Wow thanks guys. I'm pleased with all the responses. The last time I posted in a forum, nobody responded, and it hurt me. I started this thread with the title I GET USED A LOT because that is my main issue. Rather than tell you all the many ways I get used, I just started babbling about my friends. I guess if those closest to me, use me, and don't appreciate me, then I can't expect much from the rest of the world. I am a super nice guy undergoing a metamorphosis. Every single day someone tries to take advantage of me, make me look stupid, talks down to me, or disregards and disrespects me in some fashion.
@COYOTE:What do I get out of being a nice person? It used to make me feel good to put a smile one someone's face. It no longer does, as now I am starting to despise people. I wish I wasn't changing. I used to be so nice people thought I was gay, now my family says I'm becoming an a$$hole.
@GUMMIBEAR: I know I just have to find the right people to hang around, but I'm 37 now, and it seems futile. Sometimes I think I should just stay indoors forever, until I finally die and am free. I can't even enjoy hobbies, like playing guitar, because I either have to play by myself, or with my friends who won't play the songs I like. And nobody wants to hang with me; I have to do all the legwork if I want to hang out. I did an experiment where I didn't call my friends for six months, and they never called me either. It's like the friendships only exist in MY mind, or they are one-sided.
@PACIFICLONER: Yes, but I don't think I give TOO much. I buy my friends presents on there birthdays, things like calendars, or a cd. Is that too much for a friend? They have never even got me a card. I guess I can't expect them to be as giving as me, but a little respect or acknowledgment would be nice.
@JAIM38 and HELLHOUND: Good point, but I've developed slight social anxiety over the years, and its SO hard to make friends since I hate going out and doing things, alone. Any recommendations on where to meet cool people in your late 30's? I don't even like doing the same things as others. I can't swim, I'm afraid of heights, I don't like drinking, I can't do any sports, I don't even like watching sports. I only like playing guitar but I'm too shy to play live anywhere so thats going down the drain too.
@MIKEYC: I tried talking to them but they say things like "dont be gay" or "you're too senstive" etc. You are right...when I was a doormat, they were much nicer to me, now that I'm being more assertive, they are getting angry. I had one friend who I would visit every Saturday, because it was too small at my old place for him to visit. Then I moved to a bigger place, and he still expects me to do all the driving to his place on Saturdays, although I pointed out that I have a better place now. He's mad that I even brought it up, and hasn't called me.
@RICHEY: This doormat problem has already reared its head at work; someone even took credit for MY work once. You are right...certain environments require different states of mind I guess. I have to learn to calibrate.
@RODRIGUE: I'm trying my best.