Do you still want to have children?

becks

Member
more than anything else, nothing could give me more motivation than fathering a son or daughter
 

O'Killian

Well-known member
I can't describe how much I love my baby girl!! When you say the relationship is unique, you are so right, there are no words to describe it! She has changed the world for me...you really do start to look at the world through her eyes and everything is just a little more beautiful.

I also appreciate your comment about making change in the world today. I couldn't agree more:) I've read through these posts and while I agree the world is a scary place, I don't think we have a right to decide that it isn't worth living in. Who knows my baby could change the world for the better!!

Thanks for your words:)

Heh, thank you for yours. I was starting to feel I was about the only one who felt that way.

sometimes it just happens

whether you planned to or not

and then what do you do?

If you're having sex, you're risking conception and should have at least the inkling of a plan what to do about it. Either you raise the child or you give it up for adoption.
 

silveraks13

Active member
Heh, thank you for yours. I was starting to feel I was about the only one who felt that way.

Nope! You aren't alone::p: I woke up thinking about this today! I want to share with you who puts color into what used to be a grey world!!

This is my baby girl, Xiola!!
 

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Meggy0001

Well-known member
I have never wanted kids and at the moment still don't. It's not that I dislike kids they are alright but having one of my own seems like I would be giving up my life for them even though I don't have a life lol. But who knows one day I might change my mind I usually do
 

FallenFeathers

Well-known member
I'm not sure, I think creating life is one of the most special things ever, but with that comes a hell of a lot of responsibility.

I found out I lost a child recently, I had a one night stand before Christmas, she got pregnant but miscarried. Without going into details it would of been a messed up situation to bring a child into.. but I can't bring myself to say it "was for the best" because I feel this great loss ::(:

The whole above situation makes me realize I'm maybe not mature enough to have kids yet, I mean the above situation isn't how I typically lead my lifestyle, but the whole thing has given me a reality check.

Anyway ranting.. I would love to have kids one day, but ideally when I was In a much better place mentally and economically.
 

RoomBound

Well-known member
No, I do not want children.
Funny thing is, people say I am good with kids LOL!

Good to see I'm not alone. Funny, yes, people see me enjoying playing with elementary age kids and they say I'd be a great father. LOL I feel more of a disconnect with teens, though.

I'm such a worrier, though, I think I'd have a heart attack from the constant worry if I had children.
 

RoomBound

Well-known member
Sry mate but I strongly disagree with you.
Indeed your logic is not flawed but that only for and adult younger than 35-40.As time will pass you will have fewer and fewer friends...the only thing you will have is your family.

I don't see it as agree/disagree but personal preferences.

I have an elderly writing partner with a husband who was abusive so she didn't have kids, for fear he'd abuse them as well. But she cites the lack of help from family and that if she had kids they might be able to help them now that they're physically limited. But I've also read articles saying that having kids so that they can help you late in life, or having them due to parental neediness for any reason, isn't a good reason to bring more people into the world.
 

Waybuloo

Well-known member
I'm actually having my first born child due in september. It's terrifying yet feels so right at the same time. I wrestled with the same kind of thoughts. Why would I put another through all the pain I went through? Too many problems in the world and thinking this world is not a good place to raise children anymore. Intellectually it probably is a stupid thing to do. But life is not intellectual. Life will go on regardless of what you think or do. It seems that the more I submit to nature, the happier I feel. The older you get, the more you have this need to give yourself completely to something. That something is most easily and completely filled by children in my opinion. For the last 10 years, I've been trying to figure out my life, figure out what I want to do with my life. But it felt so wrong, because it was all about me. Life for me gets more content and happier when I can give and share. Nature is taking me down that path..not my brain and I'm much happier for it.

Yes you will see that having your child would propel you from stagnation. All the nappy changing, feeding and catching up on sleep will leave you little time to dwell on the negative. Guess what, having a child made me more positive and more immersed in life's comings and goings. I somehow, magically ceased ruminating on those stupid little 'mistakes' and faux pas.

I still think about what a horrible world my child will grow up in, and even if she lacks no wealth and comfort, there is a terrible truth about what human beings do to eachother which I sometimes find unbearable. When you actually see your baby learning about the world around it and enjoying life and time with you, you will realise that the point of creating life is right in front of you. It really is wonderful to grow another human being and be the source of their happiness and knowledge.
 

coyote

Well-known member
You are asking the question NOW? :rolleyes:

as much as anyone can decide for themselves beforehand that they do or do not want to have children, when it happens, unexpectedly, they might find that their entire thought process takes a dramatic change

i know that it did for me
 

Waybuloo

Well-known member
as much as anyone can decide for themselves beforehand that they do or do not want to have children, when it happens, unexpectedly, they might find that their entire thought process takes a dramatic change

i know that it did for me

Yes you can never be completely prepared for children if you don't know what it's like. And when you think you are prepared anything can happen. I found the whole parenting thing to be much easier and less scary than I had anticipated.
 

Generical

Well-known member
Gotta get the kidneys from somewhere.

I probably quite naively would love to watch them grow up into their own personality with their own values and interests.

Though i'd probably just be an ass.
 

MrJones

Well-known member
I think parenthood may be one of the most beautiful things in life. One of my dreams is start a family with the one I love and be a good father.

I would only refuse to this dream for a bigger, more important dream. (or because I can't have them).
 

Rawz

Well-known member
Currently I do not want to have kids and do not plan on it. Right now I have enough trouble taking care of myself and am far off from being able to raise kids. Honestly, I am not sure that I will ever be capable of raising kids, and even if I am I do not believe I will be capable of doing a very good job of it. My parents didn't do a good job of raising me so I haven't been able to learn from them much.

I would have to change a lot in order to be able to raise kids well. Right now my anxiety, depression, etc are in the way. And I have a lot that I would need to learn, experience, and practice before I am ready. I don't think I will ever get to where I would need to be.

Also, I'm not sure I would want kids even if I was ready and capable of raising them very well. It takes a lot of time, money, energy, etc taking of kids--even just one. I'm not sure I am willing to give up everything that I would have to in order to have kids. I think I would rather just enjoy life without everything associated with kids.
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
I would be a pathetic father. Also the world is also filled with over 7 billion people, over half of which are struggling to stay alive. Don't need to add more to the pool.
 

Griffin

Well-known member
For the longest time, I've always said no. I'm not that kind of person and I have no idea how to look after a child.

Nowadays, I feel a little different. Everyone starts out with a family and not knowing what to do. That's life.

In the same way that I now pine for a long term relationship, I would like to start a family. To be loved and to love others - that's something you can't replicate when it comes to your own family.

I don't fear that my kids will turn out like me. There are some aspects of me that I would like to see in them, and there are some aspects I would hope they never get saddled with.

If I have kids, they will turn out the way they turn out. I would do my best as a parent to care and provide for them, and then I'll see what life brings.
 

CrazyGirl

Well-known member
No. as much as I do love being around children, I do not want to raise them. For one, I wouldn't want to pass on my genes to them.
 
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