How important are friends to you?

[Iseesky]

Not boyfriends or girlfriends or spouses or family...but, friends.

As of right now, I feel like it wouldn't be so bad if I only saw my friends once a month or so...Instead of every few days. Maybe I just say this because I don't trust my friends as much as I think I should. I do have friends that I see every few months, and our relationship is much better.

Maybe I wouldn't be saying this if I had a better relationship with my friends...I don't know. It's difficult to find friends who you can spend time with and talk to who listen and care about you. I feel like I'm better off with my family who genuinely cares about what I say and won't go talk about what I say to other people.

Just curious...How important are friends in your life? Do you have friends? If yes, do you trust them and appreciate what they do for you? If you don't, do you want them? Why?

 

[dottie]

friends are important but i have very few because of the obvious SA. i appreciate what they do for me and likewise. they have to be on the same wavelength and not be high maintenance. you can care about people deeply without having to call them every two days.

how old are you, if you don't mind me asking? are you in school with them? do you work full time? i'm just curious because i rarely hang out with my friends... maybe once every three weeks or so. when i get off of work i just come straight home to regroup myself and destress. plus it is expensive to hang out with friends. hanging out with friends can cost $12 gas + $5 bridge toll + $4 coffee, so i consider it a luxury when i do see them, and likewise. they are in the same boat.

annnnyway i just spotted a spider crawling up my wall. g2g

 

[kihira]

Clearly having friends is not a matter of life and death, I don't have any real life friends.

Hmmm...are online friends real? I hope so :]

I was thinking about this today, I have better friendships online than offline - it simply works for me and I would have next to no good friends otherwise. Online friends are no less real or worthy to me than if they lived in my neighbourhood.

 

[Sprunk]

I wished i had friends,though all the real life friends i had,i pushed away because of SA.

 

[Patrick26]

I'm not obsessed but people to hang out with mean something to me. I'd love to always be busy hanging out with 1 or more people, always be texting people texting me wanting me to talk to them. Sure beats sitting at home being depressed IMO. Friends are rare for me. In lementary i had 5 or 6 friends i hung out with. Junior high i had 0 friends. High school i had 2 friends which turned out to be just to make fun of me behind my back 2 years AFTER school. College i had none because i was only there for 2 months upgrading. Right now i have 1 friend and i'll be moving in with him in September. Says he will change my life knowing i am kind of a loner. I'd love to be outgoing and have many friends and lots of fun and good times.

 

[deadend]

Personally, I've never had too many friends. I moved a lot when I was growing up so it made it difficult to really establish anything long-term. In any case, I've always had a few friends but it never exceeded a small group at a time. Which is fine with me, really. I guess friends never really meant all that much to me - but I also realize that most will be temporary anyways.

 

[kihira]

i can write an essay on this topic.
bottom line - cant see myself happy without having those.

Thoughts on online vs offline?

 

[Paahi]

I've lost most of my friends because of SA. But I like being alone so It's ok.

 

[dyingtolive]

I wished i had friends,though all the real life friends i had,i pushed away because of SA.

Me too.. its hard becoz i need distance, alot of distance.. and for a long time, lol. so the distance that most ppl want are not like mine. it would seem that the distance i need in itself is a signal for people to go away.

on the other hand, some people are comfortable with lotsa distance. after all this is the internet age, facebook age. so i can sorta maintain friendships online somewhat, atleast.

friends are important, but i wish friends could stay friends even when they dont see u so often.

 

[mikebird]

I had crucial friends, when we were in the 'same boat' with lots in common.

School, university, and tertiary to this: hospital, and jail.

Sad when we diversify and go on different routes in life. There are a few mates still right here in town, but we rarely speak. Others are in different countries, and 100s of miles from here.

The root cause is my social weakness. Not a phobia - more an incapability

I think it's beneficial for all to accept a failure of communication. It developed between us over time. I know it's not sensible for others to make efforts with me, as they have; as I can't.

 

[***deleted***]

I'd say they are very impotant, but i've lost every friend i've ever had, so my actions speak differently

 

[BlueDays]

They are very important. Or I should say were very important. Every friend I had in real life I eventually lost contact with due to the problems my SA caused.
I only have one online friend now. Unless I get a job soon, I don't have any other way of meeting a new friend in real life.

 

[simpsons2007]

I don't have any real friends only the one in my head. But I think friends are can be important. Just knowing that you've got someone there to help pick you up when your down or someone to talk to if you need to. Someone who wont judge you because of your problems or just to hang out with to take your mind off things.

 

[Bloir]

What friends..?

 

[Phoenixx]

Friends have always been important to me, yes both online and off. I don't have a ton and I don't see them every day, but that's alright for me. I think I'd rather see them every once in a while than every single day. I cherish my space.

 

[pebblesdundee]

I have no in real life friends, but friends online mean loads to me, and make life bearable, without them I don't think I'd be able to go through every day. So thanks friends

 

[userremoved]

They're pretty important to me. I like to have people my age to relate to but it gets harder as everyone progresses into different stages of life. Make them while you're a kid and try to keep them, because it gets a hell of a lot harder to make new friends out of the blue when you're an adult.

 

[shybutsexy]

Maybe this is just me but to me they are everything. If i had friends i think i wouldnt complain about anything another day of my life, i would be happy despite everything else.

 

[MrJones]

I used to have some friends, now I have lost them. But they were very very important to me, they made me feel better... I want to have friends again ::

 

[Feathers]

I like friends but I need some space too... Both offline and online... So I like contact now and then, and meaningful socializing, not just sitting staring into emptiness lol.. Or talking about 'same old'... It's better to take a walk together (and it's free too!! haha) or go do something meaningful, see a new place or volunteer together etc.

Actually you can see friends for free (or close to that) it depends what kind of friends they are though and where they live... We used to even party for free lol, when I was still a student, just drink tap water and dance, haha!!

Some people I haven't seen for years (or ever) and still consider 'friends'...

Some have different lifestyles now and we don't see each other so often, I still like and respect them.. Don't feel so much need for contact with some of them though..

As you go along, you meet new people... new interests.. Sometimes it's good to reconnect with people from the past too.. Sometimes you 'click' with new people better.. or have more in common..

I do need alone time too, it's maybe even more important than the need to be with people.. Some people can understand that, some not so well.. It's maybe easier online in some aspects, 'live' people bring a whole new dimension that is really good too!!

I think we all need different kinds of friends: some people to laugh with, some people to cry with, etc. There was an article about different kinds of friends everybody needs, it was quite insightful.

I think good friends understand and accept each other's imperfections and just enjoy the good times and good aspects of someone more than focus on the 'bad things'.. You might obsess about your own imperfections but maybe your friends won't even see them!! (Or they won't matter!) And there are most likely tons of people worldwide who'd LOVE to be your friends!!