How are you feeling?

[1BlackSheep]

I've been called so many names. A dickhead mainly. Maybe I am a failure, it seems so many where I work have that expectation of me, so much so that is has affected my health.

However, I have to keep trying to battle for myself, to look after myself, even if I feel lost, and a failure. I can't give up or descend into self hatred. I want to be positive, I want to feel good about myself.

My very survival could depend on how I proceed from here. The time of necessity has arrived again.

Hang in there, Kiwong!

 

[1BlackSheep]

so sick of people getting handouts and rewarded for being eff-ups while i struggle to make ends meet. it pains me to remain tactful and not call them out while they boast of their hundreds? of thousands of dollars fraudulence.

The political crap that goes on in the work world never ceases to amaze me!

 

[1BlackSheep]

Feeling nervous. For the past week or so, Ive been chatting with a girl who has gone through the same seizure episodes that I went through. We've been texting each other frequently and just now she asked me if I wanted to go for a walk with her tomorrow. I did my usual maybe routine, you know not make any promises so I can chicken out at the last minute and not go. I just don't know, Im pretty sure I'll just say I can't go, urrrggggg, how am I going to sleep tonight?

Awwww - go for the walk! It might actually be FUN!!!

 

[EscapeArtist]

Feeling nervous. For the past week or so, Ive been chatting with a girl who has gone through the same seizure episodes that I went through. We've been texting each other frequently and just now she asked me if I wanted to go for a walk with her tomorrow. I did my usual maybe routine, you know not make any promises so I can chicken out at the last minute and not go. I just don't know, Im pretty sure I'll just say I can't go, urrrggggg, how am I going to sleep tonight?

Do you think it would help to tell her that you have anxiety upon meeting new people? Or.... take extra pain meds... lol

 

[Srijita52]

so sick of people getting handouts and rewarded for being eff-ups while i struggle to make ends meet. it pains me to remain tactful and not call them out while they boast of their hundreds? of thousands of dollars fraudulence.

I'm sorry, its truly not fair.

Feeling nervous. For the past week or so, Ive been chatting with a girl who has gone through the same seizure episodes that I went through. We've been texting each other frequently and just now she asked me if I wanted to go for a walk with her tomorrow. I did my usual maybe routine, you know not make any promises so I can chicken out at the last minute and not go. I just don't know, Im pretty sure I'll just say I can't go, urrrggggg, how am I going to sleep tonight?

Do you want to meet her? But whatever decision you make, good luck with it!

Nervous, stressed out, and tired. Need some sleep.

I hope you feel better after a good sleep.

I want to kill myself, but am way too stubborn to give up.

I don't don't if I hate my depression or my pride the most

Hang in there.

 

[EscapeArtist]

I keep telling myself that I need to go to bed earlier so I can wake up earlier (ie before noon). But every night, I find myself in the exact same spot: on the computer.

Yep! I know the feeling. Maybe it would help to start journalling? That way you could (instead of saying "i'm going to bed early, now") plan to journal right before the time you go bed, in bed... And when you're done and tired, and already in bed and everything, you might feel more compelled to just sleep? Or if you read, you could plan to read 30 mins before your desired bed time maybe, but get ready/pjs/brushteeth before you read?

 

[Srijita52]

I thought I'd be feeling worse. Still, awful.

What's wrong? I hope you feel better.

one of these day s were i wouldnt care shooting myself. because thats what i deserve.

That's so not what you deserve. I'm sorry you're feeling such way. If you ever want to talk I'm here.

I've been called so many names. A dickhead mainly. Maybe I am a failure, it seems so many where I work have that expectation of me, so much so that is has affected my health.

However, I have to keep trying to battle for myself, to look after myself, even if I feel lost, and a failure. I can't give up or descend into self hatred. I want to be positive, I want to feel good about myself.

My very survival could depend on how I proceed from here. The time of necessity has arrived again.

You're not a faliure, I'm sure you'll be able to feel positive again.
Stay strong.

 

[1BlackSheep]

I keep telling myself that I need to go to bed earlier so I can wake up earlier (ie before noon). But every night, I find myself in the exact same spot: on the computer.

Could the Xtreme Mountain Dew have anything to do with it?

I have terrible sleep habits as well and almost never go to bed at the time I plan to!

 

[hidwell]

Caught bronchitis on the plane back from the UK, woe is me.

 

[Srijita52]

Caught bronchitis on the plane back from the UK, woe is me.

That sucks, I hope you feel better soon.

 

[KiaKaha]

Caught bronchitis on the plane back from the UK, woe is me.

That sucks - I have had bronchitis far too many times myself. Hope you feel better soon.

 

[Kiwong]

Thanks 1Blacksheep, Srijita and Beleza for the kind words.

Sending good vibes your way as well.

 

[JCVA]

Kinda lost on what to do today and it is such a sunny day too. Why oh why does this thinking always fall on a good day :/

 

[Valhalla]

Feeling down, in my case, I feel pretty normal. I know it's a form of self abuse, but I checked out an Internet page of someone who used to be in my class. I haven't done that in some time now since I know what it is doing to me.

Everything is going smoothly for this person, and I was reminded of another person that used to be in my class, I had already read about this person in the local paper and now had to see that he made himself into the biggest national paper. Where the person shows off his profession.

I've been looking at student housing. Starting to feel the stress that will hit me like a bomb in a month or so. Saw an advertisement that asked "me" if I had been checking out the festivals for the summer.

So now I've been reminded that I have no social life, no money, will possibly haft to struggle to get a residence and have no skills at all. Not that I already knew that, but still. Great. I'm living the life here.

 

[Graeme1988]

Lonely. Tired, I didn't get much sleep last night. Got a stomach ache, not feeling to fab today. But I'll get through it.

Other than that, the usually complaints and grievances. Feeling down. :: Lacking motivation to do anything. I feel completely unable to talk with my mother about my struggle with depression. We just argue. Why? I think it's because she'd rather be in denial about my depression, than give me the support I need. Being pretty cold and distant, emotionally. Maybe I'm wrong...? Or it could be her inability to take me seriously? As with most of my family. Which is by equal measure frustrating and f***ing patronising.

 

[Phoenixx]

Stuck. Frustrated. Anxious. Depressed. Whatever other negative emotion that comes to mind.

My friend told me she most likely can't move out with me this summer. Now I don't even know what to do. I don't have enough money to pay for rent on my own, as well as pay for college AND other bills I might have. Otherwise, I really would move out by myself. But I don't have a job and I can't just run out and get one however I wish. I live in a stupid town in the middle of nowhere, where the closest store is a half hour away. Without a license, I'm screwed. I'm stuck at home with no where to go. I've been waiting on rides for the last three years and I'm sick of it. I can't constantly wait on rides, especially when both my parents work, my brother works randomly and whenever, and my cousin just leaves whenever she wishes. I am working on getting my license, but it just isn't happening fast enough, especially since I need to take a course prior (which is next week).

I don't really know anyone else that could live with me either. My mother told me before to put up ads requesting a roommate. Easy for her to say, she's outgoing and has no problem with people. I REALLY don't want to go through that again, college was bad enough. Living with people I don't know left me with anxiety almost 24/7, and that was a long 3 months I had to deal with. I definitely don't think I could ever go through that again. ::

I really don't know what to do here. I really want/need to move out. I can't really stand living here with my family, with my cousin constantly around and us butting heads all the time. It's toxic, and being around her just makes me feel worse, to be honest. I can't stand living somewhere so inconvenient and out of the way either. I just feel so, so stuck. ::

 

[Phoenixx]

Feeling nervous. For the past week or so, Ive been chatting with a girl who has gone through the same seizure episodes that I went through. We've been texting each other frequently and just now she asked me if I wanted to go for a walk with her tomorrow. I did my usual maybe routine, you know not make any promises so I can chicken out at the last minute and not go. I just don't know, Im pretty sure I'll just say I can't go, urrrggggg, how am I going to sleep tonight?

^ Hey, definitely take her up on the offer. Sounds like it'd be nice.

 

[lonely_drummer]

^ Hey, definitely take her up on the offer. Sounds like it'd be nice.

Do you think it would help to tell her that you have anxiety upon meeting new people? Or.... take extra pain meds... lol

Awwww - go for the walk! It might actually be FUN!!!

I hope you sleep it off and sleep well.



I would feel nervous in that situation too, being poor at conversation. Do you really want to talk to this girl?

I do really want to go and meet up with her, she seems nice and just chatting to her has been helpful with dealing with the seizures and the meds I have to take but my nerves right now are really eating at me. Uggghhhh I don't know what I'm going to do. She probably invited me out because I seem nice to her. I may sound good on paper but wait till she actually meets me, the big dumb ugly awkward guy. I think I might just stay in my cave

 

[Srijita52]

Awful, I'm sick of people telling me that I can't and I'm sick of my limitations stopping me from getting what I truly want. Its simply not fair, this is one of those days when I feel like giving up.

 

[Phoenixx]

I do really want to go and meet up with her, she seems nice and just chatting to her has been helpful with dealing with the seizures and the meds I have to take but my nerves right now are really eating at me. Uggghhhh I don't know what I'm going to do. She probably invited me out because I seem nice to her. I may sound good on paper but wait till she actually meets me, the big dumb ugly awkward guy. I think I might just stay in my cave

^ No, seriously go. She'd be so happy to meet you in person, I bet. You're not dumb or ugly, and so what if you're a little awkward. She may be just as nervous meeting up with you, you never know. Go have some fun, drummer.