Hi EgoZero and 206Raider. Okay this might sound a bit silly but give it a go. Pick a cool hobby, something that you've always wanted to learn, like how to play guitar to a high standard.
The thing with hobbies is that gaining the skill is all completely in your control, all you do is practice and practice, learn how to fix this mistake how to do that, throw your guitar down on the ground and get pissed off, and then the next morning the feeling of frustration has cleared and you are ready to pick up your guitar and master that tune dammit!! ^_^
The reason I suggest this is that you begin to learn skills in small ways that transfer over into other areas of life such as perseverence, not giving up, pushing yourself to do something your scared you will mess up etc etc.
And all the while, you are having loads of fun (because it's a fun hobby that inspires you) and the increasing levels of skill you gain and the finished product you have to show for it gives you such a self esteem boost.
For me I have learned how to knit from scratch, (don't laugh, but it was something I had always wanted to learn!!) and am starting a complicated sweater after a year of learning to knit and pesevering through thinking I would never get good enough.
Learning this skill has helped to show me, that I can make things happen if i want to.
Also, I think it might be worth it as an investment in yourself, to pay a coach or counsellor that will always be encouraging and will model positive attitudes and encourage you to go for that thing you may be avoiding. You have to choose a coach carefully though and it should be the right person for you and someone you feel like you can work with.
The repetition does seem to sink into your brain. I think repetition is very much key for learning new behaviours.
I read the askmen. com and everyone there is always like "take responsibilty for yourself" "take action" "stop complaining" to everyone there, but in a good way. (Btw these are all thing that I do A LOT!) but from reading the askmen board and hearing these comments over and over, I've begun to think twice before doing these things. So I think that yeah reading a good board for becoming more in control of your life will help too. As it will repeat the same ideas over and over, and your brain will take note.
:
: