she said she was looking for a bit a badass
not a jerk
not someone who is bad
there is a difference
Urban Dictionary: badass
Ah there it is. I knew it was coming.
And herein lies the problem that I have been trying to explain for such a long time.
Firstly - it's all semantics isn't it.
Easygoing/nice does not equate to being a pushover or not being self assured. They are not exclusive from each other - however I think people's interpretation of it is. If you are pleasant person to be around then you MUST be a pussy.
I am not a pussy, far from it - just because I use consideration and manners and I like being nice to people I like doesn't make me a pushover - even though it seems to be interpreted that way.
The problem is over compensation - she want's a badass, which according to the definition provided by coyote means confidence, urban dictionary is the epitome of accuracy so we will go with that. However I have noticed a tendency that women who want bad asses go for guys who over compensate and are actually 'jerks' instead - which is another interesting observation, it seems of the two spectrums - the one that wins out is usually the guy that has confidence but also just treats people like garbage.
but I digress. Once again when I read comments like that I feel like I should just turn into a cocky pompous disagreeable douchebag with a massive ego.
Anyway.... she had bad teeth. That is my non negotiable deal breaker. But if I hear that I am too 'nice' again then really - it's just a stupid thing to say. You are just perpetuating this 'girls like jerks' myth that everyone hates so much.
Next up - the progression of dating and why it's natural to feel good about meeting someone you are excited about... before the inevitable rejection without any solid good reason.
