How desirable do you think you are to the opposite sex?
- Thread starter Jim_Bergerac
- Start date
Iseesky
Well-known member
I feel stupid and vain rating myself...But, I'd give myself an 8 in the physical department and a 6 in the mental department. I always feel like a child when it comes to the opposite sex. I feel like I'm 10 years behind everyone else. Not intelligence wise, but when it comes to life, I guess. I would be perfectly content at the beach looking at tidepools all day or looking for bugs or doing a craft. I can hardly keep track of friendships nevermind a relationship with a guy.
Tiercel
Well-known member
Logically, I know I'm a zero. I just can't imagine an American woman wanting a man with no job, no degree, and no inherited wealth. I'm also shy, quiet, balding, overweight, sarcastic, pale, and I still live with my parents. Oh, and I can't forget that social phobia and depression. And because of all that most women my age don't stick around long enough to learn that I'm intelligent, thoughtful, caring, helpful, and quite handy to have around. But I must be doing something right, since old ladies adore me.
Otherwise I'd ask you to ask me again when you find a desirability meter that goes to 11.
Otherwise I'd ask you to ask me again when you find a desirability meter that goes to 11.
Chiaroscuro
Active member
My looks are probably 6-7. But you know I think it comes down a lot to confidence and how you project yourself. It also comes down to how you feel. If you can really get under someone's skin or seduce them (intentionally or unintentionally) with your personality they could find you a lot more attractive - they might see you as more physically attractive because of your expression and body language.
It's also about how you view yourself. That's where a lot of us on here come unstuck, including me I think. So if I project myself badly and appear to have a low self esteem my desirability is probably very low like 2-3. If I really projected myself well I could maybe be a 10 in some person's eyes. Who knows.
It's harder though, the less photogenic, or successful etc you are - because their are so many people with shallow perspectives. But IMO that is not so much a survival gene/Darwinian thing like it's popular to believe. It's more a sociological thing. Being shallow is not a great state of mind. Nobody who cares really wishes they didn't or that they were more shallow. Being shallow is either because of ignorance or emotional immaturity - or the product of an emotionally underdeveloped society.
So maybe we need to be brave enough to care only about what that minority of caring people think. Or else be strong enough to impress a shallow person (who you can tell is good 'underneath') so much with your own confidence that it forces them to look inwardly at themselves. Then with a new perspective they could find you not only attractive but someone who 'made them a better person'. Not saying this is easy - but it's only self doubt that's in the way.
It's also about how you view yourself. That's where a lot of us on here come unstuck, including me I think. So if I project myself badly and appear to have a low self esteem my desirability is probably very low like 2-3. If I really projected myself well I could maybe be a 10 in some person's eyes. Who knows.
It's harder though, the less photogenic, or successful etc you are - because their are so many people with shallow perspectives. But IMO that is not so much a survival gene/Darwinian thing like it's popular to believe. It's more a sociological thing. Being shallow is not a great state of mind. Nobody who cares really wishes they didn't or that they were more shallow. Being shallow is either because of ignorance or emotional immaturity - or the product of an emotionally underdeveloped society.
So maybe we need to be brave enough to care only about what that minority of caring people think. Or else be strong enough to impress a shallow person (who you can tell is good 'underneath') so much with your own confidence that it forces them to look inwardly at themselves. Then with a new perspective they could find you not only attractive but someone who 'made them a better person'. Not saying this is easy - but it's only self doubt that's in the way.
agoraphobickatie
Well-known member
according to what others say, i guess i'd have to rank myself fairly high.. but i just don't think that way about myself, haha.. i understand that others find me attractive, and i'm totally fine with that; but i feel like if i were walking down the street and saw someone who looked just like me, i would just think she was average looking.. maybe i'm just way too picky? good thing i'm not a lesbian! lol
Helmaninquiel
Well-known member
lol I don't think I'm worth enough to even put myself down as a zero.::
:
I wish I knew what girls are thinking. I wouldn't dare ask a girl what she thinks of me, physically.
Pink_Paula
Well-known member
Neither would i. i mean i wouldn't ask a guy what he thought of me, i'd be to terrified of their answer!
Pink_Paula
Well-known member
Well, I already told you what I think of you
awww now you've made me blush :
:
CPA23
Well-known member
I think physically, I would give myself around an 8, maybe a 9. I'm about average height for a guy (5'9"). I have a muscular build and I weigh about 185-190 lbs. I didn't always think I was good looking. When I was growing up, I really wasn't into my looks that much. It wasn't until I was in my early 20s that I started to be aware of how I looked physically to others.
However, on a confidence scale, now I would give myself a 6 or 7. I used to be like a 2 or 3 in that department. I actually think that self-confidence outweighs physical appearance (most of the time). If you look good, but you are not confident in yourself, then others will see that and that would make you less attractive. Most women like men who are confident (not arrogant) in themselves. That is something that I have been struggling with every since I was a teenager. Now, I am getting better and I am beginning to be more confident in my ability to find a woman. I haven't actually done it yet, but at least my confidence is better!
However, on a confidence scale, now I would give myself a 6 or 7. I used to be like a 2 or 3 in that department. I actually think that self-confidence outweighs physical appearance (most of the time). If you look good, but you are not confident in yourself, then others will see that and that would make you less attractive. Most women like men who are confident (not arrogant) in themselves. That is something that I have been struggling with every since I was a teenager. Now, I am getting better and I am beginning to be more confident in my ability to find a woman. I haven't actually done it yet, but at least my confidence is better!
Afraid to die alone
Member
Hard to say. Anywhere from 3 to 5.
SingleAloneForever
Active member
Hmmm on a scale of 1 - 10, with 1 being about as desirable as herpes, possibly -1000.
And that's me being extremely generous.
And that's me being extremely generous.
