at night ..

[mrb]

when you cant sleep ... what are the things that you think about , your struggle with sa ? or maybe some things that you could really change in your life ? mine is worring about moving to another contry , will i be ok wont i :: im sure i will be but what keeps your mind turning at night when you cant sleep ?

 

[lyricalliaisons]

Usually when I can't sleep, there aren't really thoughts like that bothering me. Usually, the only thoughts in my head are daydreams & they're not what's keeping me awake, they're what's keeping me from getting up & giving up trying to sleep. But once in a while, like the night before last, I'll just suddenly have huge amounts of sorrow that just come out of nowhere & then I start crying & can't stop. I start thinking about how terrible & empty my own life is & about how hard my mom's life is & about her dying. All I can do is cry & cry & cry & I can never get to sleep after that.

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

The best cure I've ever found for sleeplessness is to physically exhaust myself during the day. Works better than any drug I know!

I still often have difficulty nodding off though, and to keep my mind from running over and over past mistakes and dread of the future (this used to be all that was in my mind at night), I do everything I can to focus (and usually refocus) my mind on some non-sexual fantasy. Then that plays over and over in my mind instead. I redo the bits that I'm not quite happy with and eventually I doze.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

usually, try to make up something nice to distract myself from thinking things that won't help if I were to overthink them

 

[mrb]

Usually when I can't sleep, there aren't really thoughts like that bothering me. Usually, the only thoughts in my head are daydreams & they're not what's keeping me awake, they're what's keeping me from getting up & giving up trying to sleep. But once in a while, like the night before last, I'll just suddenly have huge amounts of sorrow that just come out of nowhere & then I start crying & can't stop. I start thinking about how terrible & empty my own life is & about how hard my mom's life is & about her dying. All I can do is cry & cry & cry & I can never get to sleep after that.

:: im sorry to hear all that lol all i can say is i hope it gets better for you soon

 

[lyricalliaisons]

:: im sorry to hear all that lol all i can say is i hope it gets better for you soon

It probably won't lol, but so do I. Thanks

 

[nopark]

Money -- how that $10k in my savings account last year just dropped below $500, and how I'll be negative after filing stupid taxes.

Work stresses -- will I meet that deadline? Do I even care? I should quite, right? Maybe I should get a second job to earn some pocket money. Why didn't any of those potential clients accept my bid?

Loneliness.

My mom -- does she still think I'm gonna off myself?

Stupid mundane things -- Gotta go for that driving test next month. Gotta sell that stupid car in the driveway since I can't afford it. Why are there birds in my ceiling?

Usually what I do when it becomes too noisy in my head is fetch my iPhone and listen to an audiobook. Eventually I calm down and can sleep.

 

[coyote]

I think about all things I've screwed up and all the people I've let down, and I wonder how I'll ever be able to redeem myself.

 

[AimeeSP]

I usually can't sleep because i'm scared of the monsters in the cupboard. ::

I do get terrified of being alone in my room at night, i hate it. I have bad memories in that room and they keep me awake at night. I just seem to think about everything bad at night. Maybe that's why i always have bad dreams? I also tend to think about how my life would be if i were thinner lol and SA-less, maybe i'd be off to uni this year? maybe i'd be socialable? maybe i'd have more friends? so many what ifs, if only i didn't turn to food when i was younger, its a hard habit to get out of. ... ::

 

[Hellhound]

I don't really think too much, or try not to. I try to keep myself distracted with some music, videos... maybe talking to someone if there's someone online. Thinking doesn't do much good to me because I'm very negative.

 

[Emily_G]

Usually when I can't sleep I'll get up and use the computer or something. But when I do lay there I think of all kinds of different things. The birth of my son, taking care of him, embarrassing things I've done in the past, my mind just wanders all over the place.

 

[mrb]

I usually can't sleep because i'm scared of the monsters in the cupboard. ::

I do get terrified of being alone in my room at night, i hate it. I have bad memories in that room and they keep me awake at night. I just seem to think about everything bad at night. Maybe that's why i always have bad dreams? I also tend to think about how my life would be if i were thinner lol and SA-less, maybe i'd be off to uni this year? maybe i'd be socialable? maybe i'd have more friends? so many what ifs, if only i didn't turn to food when i was younger, its a hard habit to get out of. ... ::

hmm well i can help you out a little there aimee , theres no such thing as monsters

 

[FOR REAL]

at night i get out of bed

 

[Krista]

This is actually how I get to sleep, I relax into bed, close my eyes and think about all kinds of things until I fall asleep. My thoughts center around being on my own, what I would do and where I would live. I like to fall asleep to all the big dreams I have.

 

[AimeeSP]

hmm well i can help you out a little there aimee , theres no such thing as monsters

Oh yes there is! they hide under your bed and in your wardrobe, waiting for night to come out and give you a heart attack out of fright! ::

 

[Danfalc]

I also tend to think about how my life would be if i were thinner lol and SA-less, maybe i'd be off to uni this year? maybe i'd be socialable? maybe i'd have more friends? so many what ifs, if only i didn't turn to food when i was younger, its a hard habit to get out of. ... ::

You are still really young Amiee,even if you wasn't it is never too late to change something in our lives if we wan't it bad enough Yes once you get into the habit of something it can be hard to get out of.But it just takes time and commitment to change.

As for the original post

I hate night time..As soon as I get into bed it's like my mind start's racing.As soon as I try and relax,my thoughts drift to just negative stuff.I find experiences which I regret from years ago just popping into my head.It all builds and builds to the point where I cant get relaxed at all.

Someone once said to me good sleep is earned not given.I think I need to get back to the gym and stuff if I want to start sleeping better at night.

 

[xxaimsxx]

I can never sleep its so annoying. Hence why im online now!
I just think about my life really and what it will be like in the future. I have to go somewhere tomorrow so im feeling quite worried about that at the moment.

 

[Krista]

It's interesting that everyone is saying they stay up and think about how there life could be if they didn't have SA or what they would be doing if they could do anything..it plagues them until they can't sleep but this is the total opposite for me

I think the same things but they make me peaceful because I know one day I'm going to reach those goals of what I'd like to do. It gives me something good to look forward to, a challenge to get myself there.

 

[mrb]

Oh yes there is! they hide under your bed and in your wardrobe, waiting for night to come out and give you a heart attack out of fright! ::

no little one there called mods

 

[Scooter]

I imagine the perfect life/situation/relationship/interaction.....then I get reminded that I don't have it so I try to not think......just breathe