Should I talk?

[R3X]

There's this girl i have a BIG crush on.She's cute,pretty,smart,happy,friendly,loves to smile in which i'm the EXACT opposite of.I take public transport to class so like a year ago,i only saw her a couple of times(I didnt have crush on her back then because i had another crush LOL) but earlier this year,I saw her again.

Quite frequently this time(she grew her hair longer(medium).It's somewhere around this time that I had a crush on her.She's my only crush(my previous crushes never even smiled) that ever smiled at me(always) AND said 'hi' to me first.

I was shocked(happy kind of shocked LOL),i pinched myself seeing as how this can only happen in dreams LOL.Anyways,when she takes public transport,she used to be alone,now usually it's with her friends(Males.Rarely mixes of both).I usually wait for her to arrive at the bus stop(a bit stalker-ish right? lol) so i can get as much chances as i can with her.It lasted for quite a few months until 4 months ago.I stopped seeing her then.It's only her friends(i dunno if it's her REAL friends or just college/class/course mates).

At first,i thought that maybe it's because i was acting like someone "dangerous" (stares/smiles/says only 'hi' and 'bye') and scared her off LOL.So i thought positively and thought to myself that maybe she's on semester break or her schedules changed or something.Trust me,I've tried thinking of EVERY REALISTIC possibility out there but what i did?I waited for her everyday in the same place(bus stop) for 3+ hours or so hoping i would meet her again and try my luck and i repeated doing that for 3+ months now.So i'm starting to get worried and right now i'm sort of thinking that maybe i should talk to her friend(too late maybe?) and ask about her like ,

"uhh..excuse me,hi.Are you from <insert college name>?Are you friends with a girl that has <insert description of Her here>??She usually takes the bus but now i don't see her anymore.Do you know where is she or what's she doing now? "

I don't wanna make it obvious that i like her(i'm scared her friends will tell her) so is the above enough not to make it obvious that i like her?I actually tried talking to her friend and had the chance to do so(twice this week) but i wasn't sure what to say + chickened out + too shy .So,i ask anyone in this forum,what am i suppose to say / do?I REALLY need help 'cause i got no one to talk to about this with and i've got not much time left since i won't be going on public transport any longer (gonna finish my course) so any helpful replies is DEEPLY appreciated.Thanks in advance!

Ps.
i think her friends sort of know who i am (not my personal details but more of my presence.),probably because of my constant staring at her(they saw me staring).They must be thinking i'm a stalker or something. LOL

 

[Kinetik]

There's no harm in asking, but I would be nonchalant about it and try to condense the conversation to a single question, because in reading your highlighted section, you're asking a girl you don't know three or four questions in rapid succession which might seem a little pushy. Not that it matters a whole lot, but if you don't want her to get wind of your romantic interest in her friend, it would be wise to be as blasé as possible.

 

[deleted user 1]

Just floating around the background is definitely off putting. If you don't seize the day, you'll miss any opportunity to get to know her. For I guarantee you, she isn't going to fall into your lap. You have to put yourself out there. After that? The ball's in her court.

 

[honeydippedxo]

Take it as a lesson learned for next time you like a girl, to talk to her and take a risk before its too late. DO NOT ask one of her friends, if she didn't think you were creepy before she will if you do that. Don't wait around for her either. She's living her life, live yours. If you see her again tho take that chance! You dont have anything to lose by talking to her. Even if she doesnt feel the same for you she sounds like a friendly person and if she's rude then she's not worth crushing on. Same for all the other girls you're interested or find interest in, in the future.

 

[3lefts]

You waited for 3 hours at the bus stop everyday? Ohk yes, maybe creepy.
But then very sweet that you were willing to do that.
Huh, I think you should have asked her her name when you had the chance! You should have done something and if nothing comes from this I think you should at least take it as a lesson too. If you like someone that much, try to at least talk to them. Even if you stutter or don't know what to say. Just ask her name and smile. Apparently studies say were most attractive when we smile, maybe that's why she caught your eye?
What ever you decide to do, be confident in yourself, no matter what.

 

[Acegame]

Ofc you know the answer yourself. Question is....do you dare

 

[Littlewilly]

Yeh! gedin there my son but listen playit cool aswell next time u c her & ur bound 2 just smile & casually ask her her name & prior 2 that make a slightly humourous quip like we must stop meeting like this but listen don't leave it 2 long blokey as u might completely miss ur chances u've gotta ged in there sumhow.I did that there woz this girl at work that I hadda huge crush on many years ago now & it just sort of happened at a click of the fingers but I did'nt do anything about it bcause I woz sooo shy at the time & after a couple of months she left & I said 2 myself thats it I'll never c her agen & I did'nt. I may not of gitten anywhere if I had of asked but at least I would've known where I stood::

 

[mismeek]

I agree with honey.. if you see the girl you like then say hi, but dont ask her friend..it will look really awkward.

 

[MsBuzzkillington]

I will have to agree with the others. Don't ask her friends any questions about her.

There is absolutely no way to ask a question like that and not make it obvious that you are really into her. I am assuming that you didn't have much conversation, it seems like you didn't talk more than just Hello. So you can't really know her well enough to like her this much. You don't really know her well enough to be close enough to her to ask her friends where she is, you are just some guy in the back round.

I say, move on. It's just an idealization of a girl that you have seen. You are building it up a lot more than it really is. There are tons and tons of girls out there who would be willing to give you a chance, just keep your eyes open and start talking with more girls you think are cute.

 

[R3X]

Well first off,I've read each one but since I don't have enough time to reply all of them,I'm sorry and THANKS A LOT.I appreciate every one of your replies.Really.I just needed confirmation/opinions/advice on what the hell am I suppose to do.I'm just doubting myself A LOT lately so I sort of needed help you know?Again,thanks.

Heh,I think I didn't explain properly,she is also interested in me and how do i know that?You guys are probably thinking i'm getting ahead of myself right?
The reason is because she gave me TONS of signs from stealing glances,smiling at me(the first few times we met she didn't),getting as close to me as possible(distance wise),and so forth plus,she was consistent at it meaning she did all of that(well,when i say all,i mean most of it)everyday to me for a couple of months or so and sometimes totally ignoring me AKA playing hard to get. So,i am REALLY positive she is interested in me.But asking me whether she's still interested in me now though i wouldn't know.I guess it's alright to ask her friend right?

Oh yeah,i've got a question,what would you guys think if a person you like/interested in has a liking for you as well and havent met for months.Then one fine day,suddenly that person you like asks your friend about you?Would you be creeped out / Would you like it?Thanks.Really appreciate it.

 

[Kinetik]

That's why I think it's fine to go ahead and ask - you're beyond first impressions so it doesn't matter if your question betrays your feelings. She may well be interested in you if she gave off as many signs as you say. If she's not, you lost her when you were staring at her long ago. It won't be because you asked her friend where she is. Nothing to lose, right?

 

[R3X]

That's why I think it's fine to go ahead and ask - you're beyond first impressions so it doesn't matter if your question betrays your feelings. She may well be interested in you if she gave off as many signs as you say. If she's not, you lost her when you were staring at her long ago. It won't be because you asked her friend where she is. Nothing to lose, right?

Hahaha,you sound like me at the bolded part.That is always the conclusion i get everytime I finish a "debate" against myself.Yeah,i guess you're right.Thanks.Maybe I'm just over-thinking/analysing too much eh?Heh,i complicate simple matters huh? LOL
So,I guess tomorrow's the day then,the day that i start to be more assertive instead of just being passive all the time.At least for once in my life huh.Wish me luck.

 

[3lefts]

Good Luck! I'm really interested to see how this goes.
In any case, I hope you find her and get a chance to be with her

 

[R3X]

Good Luck! I'm really interested to see how this goes.
In any case, I hope you find her and get a chance to be with her

Thanks but i dunno if there is an update 'cause there's none.There were chances and i was mentally prepared AKA 'do or die' but i had no chance to talk to her friend.I'm so close to just give up really.I'm mentally and physically(you guys know why) exhausted.I've tried to get to know some girls,hell even pretty ones but i'm not interested at all cause my mind is constantly thinking of her.This is real torture man,at least my definition of it.I've had A LOT of crushes before but this one just takes the cake really.I honestly,sincerely, DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE.Of course,i'm not stupid enough to kill myself over this but that feeling is there.That feeling of hopelessness you know?
Ughhh, sorry for the rant.

 

[Lionheart]

Thanks but i dunno if there is an update 'cause there's none.There were chances and i was mentally prepared AKA 'do or die' but i had no chance to talk to her friend.I'm so close to just give up really.I'm mentally and physically(you guys know why) exhausted.I've tried to get to know some girls,hell even pretty ones but i'm not interested at all cause my mind is constantly thinking of her.This is real torture man,at least my definition of it.I've had A LOT of crushes before but this one just takes the cake really.I honestly,sincerely, DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE.Of course,i'm not stupid enough to kill myself over this but that feeling is there.That feeling of hopelessness you know?
Ughhh, sorry for the rant.

Dont give up my friend!Its easy to give up on something like this and it hurts so much if you like or love somebody but cant get closer to him/her.I tottaly understand this and I think writting her wouldnt be the worst idea atleast she get to know that you like her.Im at the same situation at the moment so i cant give much advice or help:/

 

[R3X]

Dont give up my friend!Its easy to give up on something like this and it hurts so much if you like or love somebody but cant get closer to him/her.I tottaly understand this and I think writting her wouldnt be the worst idea atleast she get to know that you like her.Im at the same situation at the moment so i cant give much advice or help:/

Thanks.At least someone can sorta relate.Sucks a lot right??Everyday i beat my self up(not physical beating LOL) about not saying anything more than just a 'Hi" to her.I've given up on a lot of women before but it's just that this girl is different you know?Of course,there were countless times where i thought to myself "man,i'm tired.I should just give up.what's the point of waiting anyway?it's been months and i still don't see her." but heh,the funny thing is i dunno if it's either persistence or just pure stubborness but i kept waiting and waiting.As of now though,i'm just exhausted.I've tried to get some kind of advice/opinions whether if it's on the net or real-life(VERY limited) but i'm still undecided whether to just give up AKA "move on" or just keep doing what i;m doing.It's either i follow my feelings or my logic.I'm at a dead end right now.

 

[Sial Axetder]

Well first off,I've read each one but since I don't have enough time to reply all of them,I'm sorry and THANKS A LOT.I appreciate every one of your replies.Really.I just needed confirmation/opinions/advice on what the hell am I suppose to do.I'm just doubting myself A LOT lately so I sort of needed help you know?Again,thanks.

Heh,I think I didn't explain properly,she is also interested in me and how do i know that?You guys are probably thinking i'm getting ahead of myself right?
The reason is because she gave me TONS of signs from stealing glances,smiling at me(the first few times we met she didn't),getting as close to me as possible(distance wise),and so forth plus,she was consistent at it meaning she did all of that(well,when i say all,i mean most of it)everyday to me for a couple of months or so and sometimes totally ignoring me AKA playing hard to get. So,i am REALLY positive she is interested in me.But asking me whether she's still interested in me now though i wouldn't know.I guess it's alright to ask her friend right?

Oh yeah,i've got a question,what would you guys think if a person you like/interested in has a liking for you as well and havent met for months.Then one fine day,suddenly that person you like asks your friend about you?Would you be creeped out / Would you like it?Thanks.Really appreciate it.

Those are signs? huh, I don't see those.

Your question: Creeped out? No. Confused? Yes. Would I like it? I wouldn't know - Confused.

 

[Solitudes_Grace]

I apologize for sounding negative, but I think it might be rather unhealthy to think about this one girl for so long. Love can be awesome, but it can also be destructive. Don't let it eat you up. Move on, and you will feel free.

 

[Aussie_Lad]

My advice: Never give up on this girl, unless you find out for sure that she doesn't like you or is already taken. Keep your options with other girls open, and try not to obsess about her. If you let this opportunity slip by without giving it your best shot, you may not have another crush for a number of years. It has been almost too long too remember since I had a crush on someone. What I wouldn't give to have just a moment where I feel a connection with someone from the first time I lay my eyes on them.

 

[schist]

DO NOT ask her friend to talk to her for you. Ever heard of "Chinese Whispers"?