How did you meet your friends/best friends/mate?

[HeadFace]

I've just been meeting people through people It's hard for me to approach anyone.
As in, I met my best friend (and sometime I feel like my only friend) through my ex-friend.

How bout you guys? People always say that social clubs, teams, and whatnot are always a great way to meet anyone.

 

[IGotSeoul]

How bout you guys? People always say that social clubs, teams, and whatnot are always a great way to meet anyone.

Yeah I'd have to agree with this. Environments where people gather with a shared interest or have people working towards a common goal will usually show better results when regarding things like friendship.

 

[MagicPotion]

I'm not doing so well. I'm having to make new friends now and I'm kind of sucking out loud at it.

I'm lucky I still have 2 good mates (in another town now) and I knew them since before I had social phobia problems. Here, I spend all my free time alone, usually on dating sites hoping I'll be able to find a partner.

Okay, so you could try and use this site to meet somebody in your area. You can use the internet to find groups to go to. There's a website called meetup.com that allows you to join social groups in your area, but sadly it's just the UK though. There must be something similar for the US.

A big problem is there's loads of ways to meet people for a date online, but not many to meet new friends.

SA groups could be a nice place to start practicing meeting people with similar difficulties, in a more forgiving environment. I've found mine a good starting place to learn group socialising (which I am completely hopeless at).

Then I agree with you IGotSeoul - try and find a group in your area that offers a shared interest and a topic of conversation you're knowledgable about. Then if you run out of stuff to say, you can still talk about the shared interest (that you'll know a lot about already). I've got a few I'm going to try once I feel more comfortable.

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

Same here. I met most of my good friends through other people. Funny enough, I met my few good friends through this girl I now completely hate but have to thank for introducing me to them.

I agree with MagicPotion about the SA groups. Ever since I joined this place I dreamed of SPW having some sort of gathering where people from this site could meet each other locally in each individual state and country. I honestly don't think it would be that awkward since all of us here are shy one way or another and would actually understand each other and be able to approach each other knowing no one would be making judgments against anyone. Now that would be awesome

 

[Srijita52]

I've just been meeting people through people It's hard for me to approach anyone.
As in, I met my best friend (and sometime I feel like my only friend) through my ex-friend.

How bout you guys? People always say that social clubs, teams, and whatnot are always a great way to meet anyone.

Same with me,my best friend(also my only friend) was introduced to me by a former friend.
Clubs & teams are best ways to meet people cos you already have a common interest,it didn't work for me though.I feel like I could've done much better if I didn't have SA,although we did end up being pretty much friendly with each other.

 

[Paahi]

I met most of my friends through friends i already had.

 

[megalon]

Well then those of us who don't have any friends to begin with are just screwed?

 

[Seri]

I met my friends in High School. Since then I haven't really been able to make any other friends, because it's just really difficult for me to find people with similar interests. Add to that being awful at socializing and even when I do end up in a social situation chances are I'll stay by myself and just want to get out of there as soon as possible.

 

[Phoenixx]

I met most of my friends through other people in high school too. But, I did meet one of my best friends through a summer camp. That was years ago though, I was only 6. I just find it amazing we're still friends. I don't talk to her as often anymore because we're so far away (and she has a life ). But when we do talk, even after it's been a while, it's like nothing ever changed. It's not awkward, if anything it's just the same as it's always been. It's nice.

Oh, and the last friend I made was through a culinary art class this past year. She's pretty expressive, artsy, she's always caught my interest (Not in that kind of way). I eventually just pushed my anxiety aside and decided to talk to her, get to know her more. It was actually easy talking to her and getting to know her. She's not shy, nor is she uber outgoing. Turned out we got into the same music/bands, and we have similar interests.... Now that I think about it, she's the first friend I've made all on my own since I was a kid. Everyone else had been just through other people.

 

[userremoved]

Well my best friend I met in high school. I saw him drawing a comic book character and asked him about it. My 2nd I met in Tae Kwon Do class. And all others I met through them. If you can get a hold of at least one social friend, they can introduce you to tons of people.

 

[userremoved]

Well then those of us who don't have any friends to begin with are just screwed?

Talk about motorcycles and cars to the guys at work. Guys like cars. You do it enough and they'll ask you to hang out and have beer.

 

[HeadFace]

I met most of my friends through other people in high school too. But, I did meet one of my best friends through a summer camp. That was years ago though, I was only 6. I just find it amazing we're still friends. I don't talk to her as often anymore because we're so far away (and she has a life ). But when we do talk, even after it's been a while, it's like nothing ever changed. It's not awkward, if anything it's just the same as it's always been. It's nice.

Oh, and the last friend I made was through a culinary art class this past year. She's pretty expressive, artsy, she's always caught my interest (Not in that kind of way). I eventually just pushed my anxiety aside and decided to talk to her, get to know her more. It was actually easy talking to her and getting to know her. She's not shy, nor is she uber outgoing. Turned out we got into the same music/bands, and we have similar interests.... Now that I think about it, she's the first friend I've made all on my own since I was a kid. Everyone else had been just through other people.

Wow, that must've taken a lot, to push yourself. As much as I've always wanted to, I always find it hard to introduce myself... But I try to get myself to think things like..
"okay whats the worst that can happen? Who care if its quiet for a while, not like I havent gone through that..."
So how'd your first conversation go? I always feel like I'll come off as desperate or weird by approaching someone else...

 

[Duraldo]

Mostly because they lived in the same building as me and I ran into them by accident and had to talk to them, otherwise, I'd have no friends at all.

 

[WeirdyMcGee]

Always school.
I worked with classmates in highschool but by the time I was in college- I was in the city and didn't work with anyone my age. I was the youngest person in the company, actually XD
Next youngest person was 35!
I would say I was on friendly terms with all of the people I've worked with but it's harder to 'go out and do things' when you're working with older people. They have home lives, children to look after, money to worry about-- although I had been out with my co-workers to restaurants on a few occasions; as a group. In that respect, it was very nice to work in an all female environment.

My 'best friend' as I may regard her-- I met in highschool. Grade 10. My first friend. I have not seen her in 3 years and we rarely speak, so I'm sure she's found a replacement for me- but that's fine. haha
I also have a close friend online and we've never met eachother before, although we've been talking for 7 years or so. Maybe online relationships are meant to stay that way, though...?

Anyways-- school/classes/work/volunteering are the best ways to make friends, I find.
If you can get a job with people your age- it would be most beneficial if you're looking to make friends with your co-workers. Be proactive, ask people to do things with you, add them on facebook- just be friendly (if you're friendly naturally, then that's wonderful! XD)

 

[Luka]

I met most of my friends through friends i already had.

I did too. It's weird that just by having the one friend at school leads to meeting so many more people.

 

[Phoenixx]

Wow, that must've taken a lot, to push yourself. As much as I've always wanted to, I always find it hard to introduce myself... But I try to get myself to think things like..
"okay whats the worst that can happen? Who care if its quiet for a while, not like I havent gone through that..."
So how'd your first conversation go? I always feel like I'll come off as desperate or weird by approaching someone else...

^ Yeah, it actually took me a year to finally warm up and start a conversation. :: But I'm glad I did. She was youtubing in class one day, when we had a free day, and I just came up and sat next to her and asked her what she was up to. Basic and simple, and I actually didn't think the conversation would go anywhere. She was listening to some bands that I listened to also and the conversation sorta just took from there. It's kinda easier to talk to someone if you find they have very similar interests. Although, I honestly didn't think we'd even become friends. She actually started talking to me more afterwards. (It's nice when someone expresses interest rather than you trying to build a conversation every time.) But yeah, it was nice to actually push myself out of my usual comfort zone.

 

[megalon]

^ Yeah, it actually took me a year to finally warm up and start a conversation. :: But I'm glad I did. She was youtubing in class one day, when we had a free day, and I just came up and sat next to her and asked her what she was up to. Basic and simple, and I actually didn't think the conversation would go anywhere. She was listening to some bands that I listened to also and the conversation sorta just took from there. It's kinda easier to talk to someone if you find they have very similar interests. Although, I honestly didn't think we'd even become friends. She actually started talking to me more afterwards. (It's nice when someone expresses interest rather than you trying to build a conversation every time.) But yeah, it was nice to actually push myself out of my usual comfort zone.

Maybe that's the key to it. Approach the situation without any preconceived expectations, then you don't put pressure on yourself to make something happen. Whatever happens happens and there's no need to worry about the outcome.

 

[Psychedelicious]

Foolish

I didn't .

 

[Deus_Ex_Lemur]

Re: Foolish

I didn't .

You met me. I'm yer furry lemur fwend.

 

[Dead_on_Arrival]

When I moved into my previous home my new neighbour took it upon himself to come and say hello and pretty much didn't leave for the whole day insisting on helping us move in. We found we had loads in common and have been friends since.