Today, I'm up. For the last week I've been up and down like a roller coaster. It's like I'm bipolar. (I'm not.)
On Friday, when I was still in an "up" phase, I asked my friend if she'd like a visit (she lives a few hours North in a remote area and has always said she loves having guests). She hasn't replied yet, and I'm trying not to read anything into it, but I keep checking my email over and over again and it's getting me down.
She's the nicest person ever, so even if she says no, she'll do it nicely, and for a good reason (e.g. her medical issues are flaring up). Reaching out like that was a big deal to me, part of my new campaign to force myself to socialize more, and I'm probably going to crash down again if it backfires. Which I know is ridiculous. Hmm. I should take this as an opportunity. Learning to be a social person means learning to deal with hearing "no" as well as "yes". It's not always going to go my way, and I need to be okay with that.
