Any girls/women here who just feel like a freak?

[Stressball]

I dislike fashion, dyeing my hair and I rarely wear makeup. I have mostly done this because of the constant pressure from my mom growing up to be more feminine but lately have been rejecting it.

When I go into a store, I go straight in to get what I want and get out quickly. I dislike browsing pointlessly and buying 50 frivolous things I'll never end up using.

Most of my hobbies are traditionally male dominated. I have a deep passion for video games and tech. Art too. I also go out with my dad and we play around with remote control airplanes sometimes. I am also an avid gamer. This is mainly what I enjoy talking about. I know female gamers are only getting more common, but in everyday talk its still a taboo and most people will view you as some kind of stunted child if you ramble on about them. Coming from a woman, it is even stranger for most people. So I shut up and just pretend I love fashion or some girly thing to fit in most of the time.

Many people will also talk to me like I am an air-head for some reason, I feel they misinterpret my social anxiety as a lack of intelligence or snobbery. Maybe it is my fault, but its a pattern and its hard to deal with.

I guess I just feel this crushing pressure, like I can't be myself. I don't really know anyone like me, all of the people I talk regularly too are guys except one girl. I tried hard to be friends with her at one time but she always pulls away so I gave up. Many days I wake up and just feel like an alien in a human skin or something. I want to make more friends but social anxiety and fear of being too weird just makes me never want to.

Anyone feel this way?

 

[MotherWolff]

I dislike fashion, dyeing my hair and I rarely wear makeup. I have mostly done this because of the constant pressure from my mom growing up to be more feminine but lately have been rejecting it.

When I go into a store, I go straight in to get what I want and get out quickly. I dislike browsing pointlessly and buying 50 frivolous things I'll never end up using.

Most of my hobbies are traditionally male dominated. I have a deep passion for video games and tech. Art too. I also go out with my dad and we play around with remote control airplanes sometimes. I am also an avid gamer. This is mainly what I enjoy talking about. I know female gamers are only getting more common, but in everyday talk its still a taboo and most people will view you as some kind of stunted child if you ramble on about them. Coming from a woman, it is even stranger for most people. So I shut up and just pretend I love fashion or some girly thing to fit in most of the time.

Many people will also talk to me like I am an air-head for some reason, I feel they misinterpret my social anxiety as a lack of intelligence or snobbery. Maybe it is my fault, but its a pattern and its hard to deal with.

I guess I just feel this crushing pressure, like I can't be myself. I don't really know anyone like me, all of the people I talk regularly too are guys except one girl. I tried hard to be friends with her at one time but she always pulls away so I gave up. Many days I wake up and just feel like an alien in a human skin or something. I want to make more friends but social anxiety and fear of being too weird just makes me never want to.

Anyone feel this way?

I feel JUST like you! I don't know what category I fall in. I love alot of boyish things but I like some girly things too. I like to play videogames sometimes but I love my makeup too. It seems our kind is a rare sight indeed.

 

[Argentum]

I'm similar, and also don't know anyone else like me. I have a little interest in clothing, but I prefer a very natural approach to appearances without dye, piercings, a dozen different types of makeup, a dozen pairs of shoes, and the like. I also work in IT and enjoy a lot of conventionally male pastimes.

I have noticed that in educational environments geared towards STEM, men have been friendly towards me. Astonishing when elsewhere they're so rude. I think I listened to one talk about Minecraft for an hour?

 

[MollyBeGood]

Yeah-you just described me too.

I have been called an airhead before for exactly the same reasons. One yr my nick name was space cadet at summer camp even.

I am not a girly girl at all. I really like to get dirty and do guy stuff any day over clothes shopping and getting a manicure.

Someday I want to restore an old car. I would rather be sitting by a campfire drinking a beer, going fishing and hanging out with guys to any girl activity!

I think chicks like us are awesome and we should be proud. Guys also love us because we are this way. It's not a bad thing, trust me. You will find some people completely drawn to you for being this way. There are good people out there who realize what a treasure girls like us are. Mostly it's been guys who appreciate me for being this way, which is why I find it easier to be with guys but I have had a few female friends who didn't care if I wasn't a girlie-girl, too.

 

[Scury]

I feel like that all the time. I am currently studying computer science and I am an avid gamer. I don't have any female friends and the few friends I do have are male. In the last few years I have become comfortable in myself, but I find other people sometimes almost get angry when you don't fit gender stereotypes. There are a few guys in my class, who will roll their eyes at me when we talk about video games and ask me to "prove" that I actually play games, which I think is ridiculous. There is sometimes this no girls allowed attitude that drives me insane. They won't just allow you to enjoy what you enjoy.

Or when I'm in Computer Lab, some guys will constantly come by and ask me if I understand everything or need any help, even though I am in the top 5 of my class and my marks are better than theirs. I feel like women reject me for being too "masculine" and some men reject me for being "female".

I feel like I just don't fit anywhere. It really makes me want to scream sometimes.

 

[kihira]

18 Empowering Illustrations to Remind Everyone Who's Really in Charge of Women's Bodies

 

[Metal_isthe_Answer]

I dislike fashion, dyeing my hair and I rarely wear makeup. I have mostly done this because of the constant pressure from my mom growing up to be more feminine but lately have been rejecting it.

When I go into a store, I go straight in to get what I want and get out quickly. I dislike browsing pointlessly and buying 50 frivolous things I'll never end up using.

Most of my hobbies are traditionally male dominated. I have a deep passion for video games and tech. Art too. I also go out with my dad and we play around with remote control airplanes sometimes. I am also an avid gamer. This is mainly what I enjoy talking about. I know female gamers are only getting more common, but in everyday talk its still a taboo and most people will view you as some kind of stunted child if you ramble on about them. Coming from a woman, it is even stranger for most people. So I shut up and just pretend I love fashion or some girly thing to fit in most of the time.

Many people will also talk to me like I am an air-head for some reason, I feel they misinterpret my social anxiety as a lack of intelligence or snobbery. Maybe it is my fault, but its a pattern and its hard to deal with.

I guess I just feel this crushing pressure, like I can't be myself. I don't really know anyone like me, all of the people I talk regularly too are guys except one girl. I tried hard to be friends with her at one time but she always pulls away so I gave up. Many days I wake up and just feel like an alien in a human skin or something. I want to make more friends but social anxiety and fear of being too weird just makes me never want to.

Anyone feel this way?

You fit the definition of tom-boy to a tee in my opinion, some guys find it rather sexy too

 

[BlueDays]

Many days I wake up and just feel like an alien in a human skin or something. I want to make more friends but social anxiety and fear of being too weird just makes me never want to.

Anyone feel this way?

Yes, I have the same problem. I have never been a "girly girl" Although I wear make up, it is only to hide flaws I feel about my face which has to do with my anxiety, nothing to do with wanting to wear it.
As a child I preferred playing with toy racing car sets and boy games with the boy neighbors. I wish I was born a male, I would be a lot happier.
I don't fit in with other females either, so you are not alone. I suspect there are quite a few females like us, they are probably just not game enough to speak up in the general public as we are looked at as being so peculiar.:sad:

 

[Hellhound]

Apparently, not acting like a super-duper mature womanly woman makes me mentally retarded in the eyes of some individuals. My dad, for an instance, thinks I'm not mentally capable of anything, because I prefer action figures over sex, for example.

An acquaintance told me I'm boring and a therapist thought I had some disorder, another therapist said I was regressed. Not wanting to show my body, wear makeup and (THE MOST RELEVANT, IT SEEMS) not wanting to have sex has given me a bad image multiple times. I was told I'm "different".

I try to be as possitive as possible, but the world sickens me sometimes.

 

[jc972]

Yeah-you just described me too.

I have been called an airhead before for exactly the same reasons. One yr my nick name was space cadet at summer camp even.

I am not a girly girl at all. I really like to get dirty and do guy stuff any day over clothes shopping and getting a manicure.

Someday I want to restore an old car. I would rather be sitting by a campfire drinking a beer, going fishing and hanging out with guys to any girl activity!

I think chicks like us are awesome and we should be proud. Guys also love us because we are this way. It's not a bad thing, trust me. You will find some people completely drawn to you for being this way. There are good people out there who realize what a treasure girls like us are. Mostly it's been guys who appreciate me for being this way, which is why I find it easier to be with guys but I have had a few female friends who didn't care if I wasn't a girlie-girl, too.

Space cadet? I don't get it. Some sort of lame put-down? Aside from that... WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WAS SINGLE? :shyness:

 

[jc972]

Apparently, not acting like a super-duper mature womanly woman makes me mentally retarded in the eyes of some individuals. My dad, for an instance, thinks I'm not mentally capable of anything, because I prefer action figures over sex, for example.

An acquaintance told me I'm boring and a therapist thought I had some disorder, another therapist said I was regressed. Not wanting to show my body, wear makeup and (THE MOST RELEVANT, IT SEEMS) not wanting to have sex has given me a bad image multiple times. I was told I'm "different".

I try to be as possitive as possible, but the world sickens me sometimes.

"Different" don't automatically mean "bad". :thumbup:

 

[shyflower]

When I was a child, there was something about RC cars. I bought one right after another. I ended up with a whole collection of them.I was the only girl in the neighborhood who would race them up and down the driveway. I lked LEGOS and building the castles and had a Robin Hood set too. Now.. when people ask me what I did today.. I tell them I changed the blade on the lawn mower, I changed the oil in it.. I mowed grass with a push lawn mower. I detailed my car inside and out. I played an online game beating the crap out of some monster. Don't get me wrong.. I still like stuffed animals.. I have dolls I don't play with because they are more of a collectors item and are just my hobby. You wouldn't believe the reactions I get, especially when I tell them about me doing yard work, landscaping, etc.. There isn't anything weird about that..I guess what I find odd about them when I tell them that I mow grass.. they act like they have never pushed a mower a day in their life. Yep.. I am a girl and I have those capabilities. :thinking:

 

[jc972]

I'm similar, and also don't know anyone else like me. I have a little interest in clothing, but I prefer a very natural approach to appearances without dye, piercings, a dozen different types of makeup, a dozen pairs of shoes, and the like.

That's totally awesome. Natural is nice. Like you ain't tryin' to hide nothing. I like that. :thumbup:

 

[jc972]

Yes, I have the same problem. I have never been a "girly girl" Although I wear make up, it is only to hide flaws I feel about my face which has to do with my anxiety, nothing to do with wanting to wear it.
As a child I preferred playing with toy racing car sets and boy games with the boy neighbors. I wish I was born a male, I would be a lot happier.
I don't fit in with other females either, so you are not alone. I suspect there are quite a few females like us, they are probably just not game enough to speak up in the general public as we are looked at as being so peculiar.:sad:

I'm sure you have a great face

 

[jc972]

I tell them I changed the blade on the lawn mower, I changed the oil in it.. I mowed grass with a push lawn mower. I detailed my car inside and out.

..I guess what I find odd about them when I tell them that I mow grass.. they act like they have never pushed a mower a day in their life. Yep.. I am a girl and I have those capabilities. :thinking:

Sounds like a day in my life. I actually sharpened the blade on my push mower and changed it's oil last night as a matter of fact. The riding mower and the bush hog are still good to go. How odd you mention that. Maybe we're long lost twins? Anyway, I think it's awesome you do that stuff :thumbup:

 

[TreeBones]

I never got why things like video games, cars, legos and work outside the house belongs to the male gender and makeup, dolls, and clothes belong to the female gender, I personally don't believe in any of this. (and besides its common for guys and girls to step out of the stereotypes) I don't care if men wear makeup or skirts or that girls like cars and toy soldiers, it shouldn't matter. You definitely shouldn't feel like a freak.

 

[theoutsider]

You guys (girls) all sound awesome. Don't let society make you feel like there's something wrong with you. Many of us guys love the qualities you all are describing!

 

[Stressball]

I never got why things like video games, cars, legos and work outside the house belongs to the male gender and makeup, dolls, and clothes belong to the female gender, I personally don't believe in any of this. (and besides its common for guys and girls to step out of the stereotypes) I don't care if men wear makeup or skirts or that girls like cars and toy soldiers, it shouldn't matter. You definitely shouldn't feel like a freak.

Yeah, I suppose stepping outside of gender stereotypes is more common nowadays, but if you're not a social butterfly its way harder to connect to people if you have so little in common. I have zero clue how to interact with other women usually, particularly feminine women. I am always afraid of offending them somehow, since in the past I have been told I was too masculine and blunt with my thoughts. I constantly discover that being myself seems to lead to negative consequences, hence why I keep hiding who I am, trying to figure out how to be more likeable and adaptable around people. The hardest part is not really having any female friends, guy friends are great but there are alot of things only other women can empathize with.

Anyway it's really interesting reading other people's stories, thanks for people responding...I didn't even think anyone would respond. A bit painful to read too, I relate so much.

 

[WeirdyMcGee]

I never got why things like video games, cars, legos and work outside the house belongs to the male gender and makeup, dolls, and clothes belong to the female gender, I personally don't believe in any of this. (and besides its common for guys and girls to step out of the stereotypes) I don't care if men wear makeup or skirts or that girls like cars and toy soldiers, it shouldn't matter. You definitely shouldn't feel like a freak.

Exactly. I agree with this very much.
I was always called a 'tomboy' as a kid-- which was something I accepted as a positive thing. It meant I wasn't a whimp, right...? But why does a girl have to be a 'tomboy' just to be perceived as a 'tough' girl-- or as anything, for that matter?

These conceptions of how people are supposed to act are all just old stereotypes.
You should like whatever you like, period.

 

[TreeBones]

Yeah, I suppose stepping outside of gender stereotypes is more common nowadays, but if you're not a social butterfly its way harder to connect to people if you have so little in common. I have zero clue how to interact with other women usually, particularly feminine women. I am always afraid of offending them somehow, since in the past I have been told I was too masculine and blunt with my thoughts. I constantly discover that being myself seems to lead to negative consequences, hence why I keep hiding who I am, trying to figure out how to be more likeable and adaptable around people. The hardest part is not really having any female friends, guy friends are great but there are alot of things only other women can empathize with.

Anyway it's really interesting reading other people's stories, thanks for people responding...I didn't even think anyone would respond. A bit painful to read too, I relate so much.

I grew up with 4 older brothers and all their friends, we all lived by each other and there was only one girl in the neighborhood that I could be friends with. Then it kind of became like that south park episode where as soon as you start growing boobs, it's like you can't hang out with guys anymore so I had a tough time transitioning and relating to other girls, some people even called me a dike ( so did my brothers haha) So I understand how you feel, I still have a hard time around other females, and trying not to offend them (because sometimes I can have a raunchy or unfiltered sense of humor) ..to be honest they kind of intimidate me with their "normal feminine-ness" haha. I'm also not a social butterfly but I realized it doesn't really matter and that I should be myself regardless of what I think they think I should be.
Please try to be yourself as much as possible! Other women will respect that anyway.