Being looked at/stared at while eating- whaat?

[Kathryn.fr]

So I just now realized how much it bugs me, and how awkward it makes me feel to be looked at when I eat, and I'm not talking about like, "oh we're having a confersation of course I'm going to look at you." but like, my friend/roomie made me and her orange chicken and rice, and before we sat down to eat she kept asking me "kat are you okay?" "yes I'm fine please stop asking!" "okay, I'll stop, but you are okay?" omfg... Like, how does someone just choose to completely not listen to what I JUST said. So she asked if it's okay to check on me once in a while i'm like "god, no... just assume that I'm fine" so we're eating, and she puts some brittish comedian on the laptop who I just did not find funny, he just ragged on trans people and military. But as I was eating, clearly not interested in the stupid show, she'd look at me, like every time I pick my fork up to take a bite, I'd think it's safe and bam she looks. Or whenever the guy said soemthing "funny" she'd look over at me and I'm right next to her... idk why I never noticed before that I really hate being looked at just constantly by someone I'm sitting with ugs me even more cuz I can just see it out the corner of my eye. Does it bug anyone else, specially during meals?

 

[kihira]

I'm wondering if this is quite common, eating is a very personal thing so why are we forced to sit closely facing each other to do it? And don't even mention eating and talking at the same time. Or dinner table etiquette.

 

[Kathryn.fr]

Idk, we weren't really talking, it was just constant awkward moments where she'd constantly look at me for some reason. Made me not want to eat lol..

 

[Apotheosis]

From her perspective, she thought there was "something amiss" so she wanted to observe you to see if there are any signs its true. Granted, flatout staring at someone while theyre eating is not cool, but it sounds like she was just worried.

Maybe when someone does that, instead of answering to dismiss a worry, ask WHY the other person thinks you may be depressed or off about something. They might have had something like advice or comfort they wanted to share.

Or it could just be someone creeping from across the room. If that happens, send a few solid bricks in their general direction.

 

[Kiwong]

I eat alone, it's not something that bothers me, but I can understand how hard it might be for some people.

 

[Tiercel]

1) Maybe she was concerned about you.

2) Maybe she was feeling insecure about her cooking and comedian-selection skills, and was looking to you to either praise or dismiss each in turn. Did you comment on either the food or the comedian?

3) Maybe her brain is wired in a way so that movement (putting food in your mouth) automatically gets her attention. Next time try not moving; she might not see you if you stay still.

 

[Nanita]

It would have annoyed me extremely if someone kept looking at me in the way u described!

 

[Kathryn.fr]

Nah I guess she was worried I was depressed, I mentioned earlier in the day that I forgot to take my hormones and that saddened me that I actually forgot something very important. Maybe my body language told her I was sad, I may have been but not to a level where it was obvious. I think she was sad and wasnted to make sure her sadness didn't infect me lol.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

Yum hungry now I don't like eating with others because I get annoyed hearing someone else crunching like a chip or something.... it's not like you have to talk when your eating though but many do. You could say it's easier to taste all the flavors if you don't have to constantly talk....possibly

 

[tinygirl.93]

Eating should be done alone. I feel very awkward when someone looks at me while i eat. Like I look silly putting the fork in my mouth or something, i have no problem drinking anything in front of someoe

 

[Nouveau]

Sounds like she felt something was wrong. I get that sometimes, too.

As for me, I eat alone as much as possible (I will stop eating if people appear and wait until they leave to finish eating). I hate even knowing there is a possibility that someone is looking/staring at me while I'm eating.
It got so bad at one point (not that it's much better, now), I didn't eat in the school cafeteria... ever. I waited until after school to be at home to eat.
I do, however, eat in full view of people to please certain people in my family sometimes. Takes a lot of coaxing to get me to do it. I'll go out and eat or eat at the table, even though it gives me a lot of anxiety. I think eating is just really personal... to me, at least.

 

[Acegame]

I think it's very normal. Even for ppl who aren't socially anxious. I have it too sometimes when everybody is done eating and i'm the only one who's not. Nobody likes being stared at constantly. Especially when nobody is talking. You shouldn't make this a big thing in your head.