Where to find permanent happiness?
- Thread starter sullyS25
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MikeyC
Well-known member
This is absolutely true, but it's more about how a person reacts to the situation that determines how happy they are.
MsBuzzkillington
Well-known member
In a tub full of cookie dough.
Flowers-Of-Bloom
Well-known member
No such thing. Our emotions are fickle.
Lea
Banned
I agree completely.....I am not sure if I made you think I can do whatever I want thoughSorry if I did.....You mention god....for me this is more of a god issue. I may not use the word god when I talk about it but personally for me, I trust in the way things are and everything happens for a reason....That is just me though...I sense some anger in your posts, maybe it is my constant need to over analyze things and it is nothing but if I said something to upset you or posted something in the past to upset you I apologize, my intention is not to upset anyone...
No what I said before, it had nothing to do with you or your post. If it did, I would have quoted it. But yes I know I sound like a bitch most of the time. I don´t know why, maybe it´s because I am one
Weird because I tend to be convinced that deep inside I am a very good and harmless person. I don´t know why I tend to be always angry, maybe because there is so much bull**** in the world and am tired of it.. like the "positive thinking" for example. It´s such a disgusting pretense. And these people are the first to always accuse me of being negative, and dismiss me because of it, without even trying to discover what I am like really. But I don´t think I´m negative, only pessimistic which I have reasons for. But for me "negativity" means quite something different, pessimism it´s surely not.
sullyS25
Well-known member
No what I said before, it had nothing to do with you or your post. If it did, I would have quoted it. But yes I know I sound like a bitch most of the time. I don´t know why, maybe it´s because I am one
Yes, people that are always positive bother me as well....I don't consider what you say as being negative, realistic sounds better to me....I consider myself as a realist as well....I used to be a pessimist and wanted nothing to do with positive people. That is how I used to be I am not saying you are like that, I think you seem more like a realist.
Now I have learned to enjoy their positivity as long as it doesn't come across as fake or too much. People that sale to see the "negative" parts of life certainly make me feel uncomfortable as well
lonely_drummer
Well-known member
To me there is no such thing as "permanent" happiness. Its the mix of the ups and downs of all our emotions that makes us feel what we feel. Basically, if we only felt one emotion all the time, we wouldn't truly know we were happy or sad or angry, it would just be monotonous to me. The reasons why we feel any bouts of happiness is because we aren't feeling sad at that moment and we have noticed a difference, a change and it is that change which is what gives us feeling. Just like say, we were able to as humans, get rid of say the worst suffering a human could ever feel. Lets say some sort of cancer, I don't know what it would be, it doesn't matter what it is, but say we got rid of it. great now we don't have to go through that horrible suffering, but then what was the 2nd most painful thing? that will then move up and become the most painful thing you can feel. you can keep going and make it so we only suffer from head colds and thats still horrible, we will still perceive it as pain and suffering. so yeah now i forgot what i was saying, hahaha
Yeah the ups and downs. you can pretty much base that into anything in the universe. the economy is a great example. if it were just the same, there would be no growth. if permanent happiness did actually exist, i don't think i would want it
Yeah the ups and downs. you can pretty much base that into anything in the universe. the economy is a great example. if it were just the same, there would be no growth. if permanent happiness did actually exist, i don't think i would want it
SilverSky
Active member
It's hard for me think of something that makes me happy, because I spend so much time in a grey haze of being worried or anxious or just bored.
Happiness for me is always changing. It's what I care about that makes me happy, my dad recovering from surgery and being healthy, my cat snuggling with me, working out and getting stronger, a sunny day, good news in any form, a quiet walk along a river...so many things make me feel happy.
Funny thing is, a lot of people say that making a lot of money, being successful at a job, buying a house and cars, being with beautiful significant others, that those things make them happy. Maybe I'm cut from a different thread. I'd prefer to live out in the woods in a cabin with 1 person I love and just enjoy the world around me rather than work a faced paced job and have more money than I can use. If I could go back and live with my ancestors (Native Americans) I would. Cities suck the happiness out of me, crowds of people, violence, the obsession with money and fame, it makes me dull and very much unhappy.
Happiness for me is always changing. It's what I care about that makes me happy, my dad recovering from surgery and being healthy, my cat snuggling with me, working out and getting stronger, a sunny day, good news in any form, a quiet walk along a river...so many things make me feel happy.
Funny thing is, a lot of people say that making a lot of money, being successful at a job, buying a house and cars, being with beautiful significant others, that those things make them happy. Maybe I'm cut from a different thread. I'd prefer to live out in the woods in a cabin with 1 person I love and just enjoy the world around me rather than work a faced paced job and have more money than I can use. If I could go back and live with my ancestors (Native Americans) I would. Cities suck the happiness out of me, crowds of people, violence, the obsession with money and fame, it makes me dull and very much unhappy.
nafadda
Well-known member
yep,that was what gave me happiness.buying some land out in the woods and living with nature around me..having a goal and reaching it but NOT expecting it without some hard work and trying times before I got to that place.
as far as negative people vs positive people go..well negativity is fine ..to a point..BUT if EVERY word out of a persons mouth comes across as negative and they get angry if they see or hear positive,i just find those sorts as jealous or pety..as in the 'debbie downer' types..and i know some people like that and they wonder why no one wants to be around them..could it be the constant gloom and doom is just too much at time?? i don't know.i think there is something to the old 'misery loves company' thing to be honest. or some just want to hear what they want to hear and positive is not want they want to hear.
we all have anger,,i know i do at times.we all have had times when it seems like it will never get better and just too much to deal with..i know I have,but at what point do people say,ok..enough is enough and i will have a plan for change and to make me feel better...and to understand it won't happen over night.
i'm way older then a lot of people here so i can only speak from experience and because i actually listened to some older people when i was at my lowest times is why i got to a point of going out and making my own happiness instead od 'gnawing on my own liver' as someone refered to it one time..
worked for me
.now i don't worry about what others think and i live how i like and i do what makes ME happy!..then again,I never was into drama overkill.
Lea
Banned
I agree completely.....I am not sure if I made you think I can do whatever I want though
Everything happens for a reason? So for example, if you get run over by a drunken driver or hit by a meteorite or something like that, what reason it was? Is it your "bad" karma or what else? Maybe this whole incomprehensible nonsense has some reason, but I won´t know until I die and speak to the bastard St Petrus at the gate. I can´t wait asking him what was this supposed to mean.
sullyS25
Well-known member
Well I am not a religious person I am a spiritual person. To me there is a difference so this talk of St. Petrus has no meaning to me. I sense in your post that you view death as a bad thing. You imply that if I get hit by a meteor or run over by a drunk driver that I will die and that is bad.....I don't think death is a bad thing, I am not afraid of it. I don't know the will of my higher power and that is the beauty of it. I cant tell you the reason why bad things happen, if I could do that I would not need spirituality or a higher power.
To me it is sad that you describe life as incomprehensible nonsense because I used to think that way and it reminds me of how depressed I was and how I didn't want to go on living...not saying YOU are like that, that is how I was....
I used to think it was bull**** when people would say everything happens for a reason also....I would ask myself..."If everything happens for a reason what is the reason for me being a depressed alcoholic and drug addict and what is the reason for all this suffering?" or "What is the reason my brother would mock me and beat the fuc k out of me every day when I was a kid to the point where I never wanted to talk out of the fear of being mocked or beat up?"
Since I have gotten sober and found this spiritual path I can see those events have made me a stronger person now. I was living in the depths of hell and now life has reason.....to have fun and enjoy it as much as I can....I do this by living in the moment and trying to enjoy every second I have been blessed with....I am grateful for what I have...which is life or consciousness. I am grateful that I didn't die with a needle in my arm, a bottle in my hand or a shotgun in my mouth. When I am in a good place (which isn't all the time by any means), I am full of gratitude and happy to be breathing another breath.
I am sorry if you think this diatribe sounds like complete fluffy bull**** that I think life is full rainbows and butterflies. That isn't the case at all. The difference between me now from the past is that I can appreciate the positive things in life while acknowledging the negative parts, I am not always being a negative Nancy wishing I would get hit by a bus every time I wake up....I am not calling you a pessimist but I am yet to hear anything positive in your posts....I admit I haven't seen many of them but do you ever acknowledge the positive aspects of life? If not that is cool too but where I am right now personally, life is about accepting the good and the bad or accepting the duality of life and not resisting it.....
I AM NOT PREACHING EITHER, THIS IS JUST HOW I FEEL. If you don't like it I apologize, I don't expect you to feel the same way I do and I had to clear that up with capital letters.
Permanent happiness is coming soon to the end of a end of a rainbow near you
I guess I do my best to enjoy the happy times and just hope there won't be too many bad times, when the bad stuff happens, I sort of just muddle through and put my focus in the potential good ahead of me. I don't think there is any permanent happiness but I do think you can certainly have a content throughout the distresses life throws if you can utilise CBT.
I guess I do my best to enjoy the happy times and just hope there won't be too many bad times, when the bad stuff happens, I sort of just muddle through and put my focus in the potential good ahead of me. I don't think there is any permanent happiness but I do think you can certainly have a content throughout the distresses life throws if you can utilise CBT.
Lea
Banned
First of all, you have the opportunity to look up all (or most) of my posts on this forum, if you want. (if you´re not logged in you won´t see all of them though).
I still didn´t get to know any sound answer to my questions yet, except of how you feel... Feelings can be very subjective you know. And if you sense that I view death as a bad thing, you sense that wrong, because it´s not so. Death is a natural thing and part of life. What is far worse is a bad life, when people do harm to others. By this harm I mean also killing, which naturally includes death too. So for me violent death is a bad thing. If I said it is a good thing, then I wouldn´t have to be sorry for anyone who was murdered or who is in pain. Btw I know what you mean to imply, that death and suffering make your soul stronger. Yes many people say so - that it is beneficial for our evolution. BUT - what about poor animals, who have their whole lifes no choice but to be shut in cages and live is terrible conditions and at the mercy of cruel people, who in the end slit their throats in a horrible way or mutilate them, put their heads in electricity charged water, skin them alive etc etc... or let them hunger to death. What opportunity do these poor creatures have for spiritual evolution??
But people just always tend to think only of themselves and THEIR own spiritual evolution, THEIR improvement, thinking they are or will be omnipotent Gods who can control everything, instead to humble down a bit and acknowledge there are things on this earth that we cannot control. We should do our best to try, but if God or nature wanted, they can destroy us any minute and who were we :/.Here is one video, sorry if it disturbes your feeling good
HALAL not graphic like your typical video PLEASE WATCH Antitheist atheist - YouTube
emre43
Well-known member
Permanent happiness is coming soon to the end of a end of a rainbow near you
I guess I do my best to enjoy the happy times and just hope there won't be too many bad times, when the bad stuff happens, I sort of just muddle through and put my focus in the potential good ahead of me. I don't think there is any permanent happiness but I do think you can certainly have a content throughout the distresses life throws if you can utilise CBT.
I'm the same I don't let negative thoughts bother me too much and just try to enjoy the positives.
Little Miss Muffet
Well-known member
I think this is right. In Budism they said: "Whatever gives you pleasure will give you pain" so you have to be happy within without relying on outside things to make you happy.
How can there be permanant happiness? Life is so unstable, unpredictable etc its always changing. If it stayed the same we'd all get bored eventually though. Nothing in life is guaranteed.
How can there be permanant happiness? Life is so unstable, unpredictable etc its always changing. If it stayed the same we'd all get bored eventually though. Nothing in life is guaranteed.
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sullyS25
Well-known member
First of all, you have the opportunity to look up all (or most) of my posts on this forum, if you want. (if you´re not logged in you won´t see all of them though).
I still didn´t get to know any sound answer to my questions yet, except of how you feel... Feelings can be very subjective you know. And if you sense that I view death as a bad thing, you sense that wrong, because it´s not so. Death is a natural thing and part of life. What is far worse is a bad life, when people do harm to others. By this harm I mean also killing, which naturally includes death too. So for me violent death is a bad thing. If I said it is a good thing, then I wouldn´t have to be sorry for anyone who was murdered or who is in pain. Btw I know what you mean to imply, that death and suffering make your soul stronger. Yes many people say so - that it is beneficial for our evolution. BUT - what about poor animals, who have their whole lifes no choice but to be shut in cages and live is terrible conditions and at the mercy of cruel people, who in the end slit their throats in a horrible way or mutilate them, put their heads in electricity charged water, skin them alive etc etc... or let them hunger to death. What opportunity do these poor creatures have for spiritual evolution??
Did I say I am always feeling good? Did I say the world was full of happiness and good things? No. As you said there is the "good" and the "bad". I embrace both and resist neither. It appears as though all you do is resist the good in life and concentrate on the bad. That is what I am getting from your posts.
You assume my beliefs in a higher power are the same as the majority of societies and I can assure you they are not. Having faith in a higher power for me is about giving up the insane thought that I have control over anything. I do not. When I am in a spiritually fit place I do not try to control anything, I accept everything the way it is......the good and the bad....obviously I can't do this all the time but when I do I feel at peace.
Why do these animals get tortured and why is there evil in the world? Due to a collective unconsciousness and egoistic, self-seeking society. Can I do anything about this? No, not a damn thing. If there is a god or higher power that represents the good in life then by the nature of duality there has to be an opposite. I accept that.
The world is full of self-seeking people, you are right. I accept that because that is how things are. See my post entitled "Disorder of Selfishness". My spirituality is about breaking away from that feeling of separateness and feeling a part of an infinite power. It is about having empathy for others and getting out of my egoistic mind.....Do I do this to perfection? No. But when I stop separating myself from the whole...When I stop being egoistic and selfish, I don't suffer.
Torturing animals is horrible, don't think you told me or showed me something I haven't seen before. As I said that is all I ever used to be interested in.....But guess what it is happening so I accept it because that is how things are right NOW. I cannot do anything but accept it. If anyone can stop these huge corporations from torturing animals then I applaud them....I cannot. Whining about the injustices of the world does nothing for me, accepting them brings me peace.
Your question is "If everything happens for a reason, why is there so much evil in the world?" .....I do not know, I am not god....If I knew the answer to this I would be god. I have no answer, I have spirituality.
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Lea
Banned
You said before that you believe everything happens for a reason but still didn´t say what reason you mean. You also said before that you don´t see death as a bad thing, but now you admit killing is bad, but as the world is of a dualistic nature, bad things are inevitable and part of life so we have to accept them and this will allow us to be happy. Is just "feeling happy" this reason that you meant - why everything happens?
And is there any (higher) reason to the death of those animals (when death is not wrong for you)? Isn´t this unfair that some people (like you) who have favorable conditions in life can feel happy and for example these animals who are trapped have no such opportunity? I think it is easy for you now to talk the way you do because you feel good (at least ATM) and when we feel good we see everything as good and perfect (when in fact it is not). It is said when people take heroin they feel happy and one with the world and feel like everything in life is allright and if not, it will be. (I feel similary when I take opioid painkillers). But to me this is no more than FEELING.. higher reason or purpose of life - no. Because this can change, imagine yourself on the place of those animals - without hope, trapped, in pain, facing cruel inhuman death soon. It is nice and easy to philosophise the way you do when you yourself are safe and warm..
I remember there was once a funny show.. a girl came home from work furious, that the boss is an idiot. Her acquaintance had his head full of some spiritual teaching, telling her that she is not positive enough and that everything is perfect, that she has to accept things the way they are. The show ended when this acquaintance discovered the same boss was cheating with his wife. He lost his cool immediately..
. So, everything is perfect until it happens to us.
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nafadda
Well-known member
I walked outside today and saw Unicorns and rainbows..No..wait a second,that would be in a perfect world and this isn't a perfect world and never will be.
bad things happen because thats part of life here on this earth..one could ask why if they go to a childrens hospital like St judes,they see kids with terminal illnesses while misserable people keep on living??? I don't have the answer to that,except it happens and is part of life.
life is a crap shoot..sometimes good things,sometimes bad things...
if a person does not seek out any good,they won't find any good...thats why i mentioned before finding a passion and living ones life for it....i happen to have a passion helping animals...some people have said saving one one pitbull or one stray dog or cat doesn't make a difference when so many are suffering..I say it makes a difference to the one I save and that is all i can do and what matters to me.....I adopted 2 cats a few months ago from a group of 700 confiscated cats from some collectors...did it make a difference 2 out of 700..well it made a huge difference to those 2..and that is all i could do.
so as far as permanent happiness..no such thing..BUT as far as things that can make a person happy,well all one has to do is look around and they should be able to find something to feel good about,unless they just don't want to.in that case they can always find something to complain about and go through life mad..i prefer to take some good with the bad that i already know is out there.but I'm simple like that....so we can either try and make a difference or just complain about it..
bad things happen because thats part of life here on this earth..one could ask why if they go to a childrens hospital like St judes,they see kids with terminal illnesses while misserable people keep on living??? I don't have the answer to that,except it happens and is part of life.
life is a crap shoot..sometimes good things,sometimes bad things...
if a person does not seek out any good,they won't find any good...thats why i mentioned before finding a passion and living ones life for it....i happen to have a passion helping animals...some people have said saving one one pitbull or one stray dog or cat doesn't make a difference when so many are suffering..I say it makes a difference to the one I save and that is all i can do and what matters to me.....I adopted 2 cats a few months ago from a group of 700 confiscated cats from some collectors...did it make a difference 2 out of 700..well it made a huge difference to those 2..and that is all i could do.
so as far as permanent happiness..no such thing..BUT as far as things that can make a person happy,well all one has to do is look around and they should be able to find something to feel good about,unless they just don't want to.in that case they can always find something to complain about and go through life mad..i prefer to take some good with the bad that i already know is out there.but I'm simple like that....so we can either try and make a difference or just complain about it..