Where to find permanent happiness?

[sullyS25]

You said before that you believe everything happens for a reason but still didn´t say what reason you mean. You also said before that you don´t see death as a bad thing, but now you admit killing is bad, but as the world is of a dualistic nature, bad things are inevitable and part of life so we have to accept them and this will allow us to be happy. Is just "feeling happy" this reason that you meant - why everything happens?

And is there any (higher) reason to the death of those animals (when death is not wrong for you)? Isn´t this unfair that some people (like you) who have favorable conditions in life can feel happy and for example these animals who are trapped have no such opportunity? I think it is easy for you now to talk the way you do because you feel good (at least ATM) and when we feel good we see everything as good and perfect (when in fact it is not). It is said when people take heroin they feel happy and one with the world and feel like everything in life is allright and if not, it will be. (I feel similary when I take opioid painkillers). But to me this is no more than FEELING.. higher reason or purpose of life - no. Because this can change, imagine yourself on the place of those animals - without hope, trapped, in pain, facing cruel inhuman death soon. It is nice and easy to philosophise the way you do when you yourself are safe and warm..

I remember there was once a funny show.. a girl came home from work furious, that the boss is an idiot. Her acquaintance had his head full of some spiritual teaching, telling her that she is not positive enough and that everything is perfect, that she has to accept things the way they are. The show ended when this acquaintance discovered the same boss was cheating with his wife. He lost his cool immediately.. . So, everything is perfect until it happens to us.

No matter what I say you will not read it fully or you will respond with something else to argue about....You rant reading what I am saying. If you were you wouldn't have asked the same question three times after I told you I do not know the answer.

I have also never said I feel good, you have assumed that as well when in fact I have felt a bit lonely an bored the past few months. You make it completely evident you are not reading what I am saying when you mention being high on heroin. I have been high on Heroin, I was addicted to it, other opiates and alcohol....today I am 15 months sober.....I mentioned being a drug addict earlier, if you had read what I was writing you would have known this.

I refuse to say anymore. There is a point in a conversation where two people don't ever listen to what the other are saying because they are so busy defending themselves....That point has long passed.....to continue talking about it is ridiculous and a waste of time.

I refuse to continue this talk with you

 

[Lea]

No matter what I say you will not read it fully or you will respond with something else to argue about....You rant reading what I am saying. If you were you wouldn't have asked the same question three times after I told you I do not know the answer.

I have also never said I feel good, you have assumed that as well when in fact I have felt a bit lonely an bored the past few months. You make it completely evident you are not reading what I am saying when you mention being high on heroin. I have been high on Heroin, I was addicted to it, other opiates and alcohol....today I am 15 months sober.....I mentioned being a drug addict earlier, if you had read what I was writing you would have known this.

I refuse to say anymore. There is a point in a conversation where two people don't ever listen to what the other are saying because they are so busy defending themselves....That point has long passed.....to continue talking about it is ridiculous and a waste of time.

I refuse to continue this talk with you

Ah that´s the best solution if you don´t have the answers. I can only say I have read fully your posts and know also you said you had problems with drugs. I don´t know though why you think I should have avoided talking about drugs just because you took some. I didn´t even think about you when I was saying that example. I just thought it could well illustrate my point so I used it. Why should it be wrong

And no I wasn´t busy defending my point, I was just busy thinking about this whole issue and wanted to get it right - maybe I got a bit entangled in my thoughts - I am not perfect and this case is quite complicated, besides english is not my native language so I am not so eloquent like most others here and I know I sound often quite awkward.

I am aware that I mentioned the "reason" several times but it wasn´t because I didn´t read your posts - only that some things in them didn´t make sense to me and I wanted to understand how you mean it. First you said you believe everything happens for a reason, and then when I ask you what reason you say you don´t know. This doesn´t make sense does it. Maybe you think "faith" is something very private and not to be analyzed and questioned, so it´s your choice to refuse to talk about it. I personally think that everything should be logically explainable.

 

[sullyS25]

Ah that´s the best solution if you don´t have the answers. I can only say I have read fully your posts and know also you said you had problems with drugs. I don´t know though why you think I should have avoided talking about drugs just because you took some. I didn´t even think about you when I was saying that example. I just thought it could well illustrate my point so I used it. Why should it be wrong

And no I wasn´t busy defending my point, I was just busy thinking about this whole issue and wanted to get it right - maybe I got a bit entangled in my thoughts - I am not perfect and this case is quite complicated, besides english is not my native language so I am not so eloquent like most others here and I know I sound often quite awkward.

I am aware that I mentioned the "reason" several times but it wasn´t because I didn´t read your posts - only that some things in them didn´t make sense to me and I wanted to understand how you mean it. First you said you believe everything happens for a reason, and then when I ask you what reason you say you don´t know. This doesn´t make sense does it. Maybe you think "faith" is something very private and not to be analyzed and questioned, so it´s your choice to refuse to talk about it. I personally think that everything should be logically explainable.

Let me say this in a few different ways so you can understand it.

I am a spiritual person which means everything happens for a reason in my mind and I do not know what that reason is because that is god's work not MINE. That is saying that GOD or MY HIGHER POWER has a plan or a REASON for everything.....If I KNEW what the REASON was for everything that happens in life I would be GOD. I TRUST IN GOD SO I BELIEVE EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. Faith is about trust. Meaning I can say everything happens for a reason and not know what that reason is because I TRUST IN GOD.

I don't even like the word god but it is easier to write out than higher power or infinite consciousness.

 

[Kiwong]

In my experience the most important influence towards making the things that happen to us is thoughts- good and bad. Thoughts are extremely powerful in determining how we feel about life circumstances and determining the life outcome.

Thoughts=dreams=actions=results

So much of life is out of our control simply chance. Thoughts leading to dreams leading to actions can lead to change. I can't sit around waiting for things to happen for a reason I have to influence that change.

 

[kilojoule]

Thoughts=dreams=actions=results

^ I like that

 

[MollyBeGood]

there's no such thing as permanent happiness or permanent anything.

 

[dottie]

well said, lea!

 

[Nl54]

Peace can only come when you are happy with yourself. If one tries to derive peace from an outside source, it will only be a temporary illusion.

 

[deleted #89]

Living with permanent happiness would be neurotic and is impossible. You need rational sadness/anger/fear to live a fulfilled life.

 

[sullyS25]

Peace can only come when you are happy with yourself. If one tries to derive peace from an outside source, it will only be a temporary illusion.

Exactly...thank you! That was the point I was trying to get across.

 

[Porto]

Probably we can find in another Universe.

Although there are people that can be happy most of the time. That doesn't means that don't have problems or someone close dies they feel happy. Just have a path of a values and support that make them handle some situation easily than others.

That just is possible with age and experience, what also means suffering. Is impossible to learn how to handle with death, without someone die. We can cross with any other experience.

 

[Nanita]

I'd prefer to live out in the woods in a cabin with 1 person I love and just enjoy the world around me rather than work a faced paced job and have more money than I can use. If I could go back and live with my ancestors (Native Americans) I would. Cities suck the happiness out of me, crowds of people, violence, the obsession with money and fame, it makes me dull and very much unhappy.

I agree with you totally!!!

 

[1BlackSheep]

I am a spiritual person which means everything happens for a reason in my mind and I do not know what that reason is because that is god's work not MINE. That is saying that GOD or MY HIGHER POWER has a plan or a REASON for everything.....If I KNEW what the REASON was for everything that happens in life I would be GOD. I TRUST IN GOD SO I BELIEVE EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. Faith is about trust. Meaning I can say everything happens for a reason and not know what that reason is because I TRUST IN GOD.

I don't even like the word god but it is easier to write out than higher power or infinite consciousness.

I understand what you're saying! I believe that everything happens as it's somehow supposed to, even though it might not make sense at the time. I've had things happen to me in earlier in life that I couldn't understand why they were happening at the time, but later made total sense. I suppose not everyone feels this way, and that's fine. To each their own!

 

[JustWannaLove]

Coming out of SA and having a stable personality. knowing who i am, being able to take care of myself and love myself, so that i can take care of and love others and offer all that i can to make them happy. and to successfully realise the path that is waiting for me in my life with a good state of mind whilst continuing to grow.

 

[JustWannaLove]

I understand what you're saying! I believe that everything happens as it's somehow supposed to, even though it might not make sense at the time. I've had things happen to me in earlier in life that I couldn't understand why they were happening at the time, but later made total sense. I suppose not everyone feels this way, and that's fine. To each their own!

i agree...my SA has made me a more thoughtful person, because i've known what it's like to feel hurt it has also taught me to watch my mouth and my actions.
before, i was an outgoing person and was quite popular in high shcool, but i made a lot of mistakes and upset people. i was a really bad person and i regret it a lot. but i've had enough time to get over it now, it's all in the past. i dont wanna be that girl ever again.

 

[MikeyC]

before, i was an outgoing person and was quite popular in high shcool, but i made a lot of mistakes and upset people. i was a really bad person and i regret it a lot. but i've had enough time to get over it now, it's all in the past. i dont wanna be that girl ever again.

At least you're woman enough to admit that, unlike some people I know.

 

[Shant]

Permanent happiness? Hoo boy. I won't even be cynical about this, just realistic.

Assuming "true" happiness is even achievable, there has to be some balance. Life sucks too much to allow anyone to stay happy all the time (unless you're a Pollyanna). Even if you're at a great point in life: Great job, great marriage, great house, etc... things happen that will shift your mood to disappointment. Maybe you work overtime, get into a family disagreement, get into an accident, whatever, there's both good and bad in life (assuming there is good).

Permanent Happiness, even if theoretically there were so many good things in life that would enable such feelings in someone, would be bad. There's no balance there. Without balance, there's not much rationale.

 

[Aletheia]

virtue is its own reward

There's no permanent anything. If there's one thing you can count on in life, it's that it changes.

Even if you could be permanently happy, you wouldn't have any contrast to make you appreciate how good you had it. And life is about a lot more than happy.

If we're talking instead about what makes a good life, I think for me it has to do with being true to myself and my own sense of integrity.