking around and having fun

I've also heard that a few times. So much for human evolution.

First world problems, worrying about not having a girl friend. The affluence of dating problems. Those being killed by the plague, or influenza didn't have that luxury. Will I be killed on my 16 hour day working down a coal mine? I might be sent to a convict colony for stealing a loaf of bread. I wonder if they have the internet on board? Maybe I will just jump on the computer and check out plenty of fish?

You've never had a girlfriend. You start hating yourself. You lose all confidence in yourself. You don't feel capable of anything. You can't even get out of your house for fear of girls laughing at you. You go through a lot of trouble when trying to get a job. You're rejected at any new job you start. [...]

Sure, all of this is way better than the execrable misery you describe, but first world problems are still problems.

Not many of these folks will have enough life experience to put it all in perspective and find that they really live a "great life." I suppose if that understanding happens, it happens late in life, or after having serious health problems.

I wonder if a near-death experience would make me appreciate life more.

I hope I don't need to find that out for myself, though.

 

[Silatuyok]

So you're proposing we should accept whatever life throws at us just because it's always been like this, right? What's the reasoning behind focusing only on whoever's lived worse than you instead of looking up to and envying those who're better? Why aren't we all entitled to frustration and resentment?

You are more than welcome to feel all the frustration and resentment in the world. But life tends to be a little more enjoyable if you do what you can to make the best out of it. I guess I just don't know what else to tell you.

 

[S_Spartan]

In the meantime, my friend has had 10 girlfriends and making 70k per year and he says he puts no effort into it. Just last night he had 6 vodka martinis but had no hangover today, and he got through the business meeting in flying colors. One time he was drunk when he had to take a college exam, found out he got a "B" but didn't remember he even took the exam.

I refer to these types of people as "blessed". They came out of the womb and fit perfectly into society like a puzzle piece and society rewards them for it!

 

[S_Spartan]

I guess I just don't know what else to tell you.

And that is the problem with this problem. There really are no easy answers. That is why it is called the "dark night of the soul." I experience this every day and it has changed me over the last few years. It is really the death of the ego because in this day and age the ego is everything. Career, degrees, credentials, good looking spouse and kids, nice house and car, all ego...but it is what we are told that matters most. Our gods, so to speak. So when internal and external forces keep you from those things the ego starts screaming because it wants those things! It craves recognition for a sense of purpose.
When one enters the dark night of the soul the ego gives up and with that so does the person's identity. You no longer know who you really are anymore or how you relate to the outside world.