what'swrong with online dating? I'll tell u. plz i want some support

[Rexus]

delete this thread please

 

[Newtype]

The girl you love is obviously in terrible pain and she's about to destroy her life and it will be something that she will have to deal with for the rest of her life, and you're here complaining about your sadness? your pain? And now, instead of trying to heal her heart and comfort her, you say you're gonna get drunk and sleep with a random girl?

 

[market.garden]

Yeah, I mean it sounds like she's having a bad knee-jerk reaction to the fight with her parents. She's probably cooled down know, so don't take it so personally.

 

[Rexus]

i'm sorry guys im not really good with relations I tried to call her many times but she wouldnt answer ill try again today what do u guys think the best thing to tell her is please give me advice i feel worse now thank u

 

[market.garden]

Don't bombard her with calls if she's still worked up over what happened, maybe just send a message letting her know if she wants to talk about it then you're there for her.

 

[mads]

Don't bombard her with calls if she's still worked up over what happened, maybe just send a message letting her know if she wants to talk about it then you're there for her.

I agree 100%. Maybe she is just not in the mood to talk right now, so best to leave her alone, but tell her that she can just call you and you will be there for her. But it will just ruin your relationship with her if you call and messages her all the time

 

[da_illest101]

call her at max twice a day, dont give up on her yet

 

[Rexus]

this hurt. I am 25. I'm sry, bt u knw with our conditions we scar easily and see things differently. im sry i came out as self centered. i stopped calling her n sent her a msg telling her i knw shes in great deal of pain bt she should show her dad nt by throwing her life away bt by being successful and tht one day shell be doing wht she loves with someone who really deserves her. i told her i dnt blame her for leaving me and i understand her n if she ever wants to talk to someone ill always be here for her.

 

[redski]

What the hell? What kind of man are you? The girl you love is obviously in terrible pain and she's about to destroy her life and it will be something that she will ...Thanks.

Temper temper....come on, the guy is upset/confused and you bash him.

To OP, give her time to simmer down and try go get in touch with her.
Then ask yourself if you really want to be with a women like this. If
she really did what she said may be you are better of with out her.
She sounds young.

 

[Newtype]

I don't even think I was hard enough on him. His age is irrelevant. When you're sleeping with girls, you're not a kid anymore. You better step up and be a man and ALWAYS be there for the girl who will open up to you. He didn't seem to care all that much that the girl is gonna go around sleeping with strange men, probably getting raped at some point, she might become pregnant or get STDs, maybe fall into drugs, who knows? I hope he's realizing it now and that he's gonna do all he can to help that girl.

 

[mrb]

hmmmm what can i say if it was me i wouldnt give up on her yet lol all that stuff she said was through anger and tears ... all i can say is i hope you 2 sort it out ....

 

[Rexus]

i thought about all those man! I have OCD, severe social anxiety, mild psychosis, and hh. I've been off my meds for a week now. Girls tht care for me are hard to come by and i interpret things badly. I will be there for her. I thought about sleeping around with men and what not and it hurt me all the more especially since im nt there n cant do anything abt it. plz stop bashing me

 

[redski]

I don't even think I was hard enough on him. His age is irrelevant. When you're sleeping with girls...

I am sorry but you sound confused. He is on-line dating the girl.
He never once mentioned that he is sleeping with her in fact if I understood
what he wrote correctly they have never met in person.
Secondly given the nature of this community I think you should be a little less harsh.

 

[Emily_G]

I couldn't be with someone who drinks, partly because of this very reason.

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

I've been on this forum for a week and everyone is so soft. I had to step up and do what others cannot do.

It's a support forum.

 

[dooby-duck]

The way I see it is that you've both got a bit emotional. She's angry at her dad and being drunk and is over reacting to the situation. You being socially anxious and also having OCD have taken to heart all the things she's saying in the heat of the situation. I think you should give her some time to sober up and calm down so you can both take this further rationally.

 

[mrb]

It's a support forum.

yep it is some people tend to forget that mention no names

 

[Dronee]

Rexus, take a breather, hon. Since you're on meds I assume that you have been seeing a therapist or a doctor. Maybe you ought to make yourself an appointment and let him or her know how you've been feeling lately, and that you've been off your medication. Does your doctor know that you've been off your medication and has he or she specifically told you to stop taking your meds?
I really hope that venting here helps, but considering your mental health issues, you should probably try not to worry too much about this girl. Yes, I know how harsh that sounds, but if you can't handle worrying about her (both mentally and physically) - if it makes you worse, then there isn't much you can do to help her. If you're in such a bad state and can't help yourself then you won't be helping her anytime soon. Maybe you ought to suggest that she seek professional help as well because she seems to be having a really rough time.

Good advice. Someone once told me that to take care of others, you've to take care of yourself first. I think he was right.

 

[redski]

Read again. He said he would get drunk and sleep with a random girl. When you write things like that, you're probably sexually active.

That is not what I said you are trying to put words in my mouth.
I said that they had never met in person and probably not have had sex.
I am talking about them only because of their relationship but you insist
to bring everything else into this. For arguments sake I am assuming.

Also, he is upset just like the girl was in saying things like "I am just going
to go sleep with a random person". Now, those are just words to me.
We know not of what action has been taken yet.

Sometimes in life you need to pay the price for what you do. I've been on this forum for a week and everyone is so soft...

He is not responsible for her choices. He can
advice her and beg her but if she does what it is she says then those are her
own decisions. Seems like you are blaming him for something that has not or may not happen.

Also may I add. How does this reflect on her. She gets pissed and threatens
to sleep around. Does she at all respect him?
Weren't they on-line dating?

To the OP.
Just relax and let things simmer down. I can only imagine how hard this
must be for you.

 

[Dronee]

That is not what I said you are trying to put words in my mouth.
I said that they had never met in person and probably not have had sex.
I am talking about them only because of their relationship but you insist
to bring everything else into this. For arguments sake I am assuming.

Also, he is upset just like the girl was in saying things like "I am just going
to go sleep with a random person". Now, those are just words to me.
We know not of what action has been taken yet.


He is not responsible for her choices. He can
advice her and beg her but if she does what it is she says then those are her
own decisions. Seems like you are blaming him for something that has not or may not happen.

Also may I add. How does this reflect on her. She gets pissed and threatens
to act like a tramp and sleep around. Does she at all respect him?
Weren't they on-line dating?

To the OP.
Just relax and let things simmer down. I can only imagine how hard this
must be for you.

Have to agree with you there. I'd suggest to the OP to try doing something like exercising, art/other hobby or some other healthier avenue to calm yourself down. Then after you're in a better state of mind, you can think things through better.