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Do you blame your parents?

Started by whatisis · Jul 8, 2011 · 99 replies

Do you blame your parents?

115 voters · voting is closed

#61
Sort of. My parents are nice people but there were a few issues growing up, particularly with my mum, that I think has contributed, but they weren't the sole cause or even the strongest reason.

Kiwong said: ↑
Having great parents and a good childhood doesn't prepare you for the dysfucntional **** of a place the world can be.
Too right.
#62
I think I do, they were very strict towards everythign...
#63
I don't blame my parents at all really. The way I am today is through my own doing, particularly through school years where I failed to branch out and learn the social skills that I still lack.

Parents maybe could have pushed me more during that time but I don't think it would have had much effect.
#64
No, not at all. Of course there are things they could have done differently, but those things are easy to see in hindsight. There's nothing they should have done differently, at the time I'm sure they did what they thought was best. They can't read minds, or tell the future, everything they did was with what they had presented to them. I didn't want anyone to see my problems or help me, so if anything I made it harder for them.
#65
I think my parents did the best job that they knew how...with the best intentions... and I think most parents do (well... I mean most loving parents that is)... after all, they are only human and have flaws, doubts and insecurities just like everyone else. I dont think any parent gets it 100% right.

I wish my parents could have done some things better yes...but I am still grateful for all the things that they managed to get right.
#66
Partly. They really loved to punish me but very rarely ever rewarded me or gave me praise. Not to mention the punishments were sometimes rather physical and unnecessary. I think their first mistake, though, was letting and wanting me to cling to them. That led me to be very dependent on them and avoidant and scared of people I didn't know.

The rest of the blame can fall on me and the immaturity of the children I faced in school.
#67
I don't blame my parents for how I am, that would imply intent of negligence. I do hold them partly responsible due to not knowing any better.
#68
My parents were messed up in the head. This is not a mean comment, it is actuality. My dad was a massive coward who left his kids, and worshipped my narcissistic mother, simply because that was the dynamic that made them be together. I could write an entire book on the dysfunction of my parents and the whole twisted family dynamic we had.

I don't "blame" them per se, I just understand that they were not well -- and unfortunately for me, I had to fall victim to that sad fact.
#69
KiaKaha said: ↑
I think my parents did the best job that they knew how...with the best intentions... and I think most parents do (well... I mean most loving parents that is)... after all, they are only human and have flaws, doubts and insecurities just like everyone else. I dont think any parent gets it 100% right.
Very true. Flawed humans bringing up flawed humans will always leave some kind of stain.
#70
I think they were the cause of a lot of problems I have now.
As someone else stated earlier, blame might not be the right word.

My mom was quite abusive and still is actually. She is extremely negative, rude, disrespectful, selfish etc. My dad didn't really contribute to anything good or bad).
#71
I blame my father, not my mother. My father was a heroin addict as well as a constant cheater. He gave my mom HIV and died when I was four. I blame everything on him. My mother on the other hand has been supported and tried to give me the best life she could.
#72
namelessmiracle said: ↑
I blame my father, not my mother. My father was a heroin addict as well as a constant cheater. He gave my mom HIV and died when I was four. I blame everything on him.
That is messed up. Sorry to hear that. :🙁:
#73
I used to blame them for other things, but not social anxiety when I had it. Unfortunately the blame game hurts you most of all, and boy I used to be good at it!
#74
I do somewhat but I still love them and really appreciate all they've done for me and still do for me. I just wish my mom hadn't babied me so much :'(
#75
Yes. And no. It's genetic in my case. They have/ have had it too. But they didn't know what it was or what to do about it. So when I said as a teen that I needed help they just said to get on with life & get over it. But they did their best considering.
#76
I sort of blame my parents, but I also feel bad about it because they help raise me and I should feel grateful that they didn't abandon me. But I do think my SA is partly inherited.
#77
I don't think it's entirely their fault, but they have contributed.
#78
i blame the elm tree in my front yard
#79
Not so much my mom but I will say my dad contributed alot to it. I also contributed to it my self I belive as well so I can;t put blame on people for how I am. Althought I think some of it was genetic.
#80
my dad was pretty shy - but he hid it well. i think i learned that from him. he grew up with a pretty severe stuttering problem apparently. my mom has always been very outgoing, but she didn't push me or my siblings to be the same. socializing was neither encouraged nor discouraged. we were mostly encouraged to be however and whomever we wanted to be.

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