Steppen-Wolf
Well-known member
How many of you have dealt with emotional dependency?
In particular, emotional dependency towards people.
I think any human being can fall victim to this, but those who suffer from SA might be more vulnerable and suffer far bigger effects from it, as in many cases there is very little in our lives that we can hold on to as we try to overcome such dependency.
My personal story about this is a little extreme, I think, to make a long story short I developed a huge emotional dependency (but I was completely oblivious to this fact at the moment) towards a girl some three years ago. Some 18 months ago thigs fell apart between us and I've had almost no contact with her since then.
What followed both shocked me and almost ruined my life, my anxiety went totally out of control as I felt her emotional support was the only thing keeping my mind together, I became a hypochondriac (I became convinced I suffered from everything ranging from cancer, liver failure to Parkinson's disease), fell into a deep depression (there was a particular week in which I couldn't do anything but cry all day) and started suffering serious panick attacks (the last one of them led me to being taken to the ER, as I truly felt I was going to die).
I always knew I had emotional problems, but when I was separated from the emotional confort of this girl my world just fell apart... I couldn't think or do anything, just remember her, wanting to get her back.
The irony of the whole thing is that being in such a pathetic and vulnerable state motivated me like nothing before, I wanted to stop feeling like that and I was going to do whatever it took to accomplish that.
I went to a psychologist, and did what she told me... The result?, I still suffer from SA but I made a huge step forward as now I can at least at times function like a somewhat normal human being.
Still, 18 months later I can't truly say I've totally overcomed my emotional dependency, it may now be some 20% or 15% of what it was at it's peak, but I still have to deal with it every day.
My advice to anyone who reads this, never EVER think that the solution to all of your problems resides in one person, because people go away, people get tired of you and people die. And what do you think is going to happen to you then?
Don't try to sustain your life on a single pillar, no matter how strong it seems, you need many even if they are smaller and weaker.
Don't fall for the temptation if you ever meet an amazing person, who changes it everything, who makes you see life in color once again, make him or her a part of your life, but don't make them your whole life.
In particular, emotional dependency towards people.
I think any human being can fall victim to this, but those who suffer from SA might be more vulnerable and suffer far bigger effects from it, as in many cases there is very little in our lives that we can hold on to as we try to overcome such dependency.
My personal story about this is a little extreme, I think, to make a long story short I developed a huge emotional dependency (but I was completely oblivious to this fact at the moment) towards a girl some three years ago. Some 18 months ago thigs fell apart between us and I've had almost no contact with her since then.
What followed both shocked me and almost ruined my life, my anxiety went totally out of control as I felt her emotional support was the only thing keeping my mind together, I became a hypochondriac (I became convinced I suffered from everything ranging from cancer, liver failure to Parkinson's disease), fell into a deep depression (there was a particular week in which I couldn't do anything but cry all day) and started suffering serious panick attacks (the last one of them led me to being taken to the ER, as I truly felt I was going to die).
I always knew I had emotional problems, but when I was separated from the emotional confort of this girl my world just fell apart... I couldn't think or do anything, just remember her, wanting to get her back.
The irony of the whole thing is that being in such a pathetic and vulnerable state motivated me like nothing before, I wanted to stop feeling like that and I was going to do whatever it took to accomplish that.
I went to a psychologist, and did what she told me... The result?, I still suffer from SA but I made a huge step forward as now I can at least at times function like a somewhat normal human being.
Still, 18 months later I can't truly say I've totally overcomed my emotional dependency, it may now be some 20% or 15% of what it was at it's peak, but I still have to deal with it every day.
My advice to anyone who reads this, never EVER think that the solution to all of your problems resides in one person, because people go away, people get tired of you and people die. And what do you think is going to happen to you then?
Don't try to sustain your life on a single pillar, no matter how strong it seems, you need many even if they are smaller and weaker.
Don't fall for the temptation if you ever meet an amazing person, who changes it everything, who makes you see life in color once again, make him or her a part of your life, but don't make them your whole life.
