What do you do when walking down a street?

I_jailed_me

Well-known member
Hi, I'm interested in your quote 'the same train over and over'. Have you ever tried to break this train of repetition? I ask because this is what I am trying to do now. This again and again element to my gaze direction whenever someone comes into view seems so unnecessary and unwanted. The consensus of this thread seems to be 'think about something else' and by doing so one loses their preoccupation with other people. Its working for me.

To start of i was never Sociophobic when i was kid, matter of fact i used to be the MOST talkative kid in class and earned me many detentions, then as a teen i did not do well in exams and so i became shy, later on due to repeated failures and self doubt i became sociophobic. So even though i remember how i was as a NON-Shy person i cant seem to get back, So i used the term train as in its a track of mind that keeps repeating its own path. I used to belong to another path, strangely mutherfukeing world and their stupid laughs and mocking pushed me into this.
 

Solitudes_Grace

Well-known member
I perpetually monitor myself when I walk down a street. In particular, I always focus on the way my arms and shoulders look. I'm always trying to figure out how much I should swing my arms, whether I should put my hands in my pockets, or whether I need to move my shoulders back. I think I walk like a zombie when I don't consciously monitor myself. I try to avoid walking down streets as much as I can.
 
I have a very hard time making eyes contact with people. My mind always puts thoughts in peoples heads that might not be there. I'm afraid that if I look at someone for more than 3 seconds that person will start to think, "Why is she staring at me? Weirdo."

So I usually look at the ground, scenery, text on the phone, anything but looking at other people.
 

SoScared

Well-known member
As a rule I generally mind my own business.

If only it was so easy!

I know think that I hyper vigilant which means that I am constantly scanning for threats (real or imagined). In my case the perceived threat is people. This type of hypervililange can stem from individual event or a more constant stream of situations that put you on constant alert for stimulus (bullying and the fear of bullying) would be an example. Another analogy is of serving military when return home constantly being on alert and hyper-vigilant and seeing every person/event as a threat even though the threat no longer exists.

There are ways to combat this. Obviously to relax but more specifically you can try and re-train your brain not to focus on the stimulus which causes your hyper vigilance. So, now for example, instead of always focussing on people I am trying to enjoy any greenery that is around, the shape/colour of buildings etc, etc, and make these my primary focus. Essentially one replaces your existing primary and for me only focus with new non-threatening ones which over time become part of your subconscious.
 

lyricalliaisons

Well-known member
I usually focus on my cell phone, either by looking at texts or facebook. I also daydream. That helps a LOT. If not for that, I wouldn't be able to leave the house ever and it's already very hard as it is.
 

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
It depends where I'm walking and how I'd feeling.

If it's somewhere I've walked many times before and am used to I'm often totally lost and thought and oblivious to most of the people around. I'll either look down or ahead, but not really think about what's going around me. I'll sometimes forget to turn if I'm going a root that takes me two places.

I am aware of my surroundings in those cases sometimes, or if walking somewhere I haven't before or if I see someone I may have to interact with, things along those lines I become more unsettled. I sort of act lost and am not sure what I am supposed be doing. I'll become very aware of where I'm looking and if I catch myself looking at someone I try to make it look like I was just casually scanning the area. If I approach a stranger on a sidewalk I'm always fighting with myself what to do - should I make eye contact and smile, should I look ahead, should I look down? Usually it changes from person to person, because no matter what I do it feels weird and like the wrong thing. I'll watch my feet a lot, and where I'm stepping. I often try to time my step so I avoid cracks or to do so in unison with music if I have it.
 

Silatuyok

Well-known member
I look around at the trees and plants, and often stop to look at bugs or animals. Or, I look in people's windows as I walk past their houses, hehe. I wouldn't go out walking if it weren't for all the things to see.
 

SoScared

Well-known member
I’m giving this hyper-vigilant idea some exposure practice. So that I can re-train my brain I am doing some exposure practice. I idea is that, in the general theme of things I don’t focus only on people but instead take in other more interesting things as they come into my vision. I have found that museums are an ideal safe place for this exposure practice. I let myself flow taking interest in the objects on display as opposed to people as they come into view or alternately are standing next to me. Seems to be a good start at this new practice.
 

mikebird

Banned
Been in different modus operandi
over the years

I don't like stares, when I can't tell if people consider my face, clothes as good, bad or funny. In local crowds, I have a beaming smile and wink for everyone. They seem not to like it, and take it as a mock.

Getting to work by train & tube was a perfect way to enjoy music on foot and get in the right mood as I arrive, because everyone else does that on public transport. My biggest redemption was that nobody else ever speaks to anyone, either. I did look downwards, just to avoid dog****, etc. The look on my face was a stern frown (no mirror to look in) to 'say' stay out of my way when I have a destination, achievement and pace in mind. Not ambling, or static on an escalator.

I'm a lot happier driving now, with amps and a sub in the boot. That's proper isolation, as well as watching traffic and concentrating to keep safe. Umm... having the driving license revoked is one of life's worst punishment

Some people in an office listen to earbuds all day. I won't do that. Pushing people away. I don't speak enough, but my ears are open.
 

MissPsychNerd

Active member
Oh thank goodness. I seriously thought I was the only one who feels funny walking down a street *sigh of relief*

I feel slightly more normal now. XD

I always end up looking at the ground. I try to keep my head up, but when I do that my walk ends up looking so stiff because I get so tensed up, ahhh ::eek::
 

A Many Splendored Thing

Well-known member
I think I walk more fluidly when I'm not thinking about how I walk.

If I have music, I could think about the music or real life. If I don't have music, anything goes, but it's usually something not relevant to real life. I'll also blank out from time to time, but my subconscious still affects me...

I'm aware of my surroundings but not looking around all of the time. I usually avoid busy streets and people even if I have to go out of my way. I have a hard time around so many cars since I usually can't see in them very well. Waiting at a crosswalk on a busy intersection is the worst; I can't stop the feeling that I'm being watched.

If somebody walks by, I switch between looking at them or looking away based on their demeanor. If I'm greeted, I copy their greeting, because that is usually the only thing I can think of.
 
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