hmm, have you been too much behind the computer? or just living without human contact and such?
depression or depersonalization can do weird things to people...
I think if you weren't there/here, people wouldn't disappoint you at all... But you are ALIVE, and you still care...
It's maybe good to readjust expectations or beliefs... Have you tried any CBT yet?
Are you on any meds? Some meds can have iffy side-effects...
Or maybe you need to eat some redcurrants?
Or some other food that can make you feel more 'alive'? Like citrus/lemons or spicy food or such? Or go running/jogging...?
I sometimes needed to check myself in the mirror, to see if I was still alive/existed... lol It's been a while since that I guess... Maybe you could try if this works as well? Contact with people is great too, yeah, online or even better RL!!
Hope things get better!!